


Mixed Signals

by darkrose705



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-23
Updated: 2015-10-03
Packaged: 2018-02-26 17:44:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 41,561
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2660849
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darkrose705/pseuds/darkrose705
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Melody Larson is stuck  in a rut and she absolutely hates it. Fate steps in and Melody meets Ray. Although polar opposites, they start to learn that they may have a few things in common....</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Just My Luck

**Author's Note:**

> “We are sun and moon, dear friend; we are sea and land. It is not our purpose to become each other; it is to recognize each other, to learn to see the other and honor him for what he is: each the other's opposite and complement.” –Hermann Hesse

"Melody, you can go home soon." Mr. Wheeler, my boss, says as he passes me. "Tomorrow, you're going to be on the cash register, so be prepared for that."

"Yes, sir." I nod. I hate working behind the counter. The customers are rude and it's going to be worse since the holidays are coming up. The lines will be endless and I just can’t deal with it.

I go into the back room to grab my bag. "Melody!" Mr. Wheeler calls. "There are a few people that walked in. Go greet them."

"Son of a bitch..." I mumble under my breath, pushing back my black hair. The mall closes in ten minutes. Go home, already....

I force a smile before greeting the guest. "Hello! Do you need help looking for anything?" I study the trio. A girl is wandering the store with a man clinging to her. I'm assuming he's her boyfriend. I feel bad for the poor bastard that tagged along. The other man looks bored.

The girl with dark hair is looking around. "No, we're fine."

"No rush, but we close in ten minutes. Just to give you a heads up." My voice is cheery, but I'm really asking them to leave.

"Thanks." The boyfriend nods. He has some kind of accent. British, I think.

"Ohhhhhhh, Gavin! Look at this!" The girl's eyes sparkle as she pulls a dress from the hanger. "Can't you see me in this? Oooooooohhhhhhh, I want! I'm going to try it on."

"Tabby," The man, Gavin, whines. "You already bought like four dresses that look just like that. Do you really need more?"

"Excuse me," The girl, Tabby, pouts. "Those dresses are completely different! I like this one. Besides, it's not often that I treat myself to a shopping spree."

"You're right, love. You deserve whatever you want!" He taps her nose with his finger.

Oh, they are one of those couples. 

"You guys are so gross." Their friend sighs, shaking his head. He has tan skin like me, short black hair and brown eyes hidden behind black rimmed glasses. He's very good looking, except his "tan" complexion looks like it hasn't seen the sun in months.

"I'll go unlock a dressing room for you." I plaster on a fake smile. I lead the girl to the dressing rooms. "Let me know if you need any more assistance." I unlock the door.

She walks in. Her boyfriend waits by the door loyally.

I walk back into the selling floor store. The couple's friend is leaning on a clothing rack. I walk behind the cash register to prepare for this girl's purchase. The whole store is quiet. It's starting to get awkward. I really hope they leave soon.

The friend starts shuffling through the clothing. The female clothing. "Uh, the men's section is on the other side of the store. Unless you're shopping for a girlfriend?" I ask, studying him.

"Nope, this is for me," the man holds up a pink bandeau. "I'm pretty sure I can rock this. Don't you think so?"

I... I think he's kidding? The man keeps a straight face. Okay, I guess he's not kidding. "Uh, yeah! I think that would look great! But I suggest a more subtle color." Pink is just not his color.

"I'm totally kidding," the man grins, exposing a small gap between his front teeth. "Did you really think I was serious?"

"Uh, yeah?" I tilt my head. Well, what the fuck was I supposed to think?! He looks like he was serious!

The man continues to shuffle through the clothes, silence returning to fill the air. I guess he's not much of a talker.

"So, are you and your friends doing some Christmas shopping?" I ask, trying to keep the conversation going.

"Not really. My friends wanted to come to the mall and they asked me to come along. I thought it was going to be fun." he shrugs.

"Was it not?" I lean on the desk.

He raises an eyebrow at me. "You've seen them, right? They just kinda started dating, so they’re in that disgusting new couple phase. You know, the constant touching, the flirting, and all that stuff." He shakes his head.

"You make it sound like a bad thing. Although, it seems a bit obnoxious, I think it's beautiful."

"Beautiful? It's so distracting. It's hard to get any work done." The man scoffs.

"How?" I narrow my eyes. "Why can't you go to a different room to work?"

"We all share a small office. There are certain projects we can't do unless everyone's there." He answers.

"What do you do?"

"I play video games for a living!" The man smiles.

I snicker. Clearly, he's joking. "No, really. What do you do?"

"No, seriously. Ever hear of Achievement Hunter?" The man pushes up his glasses.

"Nope." I shake my head.

"Rooster Teeth?"

"Do roosters have teeth?" I tilt my head.

"Okay, Red vs. Blue? That's pretty popular. Surely, you've heard of that."

"Nuh uh." I shake my head.

"Wow, you live under a rock." He mumbles. "Well, I play video games. We post the videos and people watch them."

"Must be nice." I nod.

"Living the dream," he answers. "I can't see myself doing anything else."

The couple leaves the dressing room area. "Come on, Ray," The girl (Terra, was it?) calls as they head out the door. "I decided I didn't want it now. I might come back for it."

"Well, enjoy the rest of your evening." The man, Ray, says before going to catch up with his friends.

Ray. Has a nice ring to it.

"Bye." I wave.

The British guy (was his name Gary? I'm not sure) playfully squawks. "Come on, Ray. We don't have all day."

"Shut up!" Ray chuckles as they leave the store.

I shake my head and grab my bag. At least I can go home now.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I drag my feet into my one bedroom apartment. I throw my bag on the floor and step over some of my scattered clothes. I should pick all this up. I’ll do it later.

I wander into the kitchen and throw a T.V. dinner in the microwave. I crack open a cheap beer. It’s not good beer, but it can get the job done. I chug it down and toss the empty can in the trash can. It bounces off the piles of garbage that’s now spilling out of the trash can. I should probable clean that. I’ll take care of it later.

The microwaves beeps, letting me know that dinner is ready. I take out the T.V. dinner and scarf it down. This is a typical night for me. I come home to an empty apartment, eat, and then have a few drinks before bed. Some people probably would love this single life. It gets a bit old after a while. 

I flip on the T.V., cracking open another beer. My favorite movie, He’s Just Not that into You is on. I flip the channel. I can recite this movie, line for line. It usually puts me in a better mood. Why not tonight?

Because I’m tired of being reminded that I’m alone.

I just want a perfect relationship. I want someone to hold me when I’m lonely, someone who likes all the same things I like, someone who can sweep me off my feet, I just want…. Someone…

I sigh and turn off the T.V. I don’t know why today is so bad. Maybe I’ll feel better in the morning. I make my way to my room. I strip off my clothes and settle under the cool sheets. I lay in bed. There’s an empty space next to me. I gotta stop doing this to myself. I know I shouldn't be impatient, but where’s my Mr. Right? I’m twenty thee years old. I’m not getting any younger. Once again, I sigh to myself and eventually manage to fall asleep…

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Working in retail reminds me how much I hate people.

“Excuse me, that’s not the right price! I found this in the half off bin!”

“I need to try this on. Can you unlock a dressing room?”

“Hey! Ma’am, this lady cut in line!”

“I did not!”

This has been my entire morning. A long line of agitated customers, people with coupons, stupid question, and hagglers. Seriously, if people can be this stupid, maybe being single isn't a bad thing.

“Melody, you can go now,” My co-worker, Sadie, taps my shoulder. “I’ll take over the register.” She says, almost reluctantly. She knows exactly what kind of annoyances are in store for her.

“Thank you!” I clasp my hands together. Just in time. I felt like blowing my brains out. “Godspeed, my friend.” I pat her shoulder before sprinting from behind the counter.

I sigh a breath of relief as I exit the store. I bob and weave through the crowds. Yep, November is the worst time to work in retail. Everyone is trying to get their shopping done. I wouldn't mind it so much if people weren't so grumpy. At least I can go home now. Poor Sadie.

I button up my coat and exit the mall. The minute the door open, a blast of cold air bites at my face. Great. It’s cold and I have to wait twenty minutes for the bus to arrive. Things can’t get any worse.

I fucking spoke too soon.

Before I know it, someone bumps into me, causing me to slam into the ground. I feel a sharp pain on my ankle. “What the hell?!” I shout, looking up at the person who bumped into me.

That guy from the store yesterday was standing over me. “Aww, my bad,” He reaches out his hand. “Need any help?” I believe his name was Ray. I find it surprising that I remembered that.

“No!” I huff. I try to stand. The pain in my ankle is too much, causing me to fall back down. “God damn it!” I hiss, holding my ankle. “I think I sprained it.”

Ray shrinks back. “See, this is why I never leave the house. This is some kind of sign.” he mumbles. “Here,” He puts my arm around his shoulder and pulls me up. “You can just lean on me. Let’s get you into the mall.”

“Fuck that! Take me home.” I growl.

“Whoa, why are you mad at me?!” His chocolate brown eyes widen. “What the hell did I do?!”

“This,” I point to my ankle. “Is YOUR fault! YOU ran into ME!” I’m so done with today. I just want to go home.

“It was an accident! Look, I can help you in the mall and get you someone to take you home.” 

“Take me home. Now.” I narrow my eyes at him.

“Fine.” He sighs. “Come on.” He starts leading me to the street. “Man, the new Mario Kart is going to sell out before I can get it…” He sighs. I expect him to lead me to the parking lot, but he stops by the bus stop.

“What are you doing?” I growl.

“I don’t drive. We have to take the bus.” Ray shrugs.

“You’re kidding me?!” This just keeps getting better…

“Nope. I have to get you home somehow, right?”

“My hero.” I roll my eyes.

“Where do you live?” He asks.

“I’ll tell you when we need to get off.” 

“Hehe… That’s a sex joke.” He mutters.

Great. He’s immature. 

“Didn’t we meet before?” Ray asks.

“Kinda. You and your friends came into the store I work. We talked for a bit.” I admit.

“Huh. You remember me? My name is Ray, by the way.”

“It wasn’t that long ago.” I rush out a quick answer. I just want to go home and put some ice on my ankle.

“Yeah, I suppose not.” He answers.

“Can we just stand in silence while we wait for the bus? You didn’t talk this much last night.” Honestly, I love talking and meeting new people. Just not in the mood now.

“Okay, fine. Jeez….” Ray mumbles. “You know, I don’t have to help you. I could just leave you here and go get my game.”

“Fine, then go.” I snap. I can get home myself…. I don’t need help.

Before Ray could either leave or say something, the bus rolls up. “Do you need any help on the steps?” 

If I try to hop up the steps, I’ll fall and injure myself further. I nod in defeat. 

Ray walks me to the bus, still holding my arm around his neck as I use him for support. We wait for everyone to get on the bus. “Okay, I’m going to lift you-”

“Don’t get any funny ideas.” I warn.

“Oh darn,” Ray says in a flat tone. “Don’t worry. I’ll find a way to hide my disappointment.” Ray wraps his arms around my waist and holds me close to him as he lifts me. “Okay, watch your foot. I’m trying but I can’t see very well.”

Ray carries me into the bus and sets me on the closest seat. He drops the money in and then bus starts driving.

“We get off at the next stop. My apartment is a block away from the bus stop.” I explain. I stretch out my leg in front of me.

“Okay,” Ray nods. “So what’s your name?”

“Melody.” I answer.

“Melody,” Ray repeats. “So, how’s that ankle feel?”

“It was fine until you showed up.” I glare. 

“Okay. Yep. Didn’t need this today.” After that, Ray sits back and remains quiet. I take the opportunity to relax. In just a couple of minutes, I won’t have to deal with him anymore.

The bus pulls up to the stop. Ray sighs and stands. “Jump on,” He points to his back as he kneels down. I give him a confused look. “It will be easier if I just carry you there. Just direct me to where we have to go.”

“Sounds fair.” I wrap my arms around his neck. Ray hooks his arms around my legs and we hop off the bus. “Thankyouforhelpingme…” I rush out the sentence.

“What was that? I think I heard you being nice to me?” I can almost picture the smile on his face. “Really, it’s no big deal.” He starts walking in the direction of my apartment. 

“Well, I wouldn’t have known what to do. Of course, I wouldn’t be injured if it wasn’t for you.” 

“Wow, you really like reminding people about their mistakes, don’t you?” Ray says, finally sounding slightly annoyed. 

“Sorry,” I shrug. “My apartment building is the next building. I’m on the second floor.”

Ray walks us in the apartment building. “Couldn’t just live on the first floor, huh?”

“Yeah, because I totally love screwing you over on purpose.” I snap.

“It was a joke. Chill.” He says as we walk up the steps.

“It’s really hard to know when you’re joking.” I retort. “How can anyone stand you? I barely know you and you’ve done nothing but bug the hell out of me!”

“Well, you know what? You have done nothing but bitch and moan about things not going your way. How about a little gratitude to the person who took time out of his day to help you? I fucking gave up a video game to help you! A video game! If you knew me at all, you’d know that’s a huge deal!” Ray says in a stern tone. “Listen to me! You got me arguing! It’s very hard upset me in any way.”

“Well, you could’ve fooled me,” I slide off his back once we reach my apartment. “This is my place. Thanks for your help. I guess.” I mumble. “You know, I’m looking forward to never seeing you again.” 

“Thanks! Same here!” Ray says in a sarcastic tone. He turns around and starts heading out.

“Thank god,” I sigh. I unlock my apartment and wander in. I lean on the wall for support. I try to hop around all the piles of clothing that liter the floor. There’s no use. I get on the ground. It’s much easier to crawl around. 

I crawl to the couch and prop my leg up. “Ah,” I sigh. “Now for some T.V.” Before I can get comfortable, there’s a knock at my door. “What the hell?” I slide off the couch and crawl to the door. Still on the ground, I crack open the door. Ray is on the other side, looking down at me.

“Why are you on your knees?” He snickers.

“What do you want?”

Ray rubs the back of his neck. “Uh, that was the last bus that dropped us off…”

“So? Call a friend.” I snap.

“Yeah, about that….” Ray bites his lip. “My phone died.”

“Here,” without hesitation, I hand him my phone. “Call someone.”

Ray dials a number and waits for an answer. He frowns. “Well, screw you, too, Michael…” He mumbles. “No answer. Let me try someone else.” He dials another number and waits. “Come on, Geoff….” Ray hands back my phone. “Uh… no one answered….” Ray says.

I roll my eyes. “You can come in. But only until someone can pick you up.” I open my front door to let him in.

Ray’s eye widen. He scans the room. “Melody, I think you were robbed!” He says, sounding alarmed.

“Sorry about the mess. I wasn’t expecting anyone. Watch your step.” I crawl out of his way. Ray walks in, cautiously, still studying the room. “Okay, I get it,” I snap. “The place is a mess. Are you always this rude to people?”

“It just took me by surprise,” Without warning, Ray scoops me off the floor. You know, it surprises me that he can even lift me. He looks so scrawny. “You really shouldn’t be crawling like that. Not only is it bad for your ankle, you might get lost in all the trash. Where do you want me to set you down?”

Asshole… “Just place me on the couch.” I try to sound not annoyed. It’s not working. 

Ray closes the door behind him and steps over all the clothes in the floor. He puts me on the couch. I prop my foot up on the coffee table.

“You can help yourself to some food, if you’d like. I don’t have much, though…” I admit. “Make yourself at home.”

“Huh,” Ray scoffs. “If I was at home, the place wouldn’t be a mess.”

“Ha ha. Funny,” I say in a flat tone. My phone begins to ring. It’s a number I don’t recognize. “Friend of yours?” I hand the phone to him.

 “Oh! Gavin!” Ray cheers and answers the phone. “Yo. I need a ride. Can you ask Tabby to come pick me up….? Because I know you’re with her….! Okay…. Okay, cool. Bye.” Ray hands up. “I have a ride home. Thanks for letting me use your phone and letting me come in.”

Ray plops down next to me on the couch. “So…” He twiddles his thumbs. “What do you like to do for fun?”

“Watch T.V. mostly.” I shrug. “There’s not much to do.”

“Wow, you live an exciting life.” he teases. 

“Okay, smart ass, what do you do for fun?” I cross my arms.

“Play video games, of course.” He smiles, revealing that adorable gap again. Adorable? I meant annoying.

“Video games are so boring.” I shake my head.

“Yeah, we really can’t be friends now.” Ray smiles. I think he’s joking. But it’s so hard to tell with him. “But that’s all I really do. I don’t go out much.”

“You don’t? Don’t you like going places? I do.” I hold my head up. 

“I guess I don’t mind. But I’d rather stay at home,” Ray absent mindedly starts folding clothes. “There’s nothing wrong with that.”

“If I had free time, I’d be out. I wouldn’t be home,” I smile. “I love being out and hanging out with people. And stop trying to clean my house.” I slap some clothes out of his hands.

“Eww, what’s wrong with you? You like going out?” Ray laughs. 

“What’s wrong with YOU? You’re such a loner.” I chuckle. 

“I have friends, so I’m not a loner.” Ray argues.

“Are you sure? I don’t know how anyone can stand you.” I smirk.

“Oh, really? You’re not the most pleasant person to be around either.” He smirks back.

I turn slightly towards Ray. “So, what were you doing at the mall today? You were there yesterday. If you don’t like to go anywhere, why were you out two times in one week?”

“There was a game I wanted to get. I decided to take advantage of the deals that are going on because of the holidays.” Ray answers. He curls up on the couch, holding onto his legs. “Eww. I hate the holidays,” I shake my head. “People are so obnoxious around this time.”

“I love them! I get to see my family almost every year. You have any plans for Thanksgiving? It’s tomorrow.” He reminds me.

“Nah. I have the day off of school, but I have to work. Besides, I don’t have any family to see.” I shrug.

Ray’s face drops. “Oh, really?”

I nod. “It’s not a big deal.”

“Uh, so you’re in school?” Ray asks, changing the subject.

I nod again. “I’m a photography major. It’s my last year of school.”

“I hate school, but I suppose that doesn’t sound too hard, right? You’re just pointing a camera and pushing a button, right?” Ray says.

“Wrong,” I shake my head. “There’s lighting, different backgrounds, filters….”I begin to list.

“I have no idea about any of that stuff.” Ray admits. “But it sounds cool. You found something you like to do. That’s good.”

“Wait, are we not annoying each other right now?” I grin.

“Well, it seems that way, but you still piss me off.” Ray laughs.

My phone goes off again. It’s a text from Ray’s friend.

“Looks like they’re here,” Ray stands up. “Thanks for letting me chill here for a bit.”

“No problem.” I feel kinda disappointed. I can’t stand this kid but he’s better company than no one.

“Are you going to be okay? I mean, how is that ankle doing? Do you have anyone to watch you?” Ray asks, sounding concerned.

“I’m fine. It’s not that bad. I’m sure it will be fine by tomorrow.” I shrug. “I would show you to the door but… well, you know.”

“Right,” Ray nods. He heads to the door. Before he leave, he pauses. “Wait, if you don’t have any plans tomorrow, would you like to come over to my place after work? I’m going to have plenty of food.”

“You don’t mind?” I ask as Ray adds his number to my contact list.

Ray returns my phone. “Yeah, I’d love to have you over. I’m going to have some other people over so I think it will be fun.”

“Thanks. I’ll let you know by tomorrow.” I say.

“Alright. Bye, Melody. I hope that ankle feels better.” Ray smiles. He locks the door before shutting it behind him.

I stare at the door. What just happened? I don’t think I’ll go. But I think it was nice of him to invite me. I crawl into the kitchen and grab a beer. Back to the same old thing…..


	2. Thanksgiving

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Melody decides to take up Ray's offer of coming over for Thanksgiving.

“This is so stupid…. This is a bad idea. Everything is stupid…” I mumble to myself, digging through piles of clothes, searching for something decent. I decided to go to Ray’s house, after all. Why I’m going through so much trouble for an asshole I can’t even stand, I’ll never know.

The bus is coming in less than half an hour. I should be out the door, heading to the bus stop now and I’m not even ready. All I thought about today at work was this dinner. I’m not going to know anyone there. Hell, I hardly know Ray. It was nice of him to invite me, though.

I fish out a maroon cardigan, a beige tank top and a pair of black legging. This will do. I slip on a pair of boots. I grab a case of beer, put on my coat, and limp out the door. My ankle is just a bit sore, but it’s nothing bad. I’m still able to walk.

I’m just in time. The bus pulls up as I arrive. I pay the bus fair and take a seat. I don’t know why, but I have an odd mix of excitement and nervousness running through me. I like meeting new people, parties, and food, but I don’t want to mess this up. I don’t even care for the asshole but I still don’t want anyone to have a bad opinion of me. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I take a deep breath before knocking on the door. Ray answers with a smile on his face. “Hey! You’re early!”

I look around as I enter his apartment. Everything is so neat and tidy. I’m almost afraid to touch anything. “Early? Aren’t most Thanksgiving dinners around two or three?”

“Not here. Dinner is around six or seven. Why should Thanksgiving be any different? I’m not an asshole.” Ray closes the door behind me.

“Debatable,” I smirk. “So I brought a case of beer. I figured I’d bring something.” I hold up the case.

“Thanks. The guys would have appreciated it. Go ahead and place it in the fridge.” Ray nods. The kitchen is right by the door. I follow him and place the case in the refrigerator.

“Would have?” I repeat.

“It’s just going to be me, you and my friend Dustin will be eating dinner. Everyone else had plans.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine. I invited a bunch of people from work, but they already had plans with their families. Besides, we don’t really talk much outside of work, anyway.” Ray shrugs. “I was just playing Destiny. Come sit and watch.” Ray sits at a desk. He pulls another chair next to him for me. I sit down as Ray slips on a pair of headphones. “Sorry about that. Just letting a friend in.” Ray says. But… to who?

“Uh, Ray, who are you talking to?” I tilt my head.

“I’m talking to the viewers. See,” Ray points to a camera. “I’m streaming live right now.”

“Oh,” It’s weird. It’s just me and Ray, but there are other people watching. “Sorry, should I get out of your shot?”

“Nah, you’re fine. Want to help me out? Can you manage the chat? Just look through and see if any questions or interesting comments pop up.”

“Sure.” I nod.

“Looks like you caused the chat to blow up,” He laughs. “Melody, you want to introduce yourself? Every fucking comment is about you.”

“Uh, I’m Melody,” I turn to Ray. “I don’t know what else to say.”

“Haha! This is her first time on a live stream. Let’s be nice to her, promise? Who am I kidding? You’re all assholes.”

“That’s so mean!” My eyes widen. How can he say something so rude about people that watch his streams?!

“They know I’m kidding!” Ray defends. He turns his attention to the audience. “You know I love you all, right?”

Comments start pouring in.

_No._

_He’s so mean!_

_We hate Ray. I don’t know why I’m still watching._

“Fuck you guys!” Ray laughs.

I continue scrolling through the comments.

_Ray, she’s a pretty thing. Hell, I’d do her._

_Nice Ray!_

_Are you dating?_

_OMG RAY I LOVE YOU!_

_$10 says that the chick and Ray are boning._

“Uh, Ray,” I clear my throat. “People want to know how we know each other. They think we’re dating.”

“Oh! Right. How could I forget?!” Ray smiles, not taking his eyes off his game. “Melody is my girlfriend. We’ve been dating for a couple of months.”

“You’re a liar!” I shout, my cheeks turning red.

“Relax! Melody and I are just friends.”

“If that’s what you wanna call it, sure…” I mumble.

“Okay, well apparently, Melody hates me. Anyway, we met yesterday. I owe her one, so I invited her to my house.”

“You don’t owe me anything.”

“I hurt your ankle. You said it was my fault, right?”

“I suppose.” I shrug.

A beeping noise from the kitchen catches my attention. “Perfect timing! I’m done with this match and the food’s ready. Well, I’ll probably stream next week so I’ll send out a tweet about that. Until next time, bye!” Ray cuts the stream. “TURKEY TIME!” Ray shouts, dashing into the kitchen.

“So you can cook?” I follow him.

 Ray takes out the food in the oven. “No, but I can follow directions on the back of packages. Voilà!” Ray holds out a tray of… chicken strips?

“What the hell is this?” I glare at the tray in front of me.

“Turkey fingers! You know, it’s like chicken fingers, except it’s totally different!” Ray grins. He looks so proud of himself. “I found them in the freezer aisle.”

“Wow. Lucky you.” I say in a flat tone.

“I know! I got mac and cheese and fries for the side dish! I really put a lot of thought into this.”

“Oooooohh, I can tell.” I say in a sarcastic tone.

Ray frowns, putting the tray on top of the stove. “I did the best I could. This is my first Thanksgiving that I couldn’t afford to fly home. Sorry it’s not up to your standards.”

“Wait,” I sigh. I’m being a jerk. “I’m sorry. Everything looks great. I’m being insensitive.”

“It’s fine… Hey, Dustin won’t be here for another hour. He doesn’t care if we get started. Let’s eat!” Ray places everything on the table. 

I grab a plate and start filling it with food. “I’m going to grab a beer. Want one?” I ask, heading for the fridge.

Ray shakes his head. “Nah. I don’t drink.”

“Oh,” I frown as I grab a beer. He doesn’t drink? What’s wrong with him? I sit across from Ray at the table. “So, how does this work? It’s been years since I’ve been to a Thanksgiving dinner.”

“Well, we can just eat. I suppose we don’t have to do anything. But typically, people would pray or whatever and then go around the room and say what we’re thankful for.” Ray answers.

“Oh! Let’s do that last one!” I clasp my hands together.

“Say what we’re thankful for? Sure. You’re my guest so if that’s what you want, we can do that,” Ray nods. “Do you want to go first?”

“Okay! Hmmmm…..” I chew on my lips. What am I thankful for? My life is pretty dull. The most exciting thing that happened to me is meeting Ray, and he’s a pain in my ass. “You know what, you go first. I need a moment to think.”

“Okay,” Ray sits up straighter. “I’m thankful for my family, my friends, my job, and meeting you.”

I snap my head up in his direction. “Me?!” I squeak.

Ray smiles and nods. “Yeah. It doesn’t seem like much, but I’m glad I met you. I can always use more friends.”

“Since when did we become friends?” I giggle.

“Fine then,” He laughs. “Stop eating my food and get out of my apartment!

“Noooo! I’ll be nice! I promise!” I grin. Weird. I can’t stand him, yet I’m thankful for meeting him, too. Come to think of it, he’s not that bad. “I’m thankful for you, too, Ray.”

“Oh, well now you fucked up,” Ray smiles. “Now that I know you can somewhat tolerate me, you’re stuck with me. I’m like a stray dog. Give me a bit of attention, then you can’t get rid of me.”

“That’s fine.” I say in between bites of turkey fingers.

“So, you said this is your first Thanksgiving dinner in years?” Ray asks.

I nod. “Yeah. My freshman year of high school, I met this girl and we became friends. She invited me to her house for Thanksgiving. It was really nice. The house was full of laughter and love,” I pause to take a drink. “I missed having that in my life… My parents died when I was in middle school. Some kind of car accident….” My voice trails off. I never really talk about my parents… I love my aunt and uncle and all, but I didn’t stay there long. As soon as I was able to provide for myself, I was out. 

Even though they weren’t my biological family, they were all I had.

“I’m sorry.” Ray says, snapping me out of my thoughts.

“It’s fine.” I shake my head. “Sorry I dumped all that on you! It’s so unlike me!” 

“No, it’s okay, really! I don’t mind. I like listening to people talk.”

“Perfect, because I love to talk.” I joke, lightening the mood.

“Well, I’m not much of a talker, but I will say this, I really am glad I met you.” Ray continues.

“Really? Why is that?” I ask.

“Well, I have friends. But I don’t really get to see them too much. We’re all too busy with work. And all my friends at work, I don’t see them outside the office. I pretty much stay home alone.”

That sounds a lot like me.

 “And on top of that, most of my friends are in relationships. I guess what I’m trying to say is,” Ray continues. “I’m tired of being reminded that I’m alone.”

That…. Sounds exactly like me.

“Anyway, I’m glad that I met you because now I have another friend. Maybe this time, I won’t be so alone.” Ray finishes.

“Don’t worry,” I promise. “Even though you annoy me, you will never be alone again.”

Ray smiles, showing that cute gap between his teeth. I feel my cheeks growing warm. He’s supposed to be an annoyance. So why am I so happy to be around him?

A knock on the door causes us to snap out of our stares. I realize we’ve just been smiling at each other for that longest time.

“That must be Dustin.” Ray says, getting up from his seat. Ray opens the door, and a man, taller than Ray with sandy blonde hair and green eyes step into the apartment.

“Yo!” The man pats Ray on the back. “Did I miss anything?”

“Dustin, this is Melody. Melody, this is Dustin.” Ray introduces us.

Dustin raises an eyebrow at me. “Well, hello there,” He pulls a chair next to me. “It’s nice to meet you.”

My heart races as Dustin slides an arm around me. “Um, hi.”

“Dustin, stop being a creep.” Ray rolls his eyes. “Can you not try and bang every girl I bring over?”

“I’m just being nice.” Dustin shrugs. He removes his arm from around me.

“Melody, that’s code for “I want to get in your pants”. Be careful.” Ray warns.

“’Kay!” I nod.

“Aww, man, not cool.” Dustin shakes his head. “Where’s the grub?”

The more I look at Dustin, the cuter he appears.

“So, how did you and Ray meet?” Dustin asks me.

“We met at the mall.” I leave out the part where Ray totally body slammed me into the ground.

“Really? Ray, you left the house?” Dustin booms with laughter.

“Ha ha. You’re so funny.” Ray says in a flat tone. “Anyway, Melody is really cool.”

“She’s cute, too.” Dustin adds. “Don’t you think so?”

I blush. No one ever calls me cute. I never get this kind of attention.

“Of course she’s cute,” Ray crosses his arms. “But knock it off. You’re going to embarrass her. She already knows she’s cute. You don’t have to keep drawing attention to it.”

“No, really, it’s fine!” I flip my hair. “A girl can appreciate a compliment here and there.”

“Really, I think-” Ray tries to protest.

“Dude, she’s fine. Lighten up, Ray.” Dustin says as he sits next to me.

“Yeah, Ray,” I grit my teeth. “Lighten up.” Why is he doing this? I’m an adult. I can handle myself. Besides, this Dustin guy is cute. He may be the solution to my loneliness. 

Ray rolls his eyes. “Fine. Whatever.”

“So, gorgeous,” Dustin turns his attention to me. “How did someone like you suddenly want to hang out with Ray?”

“Oh, Ray’s a cool guy. Besides, at least I got to meet you.” Yes! I still got it!

“Oh, barf.” Ray groans.

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say Ray is getting jealous.” Dustin teases. 

I look across the table to Ray. Is he jealous?

“I don’t care, dude.” Ray shrugs.

Oh. Of course not. What was I thinking? Doesn’t matter to me, anyway. I’ll take his friend. Dustin is really hot.

But you know, Ray isn’t bad either. In fact, he’s really cute.

“Can we finish dinner? I want to kick some ass in Halo.” Ray continues to chew his food.

“Sweet! Sounds good to me!” Dustin starts shoveling down the food.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After dinner, place our dishes in the sink and the boys start playing video games. I sit on the couch, with my fifth beer and try to follow what’s going on. Dustin occasionally brushes his knee against mine. Not that I mind. It lets me know that he hasn’t forgotten that I’m in the room. 

“Dude, it’s getting late. I better head home.” Dustin stretches. “You need a ride home, Melody?”

“Nah. I can take the bus. I want to help Ray pick up.” I shake my head.

Ray and I walk Dustin to the door. “Okay, well maybe I can take you out sometime? Try to get to know you better?”

“I’d love that.” I scribble down my number and give it to him.

“Great. I’ll text you. Bye!”

“Bye Dustin.” Ray slams the door in his face.

“Asshole.” Dustin playfully shouts through the door.

“You didn’t have to stay if you didn’t want to.” Ray says as we head for the sink. “I could have taken care of this.”

“I wanted to stay. Besides, I feel bad about yesterday. I did jump down your throat a lot.”

“Well, I’m happy you’re here.” Ray says in a quiet voice.

“So,” I reach for another beer. I still have my buzz, but it’s not enough for me. “What’s Dustin like?”

“Really? Another beer?” Ray shakes his head. “Go on a date with him and find out.”

“But you’re his friend!”

“Fine, you wanna know?” Ray sighs.

I nod.

“He’s a bit of a player. He’s a cool guy, but he jumps from girl to girl.” Ray says as he washes the dishes. “Want to dry?”

“A player, huh?” I start drying the dishes. “Perfect. Just my type.”

“What?” Ray raises an eyebrow.

“Players are fun! They leave before things get messy. And occasionally, I can turn a player into a decent guy. Maybe Dustin will change.”

“Wow. So you’re one of those girls, huh?” Ray scoffs.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I growl. Great, I knew we were getting along too well. It was only a matter of time before he started pissing me off again.

Ray sighs. “I didn’t mean it like that… What exactly are you looking for? What do you want out of this?”

“It depends. If this is just a fling, I’ll be okay. If it turns to something more….” I pause. “I guess I wouldn’t mind having a serious relationship.”

“Just don’t get hurt, okay?”

“Why is that?” I turn to him. Why does he care?

“Well, we’re just becoming friends. If someone gets hurt, I don’t want to have to take sides. Please, just be careful.” Ray mumbles.

I wrap my arms around his neck, giving him a side hug. “Thanks for looking out for me!”

“Ew, you’re hugging me. Don’t do that.” Ray shrugs me off, laughing. “Girls are scary. Don’t you have cooties or something?”

“You’re such a jerk.” I shake my head.

“I’m kidding! Don’t take me so seriously!” Ray turns to hug me back, getting his wet, soapy hands on the back of my outfit.

“Ew! You’re getting me all wet!” I struggle to get away from him.

“I know you want me, but calm down!” Ray laughs harder.

“Fucking idiot.” I growl. I reach for the faucet and pull it from the sink. I hold down the lever to spray Ray.

“Ah! You bitch!” He laughs, throwing his arms in front of him to shield the water. Ray grabs the faucet and turns it on me.

“No!” I shout through a fit of giggles.

Ray laughs maniacally as he douses water everywhere. “Give up?”

“Never!” I shout, grabbing a bottle of dish soap. I squeeze my eyes shut as I blindly aim the bottle of soap.

“Ahh! Watch it!” Ray shouts. Suddenly, I feel my feet leave the ground. I open my eyes. Ray managed to knock the bottle out of my hands and now he’s holding me in his arms. My heart pounds in my chest. Being held close to someone feels nice. “Ha! Now what!” He grins.

“Okay! You win!” I giggle. “Now put me down!”

Ray sets me on the ground. “Fuck,” He looks around the kitchen. “I think now we’ve created more of a mess to clean.” He chuckles.

“Here, let’s get this over with.” I smile. I usually hate cleaning, but with Ray, I guess I don’t mind it as much.

We finished mopping and drying up all the soap and water.

“Ah, fuck.” I sigh, looking at the time. “I think I missed the bus.”

“Oh,” Ray says, noticing how late it’s gotten. “Hey, it’s no problem. Want to stay here? The couch is always available.”

“Thanks.” I nod.

“No problem. I owe you, remember?” Ray says as he walks into the bathroom. He comes back with two towels. “We should probably dry off. You’re more than welcome to take a shower.”

“I don’t trust you,” I stick my tongue out. “You might have hidden cameras.”

“Don’t flatter yourself,” Ray shakes his head, still smiling. “I’ll go grab some clothes for you to sleep in.” Ray retreats to his room. He comes back and throws some black basketball shorts and a green shirt with an X on it. “I like you so much, I trust you to wear my X-Ray shirt.”

“X-Ray? What the hell?” I tilt my head.

“It’s a work thing.” He wave his hand.

I walk into the bathroom. “I’ll be out in a second.”

“If you’re taking a dump, turn on the sink. I don’t wanna hear it!” Ray shouts through the door.

I shake my head. I peel of the soggy clothing off my body. I use the towel the dry off. I feel comfortable around Ray. Maybe it’s a good thing I ran into him… I mean, he ran into me.

I throw on Ray’s clothes. The shorts are super comfy. 

I walk out of the bathroom. Ray is already changed into some pajamas and laying on the couch. “That was quick.” Ray comments as I close the door behind me.

“Well, it doesn’t take long to change clothes.” I shrug. I use the towel to cover my hair.

Ray shakes his head. “That’s not how you dry long hair.”

“Leave me alone. It’s my hair.” I roll my eyes.

Ray sits up. “Sit in front of me on the floor.” Ray pats the front of the couch. I don’t see the point in this. I do as I’m told. I sit on the floor, directly in front of Ray. My back rests on the couch. Ray takes the towel and starts massaging my head. 

With the slight buzz I have, this feels really nice. “I remember my mom used to do this for me when I was little.” I close my eyes, enjoying the relaxing motion of Rays’ fingers massaging my scalp.

“Really?” Ray asks. “You miss her a lot?”

“Duh.” I chuckle. “I remember the first night Mom and Dad brought me from the adoption center. I was really nervous. After my bath, Mom dried my hair like this, gave me a snack before bed, then I didn’t feel as scared. I felt like… I was home.”

“They sounded really nice.” Ray comments. “So, you were adopted?”

“Mm hm.” I hum. “Am I boring you?”

“Nope.” Ray finishes the massage and wraps my hair up in the towel. 

“Why are you so good at this?” I feel my eyes starting to get heavy. A head massage was the only thing to help me sleep as a child. I guess it still works on me.

“I had a few step sisters growing up. I used to help my Mom out around the house.” Ray answers.

“Cute. Must be nice to have siblings.” I yawn.

“You can have mine,” Ray chuckles. “You sound really tired.”

“Just a bit.” I find it hard to keep my eyes open. I slump over to the closest thing to me to use as a pillow.

“Well, let’s not fall asleep on my leg,” I feel Ray get off the couch and lifts me. After a few steps, I’m being set down. He said I was sleeping on the couch, but this feel way to comfortable to be a couch. A blanket is being put over me. “See you in the morning.” 

For whatever reason, I’m too tired to even respond.


	3. Clueless

I open my eyes with ease the next morning. I must have had a good sleep. I feel so well rested. I sit up. I’m lying in a bed. I thought he placed me on the couch? I guess he let me sleep in his bed. How thoughtful.

I look over to the alarm clock on the night stand. It’s 11: 30.

11:30?! On Black Friday?! I’m fucking dead!

I rip the covers off of me and race into the living room. Ray is snuggled up on the couch.

“You didn’t bother to wake me?!” I shout.

Ray jolts up. He rubs his eyes. “Huh?”

I swipe my phone off the counter. There are twenty three missed calls from work, five voice mails, and seven texts from Sadie. “Oh no oh no oh no….” I groan. “I’m so fucking fired…” I pace the floor.

“Melody, what’s wrong?”

“Look at the time!” I point to the clock.

Ray looks up and shrugs. “So? Go back to sleep.” Ray lays back down.

I stomp over to him. “I was supposed to be at work at five this morning! It’s Black Friday! Do you realize how busy Black Friday is for the mall?!” I rant. “I’m dead! More than dead! I’m soooo fired!” I rush to where my clothes are drying. They’re still a bit damp. “Damn it! You couldn’t throw them in the dryer?!”

“Hey, we were both tired! I wasn’t thinking.” Ray finally gets off the couch. “Here, you can borrow something of mine.”

“God! You are the worst!” I growl.

“Whoa, back up! What did I do?” Ray snaps. “It’s not my job to wake you up for work! You never even mentioned that you worked today!”

“It should have been obvious! You met me at work! You SAW I worked in the mall! Working in retail usually consists of working on Black Friday!” I argue.

“I still fail to see how this is my fault! I didn't do anything wrong!” Ray retorts.

“You failing to see what you did wrong? Gee, that’s a surprise.” I scoff.

“I’m just trying to help! How about showing a little gratitude?!” Ray throws his hands up. “God, you are such a spoiled little brat! We were getting along just fine yesterday and now you’re back to bitchy Melody! You know what, maybe that’s how you are! Maybe you’re cool one day and then the next we can’t stand each other! Remind me to stay away from you every other day.” Ray shouts.

“God, I fucking hate you.” I growl.

“Yeah, same!” Ray says. “Jeez, how is it that you manage to piss me off? I don’t argue with people!”

“Really? It seems that’s all you ever do with me!”

“You started it!”

“I can’t do this now. I have go get to work.” I shake my head. He is unbelievable. This is clearly his fault.

Ray retreats into his room. He slams the door. Great. I pull out my phone and started listening to the voice mails.

_“Hey Melody, it’s Mr. Wheeler. Uh, the sale started about ten minutes ago. I guess the bus is running a bit late. No worries. Just give me a call back.”_

Crap. I listen to the next one.

_“Melody, it’s your boss again. You’re really late today. Is everything okay? You’re usually here early. Give me a call back.”_

I click on the next message. 

_“Okay, I know we have more than enough employees today, but being three hours late is inexcusable. Unless you’re dying. Wait, are you dying? Please call us back. Or better yet, just come straight to work. It’s starting to pick up a bit.”_

I have two more messages. 

_“You know what, Melody. It’s been six hours. Don’t even bother coming in. Don’t bother even showing up to work again.”_

God, what could the last message possibly say?! I already lost my job!

_“Heeeey…. It’s Mr. Wheeler. Remember what I said about not bothering to come back to work… We are getting our asses handed to us! Melody, please! I need my top employee! I don’t care what’s going on. Please hurry. We will talk about your tardiness later.”_

That was the most recent voice mail. Hopefully, the bus will be there by the time I run to the bus stop.

I scroll through my texts from Sadie.

_Sadie: Are you coming to work?_

_Sadie: I have some funny stories for you when we go on break._

_Sadie: Dear god where are you?!_

_Sadie: Oh lord, some lady just body slammed a man for some tank tops._

_Sadie: So Mr. Wheeler made me clean the rest rooms and someone took a shit on the floor… Omg you owe my big time for this!_

_Sadie: Lady! What happened to you?!_

_Sadie: Okay, I love you and all, but you are not my favorite person right now._

I sigh as I put my phone down. Out of all the days to sleep in, it had to be today? Sadie is going to kill me.

Ray comes out of his room. “Here,” He says as he hands me clothes. “This will probably fit you. Let me walk you to the bus stop.”

“No,” I scoff. “Stay away from me. I’ll have to handle this myself.” I rush into the bathroom and slam the door behind me.

“Melody,” Ray knocks on the door. “Come on, why are you so angry at me?”

I quickly strip off my sleeping clothes and put on the new clothes. The jeans fit surprisingly well. As I slip on the white shirt, the scent of…. Something. I find it really hard to describe a boy’s scent. The closest thing I can think of is fresh apples? I’m not quite sure, but it’s relaxing. I can’t be comforted by this. I’m still pissed at Ray. Him and his nice smelling shirts.

I rip open the door and Ray is still standing there. I push past him. “Melody, wait.” Ray begs.

“No. Just leave me alone.” I shake my head as I slip on my boots. I put on my coat, and walk out the door.

Ray follows right behind me. “Melody-”

“Just stop! Why are you still following me?!” I growl.

“I want to help!” Ray speeds up to catch up to me. 

“How can you help?!”

“I don’t know! But I want to try!” Ray insists.

“Just walk me to the bus and then go back home.” I mumble.

We arrive to the bus stop right on top. I rush on the bus and take a seat. Ray plops down next to me.

“What?!” I shout.

“Nothing,” Ray shrugs. “I have somewhere I need to be.”

“Like where?!” I cross my arms.

Ray gulps before answering. “I love the mall. Shopping. Yaaaaaaaay.” Ray says with forced enthusiasm.

“You’re a fucking liar and you know it.” I sigh as I sit back in the seat. I don’t feel like arguing with him.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The bus rolls up to the mall. “Wow,” Ray says. “Third time I’ve been to the mall. This is a record.”

 I don’t even pause to say goodbye to Ray. I hop off and dash to Krator’s (the store I work at.) I hear Ray trying to call me back, but I don’t care. I have to get to work.

Once I reach the store, there’s a large crowd of people.

“Melody!” I hear Sadie’s voice somewhere in the sea of people.

I push through the crowd. Mr. Wheeler steps in front of me. “There you are! What happened?!”

“I’m so sorry, sir. I-”

“Melody!” A voice pants behind me. Ray staggers to me. He’s out of breath. “Damn, it’s so hard keeping up to you. That’s enough exercise for the week.”

“Ray,” I grit my teeth. “What are you doing here?”

“You ran away before I could thank you, miss.” Ray nods to me. He turns to Mr. Wheeler. “Sir, this young lady is a hero.”

“What the hell are you talking about?!” I shout.

“Please, don’t be so modest! Mister, she saved my life. She pulled me out of a burning building. She’s late because of me. She stayed with me while I was at the hospital. Thank you so much.” Ray says.

What?

“Melody,” Mr. Wheeler says with wide eyes. “That’s incredible!”

I sigh. “Sir, I-”

“You don’t have to explain,” Mr. Wheeler interrupts. “I’m proud of you. But for now, let’s get back to work.” He says as he walks away.

Ray has a wide grin on his face. “Look! It worked! I helped!” He cheers.

“How you managed to pull that crap, I’ll never know. But…. Thank you…” I mumble.

“Any time.” Ray nods. “Now, while I’m here…” Ray trails off as he walks away. I shake my head and dive right into work.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Well, you didn’t get many hours, but you got us through the worst of it,” Mr. Wheeler explains. “You’re free to go, Melody. Think of it as a reward for saving someone’s life.”

“Gee, thanks.” I try my best to smile. Honestly, I kinda hate Ray for making that up. But at least I still have my job. “See you on Monday!”

“Hold it.” A voice says in front of me. I turn to face a very angry Sadie. Her jet black hair falls over one of her eyes. “What the fuck happened to you?!” I can almost feel her icy blue eyes burn through me.

“I’m sorry?” I shrug. “I made it eventually.”

“Whatever. Let’s go to a bar. I need a drink. I need something to make me forget home shitty people were today. I had to actually work.” Sadie shook her head. “Can you, like, not disappear like that again?” She sighs as we walk out of work together. “This had to be the worst day of my life.”

“Can’t. I have to get home,” I start to explain. I stop short when I see a familiar little annoyance sitting on a bench. “Ray?” I stop in front of him.

“Hey! I got a game!” Ray holds up a Game Stop bag.

“Good for you. Why are you here?!” I cross my arms. I’ve had enough of him today.

“I wanted to see if you wanted to come play it with me! Besides, your clothes are still at my house and I figured they should be dried off by now.”

I feel Sadie jab my side with her elbow. “Whoa,  _friend_  of yours?”

“He’s a friend, but I think you’re getting the wrong idea.” I quickly dismiss the thought. Me and Ray? No thanks. Well…. No, I’ll stand my ground. No thanks. “Sadie, this is Ray. Ray, this is my work buddy Sadie.” I introduce them.

Ray instantly fixes on Sadie. “Hello.”

“Hi,” She reaches out her hand. “It’s nice to meet you.”

Ray shakes her hand. His lips curl into a warm smile. I don’t know why, but I don’t like this. I don’t like the way Ray is smiling at her. Sure, Sadie is cute… You know, if you like that scene look. But I don’t think Ray would go for someone like her… Wait, what am I saying? I’m getting paranoid. They just met. Nothing to worry about here.

Not that I have anything to be worried about, anyway…. Someone is judging me out there, I know it.

“Ray,” I clear my throat, breaking their eye contact. “You didn’t have to wait for me.”

“I didn’t mind. Besides, I wanted to see if everything was okay. You were freaking out pretty badly.” Ray shrugs.

“Was not!” I argue.

“Ah, typical Melody.” Sadie laughs.

“So, she’s always like this? Great.” Ray chuckles.

Hey, don’t do that. Don’t start bonding over my flaws. I don’t like it. Stop it.

“So, anyway, did you both want to come over? I have enough Wii remotes for all of us to play.” Ray offers.

“Thanks, but I had a long day and I just really want to go home and sleep. Besides, I’m not a big gamer.” I shake my head. Fuck you, Ray. I’ve had enough of you today.

“Um, I’d love to come over. If that’s okay. I love video games. That’s the new Super Smash Bros, right?” Sadie jumps in.

“Hell yeah! I did invite you. It’s perfectly fine,” Ray nods. He turns to me. “Are you sure you don’t want to come over? You can at least pick up your clothes.”

“I suppose I can do that…” I answer, reluctantly. I just want to go home… So, why don’t I just go home? “Sadie, do you mind driving us? Ray doesn’t have a car.”

“Not a problem! I parked this way.” Sadie starts directing us to her car.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Once we get to Ray’s apartment, Ray and Sadie instantly start setting up the game. “I can’t fucking wait!” Sadie beams with excitement.

“Me either!” Ray says. “Who are you going to play as first?”

“I don’t know. Let me see what’s available.” Sadie hums.

I close the door behind me. They’re in their own little world. It’s like they forgot I was here. I collect my clothes. “So do you want your clothes back?” I say, trying to get his attention.

“Hm? Oh, no. You can just keep those. They suit you better, anyway.” Ray answers, not looking up from the game console.

“Okay, well, I got what I need. I’ll go wait for the bus now.” I say a little louder. No answer. “Yeah, I’m heading out now.”

“Huh?” Ray snaps his head up. “Aww, you’re really going to leave? Stay a bit! It doesn’t make sense to come over here for clothes and then wait for the bus.”

“Yeah,” Sadie finally turns her attention to me. “We never get to hang out outside of work. I’ll drive you home. Don’t worry about it.”

I take a deep breath before answering. “Okay. Sure.”

“Yay!” Three voices cheer. Wait, three? Ray, Sadie, and… Dustin? When did he get here?

“Dustin?!” Ray jumps, looking as surprised as I am. “What the fuck are you doing here?”

“I just walked in! Why didn’t you tell me there was a party?” Dustin frowns.

“I’d hardly call this a party.” I chuckle. “Hey, Dustin.”

“Ah, doll face! You remembered me!” He smiles.

“Hard to forget a cute face like that.” I comment.

I hear Ray scoff. “Okay, turning my attention to video games now.”

“Hello!” Sadie waves. “I’m Sadie.”

“Oh, sorry. I’m Dustin.” He nods. “So, Melody, it’s good to see you again. What’s new?”

“Ray made me late to work.” I glare in Ray’s direction. Ray is too busy playing that game with Sadie.

“What a jerk,” He shakes his head. “How did he do that?”

“He didn’t wake me up for work.” I answer.

“Oh, did you stay the night here?” Dustin’s tone changes a bit.

“Well-” I start to answer. 

“Oh, that’s bullshit!” Ray shouts as he laughs. 

Sadie throws her hands in the air. “I win!”

“Not yet! I still have one more life!” Ray says as he knocks Sadie’s character off the map. “Now I win! Close match, though.”

“Damn it! I had you!” Sadie mumbles.

“Another round? Dustin, you want in?” Ray turns around to face us.

“Nah, man. I broke in to see if you wanted to grab a bite to eat. I’m starving.” Dustin says, leaning back on the couch. “Melody, you should come, too!”

“I’d love to!” I nod. I turn to Ray. “Are you coming?”

“Nah,” Ray waves his hand. “I really want to play this some more. You all go ahead.”

“Can I stay, too?” A slight blush creeps over Sadie’s face.

No.

“Sure!” Ray nods. “I need a Smash Bro. buddy.”

“Dustin, if you want to stay and play a bit, I don’t mind waiting.” I offer. Almost too quickly.

“Nah, we can get food now. Let’s go.” Dustin stands. “Besides, I can kick Ray’s ass in that game another day.”

“You wish, bro.” Ray chuckles. 

“Before we start the next round, may I have a drink?” Sadie asks.

“In the fridge.” Ray answers.

Dustin starts walking out the door. “Melody, you coming?”

“Just a sec. I’ll meet you out there.” I say as I follow Sadie into the kitchen.

“’Kay.” Dustin says before walking out.

Once we are out of earshot, I tug on Sadie’s arm. “Why do you want to stay here?”

“I like video games.” She shrugs.

“But you don’t know Ray. Are you sure you’re okay staying with him?” I cross my arms. I’m not mad, so why do I sound like it?

“He’s your friend. So I’m sure he’s not going to kill me.” Sadie answers.

“You know,” I shuffle my feet. “If you want me to stay here with you, I can. I don’t mind. I can go out with Dustin another time.” I offer.

“I’ll be fine. Being alone with Ray doesn’t freak me out. Go enjoy your first date with that guy,” Sadie lets out a lighthearted laugh. “Besides,” She peeks into the living room towards Ray. “He’s really cute. I wouldn’t mind some alone time with him.” She raises her eyebrows.

Oh. I see what’s going on here. “Oh, then I guess I’ll leave you to… whatever this is.” I wave my hands.

“Great,” She winks. “I’ll tell you everything! Who knows? Maybe we can go on double dates and stuff!”

“Yaaaaaay.” I add with fake enthusiasm. 

“Sadie, can you grab me a bottle of water while you’re in there. If you don’t mind.” Ray calls from the living room.

“No problem!” Sadie answers. She turns her attention to me. “Now go before your date gets impatient!” Sadie shoos me away.

I make my way to the door. So Sadie is going to try to get to know Ray? Well, I suppose that’s good. Ray is a nice guy…

“Leaving?” Ray asks as my hand touches the door knob. I turn around. Ray is looking in my direction. Sadie is behind him, waving for me to leave.

“Uh, yeah.” I nod. “Bye.”

“Later. Have fun with Dustin. Let me know if he starts being a creep.” Ray waves.

I exit the apartment and close the door slowly behind me. I start walking to Dustin’s car. I feel bad just leaving Sadie with Ray. They hardly know each other. I hope Ray doesn’t get awkward around her. And I hope Ray doesn’t annoy the hell out of Sadie. I know how much he bothers me sometimes. 

But then again, we’re still getting to know each other. And I suppose I don’t have to keep talking to him. So, why bother? It’s been about three days and all he’s done is screw me over in some way. Kind of. Maybe I’m just being dramatic.

“Took you long enough.” Dustin teases.

“Sorry,” I hop in the front seat. “I just wanted to make sure my friend was okay being with Ray.”

“You know, they would be kinda cute together! They look good together. And that’s hard to do with Ray.” Dustin smiles. “Anyway, tell me something about you.”

“Hmmm. Well, I’m a photographer and I love meeting new people. That’s a basic rundown about me.”

“Photography is cool. I suck at it, though,” Dustin chuckles. “Maybe you can show me a few tips some time? I always fuck up a picture somehow-” He begins to rant

I lean against the car door, trying to focus on what he’s saying. Ray and Sadie probably won’t last that long. Just because she’s trying to get to know him, that doesn’t mean they’re going to end up together! But even if they do, good for them. It doesn’t really affect me in any way. That’s their business.

Sadie is definitely more relaxed than I am. She’s prettier, more interesting, and I wouldn’t blame Ray if he was interested in her. 

“- And that’s the story of how I almost lost a leg. That was a crazy family reunion.” Dustin snaps me from my thoughts. Man, I must have missed an interesting story.

“That’s so crazy.” I add.

“I know, right? I’m so glad you agree!” Dustin nods. “It’s so hard to get a girl to listen to that story without getting grossed out! You’re so unique.”

“Thanks?” I tilt my head. 

“If you thought that was weird, you’re going to LOVE this!” Dustin starts to ramble again as we get out of the car and head into a small family diner. I wonder how Ray is doing…?

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“See you tomorrow!” I wave goodbye to Dustin as he drives off. He’s a really funny guy. I’m actually glad I went out with him. He managed to get my mind off of Ray. Why is that asshole invading my brain? He better stop it. I’ll yell at him later for it.

As I enter my small, dirty apartment, my phone goes off. I answer without looking at the caller ID. “Hello?”

“OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHH Guess what happened?!” A voice shrieks in my ear. It’s Sadie.

“What?” I sigh.

“We kissed!” 

My stomach drops. “Kissed?”

“Yeah!” Sadie sounds so giddy.

Who kissed who? “So… what kind of kiss are we talking here? Was it like,” I make a small pecking noise. “Or was it like,” I make sloppy kissing noises. “Well?”

“Melody, you know I’d never give too much information out. But I will say he’s a great kisser.” She giggles.

Oh….

“And we’re going to have a first date tomorrow! Isn’t that great! Oh, I hope this goes well.” She sighs. “How was your date?”

“It was okay. Dustin is really nice. I actually have another date tomorrow, too.” 

“Oh! That’s fantastic! I hope this works out for the both of us.” Sadie cheers.

I feel dizzy… “Sadie, I’m starting to feel really sick. I think I ate too much. You can tell me all about the date tomorrow.”

“Oh, okay! Bye! Feel better!” Sadie sings before hanging up.

I stand in front of the door, stunned. They just met. And they kissed? She doesn’t know him! Well… I suppose I don’t, either. But that’s not the point! Twelve hours ago, I had Ray to myself. As a friend, anyway.

I fall to the floor and start sorting through my clothes. I guess it was about time to clean up. 

I still can’t wrap my brain around Ray and Sadie being a couple. Ray did say he was tired of being alone. I understand. I’m in the same boat as him. But he’s that desperate that he’s willing to rush a relationship? 

But now that I think about it, Sadie and Ray do seem to have things in common. I don’t know too much about Ray, but their personalities seem compatible. I guess it makes sense. Ray being with Sadie makes more sense than being with me. Not that Ray ever saw me as a possibility. I don’t know him too well. But there’s something comforting about Ray. I’ll never admit this to him, but I feel at ease around him, when he’s not irritating me.

There’s something about last night… When he was helping me with my hair. I replay that simple moment over and over in my mind. It wasn’t a big deal, but I felt happy. I want more moments like that with him… I like our friendship. I’ll never tell him that, but I like being around him.

Before I know it, I can actually see the floor of my apartment. There are two piles of clothes on the floor; one dirty and the other is clean.I toss my dirty laundry in the bin and collect my clean clothes and head to my room. I start putting the clothes on hangers and start putting them into my closet.

Why am I even thinking about Ray? Dustin should be on my mind. He’s really cute. And he’s very open about his interest in me. I’m flattered. I can’t wait to get to know more about him. 

I step back to look at my room. Everything is in its place. I’ll worry about garbage tomorrow. I take off the clothes Ray let me borrow and change into my pajamas. I leave on the plain white shirt. It’s comfortable. 

I slip into bed and try to go to sleep. This Ray and Sadie thing is screwing with my head. Dustin thinks they look good together. I still can’t see it. 

My phone starts to ring. I look at the caller ID. It’s Ray. I answer instantly. “Hello!”

“Yo,” Ray says, in between crunches. I guess he’s eating something. “How did the date go with Dustin?”

“First of all, have you seen the time? What makes you think it’s okay to call me this late? Secondly, what are you? A worried brother? Why do you care how they date went? And lastly, don’t talk with your mouth full, asshole.” I scold playfully.

“Sorry,” He chuckles. He pauses to swallow. “I wasn’t really thinking. I had a hard time sleeping.”

Yeah, same here…. “Well, since you asked, the date was okay. How was the date with Sadie?”

“I wouldn’t call that a date. We played video games and then we ate pizza. She did kiss me, though. Which was kinda weird.”

HA!  _She_  kissed him! “Oh? A kiss?” I try to sound surprised. “Why is that weird? Is she not your type?”

“I don’t know. She’s definitely hot, I’m not denying that. I just wasn’t into it. Like the making out was cool for a one-time thing, you know? I don’t really kiss strangers. But I guess I still don’t know her too well. So we’re hanging out tomorrow.” Ray answers.

Okaaaay, I could have lived without knowing they made out. “Well, I hope you have fun on your date tomorrow.”

“There’s that word again. I still wouldn’t call it a date,” Ray chuckles. “I’m just seeing where this goes.”

“You better not hurt her,” I warn. “Sadie is a good person.”

“I’m sure she is. But you know, if I’m not interested, I’m not going to force it. It makes no sense to lead someone on if you’re not into them, you know what I mean?” Ray says.

Yeah, that does make sense… “I hear you. People like that irritate me.”

Ray yawns. “I just wanted to call a check on you. You know, I really do feel like a worried parent or something. I didn't hear from you and I couldn't stop thinking about making sure you were okay. Is that weird? Because I mean that in the most non- weird way.”

A smile spreads across my face. He was thinking of me. “That’s not weird at all.” I won’t tell him I had the same thoughts. “But now that you have peace of mind, get some sleep. And text me after that date. I want to hear everything.”

“What am I? A girl? I’m sure Sadie will tell you all about it.”

“True.” I nod.

“But I will text you tomorrow. Goodnight, Melody.”

“Goodnight, Ray.” I say before hanging up the phone. I thought I would feel better after that phone call, but I still feel conflicted about them being together. It’s not my business, so why does it bother me so much? All I can do is hope that tomorrow doesn’t go well for them. That’s wrong, isn’t it? I should be focused on my own date tomorrow….


	4. Double Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Melody is spending the day with Dustin. Unknowing to her, it will just end up as a double date with... well, you can guess who.

I wake up and look around the room. It’s like being in a new apartment. It’s funny how a little cleaning makes a difference. I roll out of bed and check my phone. No messages. Ray and Sadie are probably already hanging out. It’s making me feel a bit lonely. They’re out having an adventure without me and I’m alone. Dustin isn’t coming to get me for another hour. I decide to just get ready early. 

I pause once my hands are on the hem of the white top I’m wearing. I completely forgot I slept in Ray’s shirt. It still has his faint scent… Okay, Melody. Stop being creepy. I peel off the shirt and throw it out of the room. I don’t need to think about that now.

I toss on a green strappy dress with black leggings. After I finish getting ready, I notice I have a text.

_Ray: Okay, time for your ass to wake up and suffer the sun with me._

I smile at the text and reply.

_Melody: Well, good afternoon to you, too. What are you doing?_

_Ray: Sadie wanted to walk around downtown. I hate this. Walking outside? How am I still alive?_

_Melody: You’re texting me DURING your date?! Stop texting!_

_Ray: Relax. It’s not a date, remember? If it was, I would have more decency than to do this._

_Melody: Just pay attention to her._

_Ray: Wah._

Wah? Is that a typo, or is he just being weird? Probably the latter. I shrug and walk out into the living room. Ray’s shirt is just lying in the hallway. I pass it and flop down on the couch and flip on the T.V. Dustin should text me soon. I look back at Ray’s shirt.

Ray…

After a few minutes pass, I get another text. I quickly check my phone, hoping it’s Ray.

_Dustin: Just got out of work. Are you ready?_

My shoulders droop. Not who I was expecting, but okay.

_Melody: Yep! See you soon!_

I jump off the couch to make last minute touch ups, like adding eyeliner and lip gloss. I should be more excited for this date. Dustin is cute. So what’s the problem? Why the hell do I get more excited hearing from Ray than Dustin? God damn it, Ray. Stop ruining shit for me! Ever since you came in my life, you messed me up. I have to hit him next time I see him…

I get a message from Dustin telling me that he’s outside. I button up my fall coat, lock my apartment, and make my way to his car.

“Hello, pretty lady.” He greets me as I slide in the front seat. 

“Hello, handsome,” I smile as I buckle my seatbelt. Forget Ray! This will be an awesome date! “So, what’s the plan for today?”

Dustin starts driving down the street. “I’m thinking we can get lunch. After that, we can figure something out.”

“Sounds good,” I nod. Okay, Melody, time to get pumped. You’re on a date. Make some magic happen. “So how was work?”

“Ugh. It was so shitty,” He groans. “I work at a sports store. It’s not very cool but it’s all I can get right now.”

“So, are you really into sports?”

“Yeah, I was a bit of a jock in high school. I tried to be in as many sports as my schedule would allow.” Dustin nods.

“That’s cool. But I’m guessing that’s not enough now. Well, what would you like to be doing?” I ask.

“I’d say Ray has it pretty good at his job. Playing games for a living? Sign me up!” Dustin grins.

“Yeah, he mentioned that. I didn’t quite understand his job.” God, how the hell did we start talking about Ray?

“But really, I could see myself working as a pediatrician.” Dustin adds.

“You? Really?” I tilt my head. He doesn’t seem like a doctor type.

“Yeah. I may not look like it, but I adore kids. And being a doctor would be cool, right? And I look forward to having a family of my own one day. Of course, I’m not smart enough to become a doctor.”

“Don’t say that,” I hit his arm. “That’s quitter talk.” I’m trying to stay engaged in this conversation, but I find myself checking out. Dustin continues on debating about going back to school.

I wonder what Ray is doing right now…

“We’re here.” Dustin snaps me out of my thoughts. “This place has the best sandwiches.”

“Oh.” I hop out of the car. I need to get my head into this. This is supposed to be a fun date. Don’t ruin this so quickly! 

Dustin holds open the door for me and we walk in. 

“Hey, Melody!” A male voice shouts across the restaurant. I scan the room. I spot Sadie and Ray sitting in a booth. They wave us down.

“Oh, perfect! You don’t mind sitting with Ray, do you?” Dustin smiles. 

My stomach starts doing flips. I bite my lip to contain a smile. “I don’t mind at all.” 

He turns to the host. “We’ll just take two menus and join our friends over at that booth,” Dustin points in the direction of Ray. The host hands us our menus and we walk towards the booth. “How lucky. Maybe we can turn this into a double date.”

Once we approach the table, Dustin steals the spot next to Ray. Sadie takes my arm and pulls me next to her. “I’m so glad to see you! Ray and I were just talking about you.”

My heart begins to flutter. Me? I look at Ray, who’s sitting diagonally across the table from me. “You were?”

Ray opens his mouth to speak, but takes a sip of his soda instead. He darts his eyes away, fixing his stare out the window.

“Yeah! We both agree that you’re such a good friend. I was just telling him about some of the crap we go through at work. I’m telling you, Ray. I wouldn’t be working there if it wasn’t for Melody.” Sadie continues.

Good friend. Of course. They’re on a date. What else would they say about me?

“What have you two been up to?” Dustin asks.

“We were just wandering around town, talking, and getting food, obviously…” Sadie’s voice begins to die out as Ray glances back at me. Sadie and Dustin’s conversation begins to drown out. All I can focus on is Ray.

But why?! All we can do is fight. I hate him and I’m pretty sure he can’t stand me. But if that were the case… why haven’t I been able to stop thinking about him? And… why am I wondering what he thinks about? Does he think about me? Does he actively try to keep his mind off of me, but still manages to find something that reminds him of me? Because I do. Since I met Ray, all my thoughts went to him. And I can’t figure out why.

I find myself getting lost in his brown eyes. If I could just hear his thoughts. If I could just know what he’s thinking right now, I could rest easy. Clearly, he’s thinking about something. He can’t tear his eyes away from me either. If I could just hear one thought…

“Melody,” Dustin waves his hand in front of my face. “Are you still alive?” He chuckles. “It’s your turn to order a drink.”

“Oh, uh, just a water, please.” I place my order with the servers. Yikes. How long did I zone out for? Embarrassing. 

The server rushes off to get our drinks.

“Hmm,” Dustin browses his menu. “Did you guys order yet?”

“Nope,” Sadie answers. “Any suggestions?”

I pick up my menu and drown out Sadie and Dustin once again. I peek over my menu at Ray. Ray’s face his covered by his menu. He slowly lowers it, only revealing his eyes. Ray wiggles his eyebrows.

I stifle a laugh. Nooooo, don’t do this to me!

“You okay?” Dustin peeks over his menu.

“Yeah,” I choke down a laugh. “Just got a tickle in my throat. I just need water.”

Right on time, the server returns with our drinks. We place our orders and the server takes our menus and leaves the table.

I reach for my straw. Ray snatches it before I can take it. “Mine.” He says.

 “Hey, asshole,” I narrow my eyes. “Want to hand that over?”

“Hmm… Do I want to? Nah.” He smirks.

“Fine. I don’t need a stupid straw.” I cross my arms.

Ray tears off the wrapper on one end and places the straw in his mouth. He points the straw at me, and blows off the wrapper. It hits me on the forehead.

“How old are you?” I roll my eyes. Yeah, that whole thing I just said about wanting to know his thoughts? I take it back. I hate him.

“Here, I don’t need it anymore.” Ray grins.

“Immature jerk…” I grumble as I take the straw. Don’t smile. Don’t give into that grin. Damn it! Why is my heart pounding again?!

“So, after lunch, what are we doing, Ray?” Sadie bats her eyelashes at Ray.

“I don’t know.” Ray shrugs as he takes a sip of his drink. 

“What do you want to do, Melody?” Dustin turns to me.

“How about a movie?” I suggest. It’s dark and quiet and Dustin won’t have to talk to me. Wow… I shouldn’t be feeling like that about my date.

“Great idea.” Dustin nods.

“A movie? That’s such a great idea.” Sadie pouts. She glances at Ray.

Ray, not even taking the hint continues to sip on his soda.

“Why don’t you guys come along?” Dustin offers. 

“Yeah! Can we, Ray?” Sadie asks.

“Fine with me.” Ray shrugs.

“Wow, don’t sound too excited.” I say sarcastically. 

“Hey, I said we were coming. What do you want? A parade?” Ray rolls his eyes. “Good to see you, too, by the way.”

I grit my teeth. He irritates me. I thought maybe he thought about me, too. I’m obviously wrong. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Okay, so the next showing for that prison comedy, “Bust Out” is in about an hour. We can get tickets and probably hang around the arcade.” Dustin suggests. 

“Okay.” I pull out my wallet. He paid for lunch, so I should buy our tickets.

“Nope, I got this.” Dustin insists.

Sure. I’ll take any opportunity to save money. How kind. “Thanks, Dustin.”

We pay for our tickets and wander in. “Hey,” Sadie loops her arm around mine. “Walk with me to the bathroom.”

“You know where to find us.” Ray says as he follows Dustin to the arcade.

I walk with Sadie to the bathroom. She peeks to see if we’re alone. “Did you notice?” She asks as she turns to face the mirror.

“Huh?” I tilt my head.

“You know Ray more than I do. Did he seem unresponsive to you?”

“I met him two days before you did. I’m not exactly a Ray expert. What are you talking about?” I cross my arms.

Sadie takes a deep breath. “I’m messing up this date. I know I am. He’s very quiet. He seemed to be more talkative when you and Dustin arrived. Why can’t he be like that around me?” Sadie pouts.

He was talking more around me? Perhaps I put him in a better mood? “Ray is a shy person,” I insist. “He’s not outgoing like we are. He agreed to hang out with you. That’s a good sign.”

“I’m just not too sure. Oh! I know! Dustin is the reason he was talking more! Maybe I’ll ask him.” Sadie’s face lights up.

Right…. It wasn’t me. It has to be Dustin. It makes sense. That is his best friend, after all. “Yeah, talk to Dustin.” I mumble. How stupid of me… Why would Ray be happy to see me?

“I hate to ask, but could you distract Ray while I talk to Dustin? I hate to tear you away from your date…”

“Sure!” I agree almost too quickly. “I don’t mind. Whatever makes you happy, Sadie.”

“Oh, you’re the best!” Sadie squeals. 

Being secretly happy to spend time with my friends date? Nope, I’m a piece of shit.

We walk out to join the boys. We find them already playing a zombie game, competitively.

“You’re not winning this time.” Ray nudges Dustin, trying to knock his gun out of his hand.

“Stop cheating!” Dustin laughs.

“I don’t need to cheat to be better than you.” Ray smirks.

“Hey, Dustin, when you’re done with that, let’s play Dance Dance Revolution match.” Sadie challenges.

“Sounds good. Damn it!” Dustin grumbles after he loses. “Want to come along?”

“Nah, I’m not in the mood to play that. I’ll just keep Melody company.” Ray shakes his head.

“Suit yourself, dude.” Dustin shrugs as he follows Sadie to the other side of the arcade. Finally. It’s just me and Ray.

“Well, let’s look for something. What would you like to play?” Ray scans the arcade.

“Oh, no,” I shake my head. “You can play and I’ll just watch. I suck at games.”

“Then let’s find something easy to start you off,” Ray takes my hand and starts walking. The world seems to dissolve around me. His hand is so warm… “Hmm… how about ski ball? It’s such an easy game,” Ray suggests as he swipes his game card. “Here,” Ray hands me a ball. “Just throw it underhanded. It will roll up the ramp and into a bucket. Try and aim for the buckets with high points.”

“So, are we being civil today?” I raise an eyebrow as we start playing.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. You’re always the one with the attitude.” Ray reminds me.

“That’s not true!” I scold. Ugh… I better change the subject before we start arguing. “How’s the date going?”

“Ha! Date? Yeah, I’m not really feeling it. She’s cool and all, but I can’t really see myself dating her. Remember, I told you I wasn’t going to lead her on. So, I’m going to talk to her about being just friends after today.” Ray explains.

Yes! I had nothing to worry about! That shouldn’t make me happy, but… it does. “That’s a shame. You two seemed cute.” I fake a frown. “But it can’t be helped.”

“Yeah. So, how about you and Dustin?” Ray asks.

I gulp. Dustin is exactly the type I usually fall for. Friendly, charming, athletic, and a complete gentleman. So, why am I not interested anymore? “It’s going… okay.” I lie.

“Just okay?” Ray repeats. “Well, I suppose you still have to get to know him. Do you think it will work out?”

“You know,” I shrug. “We’ll have to wait and see.” Maybe I don’t want it to work out. Maybe I can’t stop thinking about someone else. Oh, that reminds me….

I reach over and smack Ray in his arm.

“Oww! What the fuck?!” Ray flinches.

“No reason.” I shrug. That’s what you get for making me think about you.

“Oww… Why? Anyway, how do you feel about Dustin now?” Ray persists.

“Why?” I ask. Why is this so important to know? Could it be that he really likes me? If I admit that maybe I don’t care for Dustin and I can’t stop thinking about Ray, will things be different?

“You know, you guys are my friends. I’m just looking out for you guys. Plus, I don’t want to be a third wheel.” Ray explains.

Oh, right. Silly me…

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Movie is about to start,” Dustin whispers over the commercials. He checks his watch as we sit in the theater. “Where the hell is Ray?”

Sadie leans over the empty seat between me and her. Why would she let Ray sit next to me? “He’s coming.” Sadie points towards the door. 

Ray shimmies past us to get to the seat next to me. He’s carrying popcorn and a large slushy.

“Didn’t we already eat?” I cross my arms.

“That was an hour ago!” Ray chuckles.

“Unbelievable…” I shake my head.

“I bought enough to share.” Ray holds the box of popcorn in my face.

“I’m still pretty full from lunch,” I stare at the slushy. “What kind is that?”

“Cherry.”

“I’ll share that with you.” I say as I take a sip. The movie begins.

Throughout the movie, Dustin puts his arm around the seat. I glance over to see how Ray and Sadie are doing. Sadie is lying on his shoulder, but his hands are occupied with his phone. Yep. He’s not interested.

I can’t help but be a little relieved.

My phone vibrates in my pocket, catching me off guard. I look around. No one seemed to have noticed. I pull out my phone, trying not to draw attention to myself.

_Ray: You’re drinking all my slushie_

I roll my eyes.

_Melody: Good._

I hear a small snicker from Ray. 

_Ray: Okay, bitch. I see how it is. You owe me._

_Melody: Nope._

_Ray: Nope?_

_Melody: Nope._

_Ray: I won’t stand for this bullying._

My body shakes to prevent myself from laughing. It’s not a funny part of the movie. I can’t laugh right now. Dustin rubs my shoulder. He leans over. “Are you okay?” He whispers.

“Yeah,” I respond. “I’m fine.”

Dustin turns his attention back to the movie. I glare at Ray. He bites his lip, holding back a laugh. Just ignore him. I can make it through this date without embarrassing myself.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“That was such a good movie.” Sadie says as she stretches. 

“Yeah. Melody couldn’t stop laughing.” Ray smirks. Asshole. Stop making me laugh during a movie!

“Yeah, so funny.” I plaster on a fake smile. I swear, I’ll hurt him.

“Well, I’m going to go take Melody home now. It was fun hanging out with you all.” Dustin nods.

“Yeah, we should totally do this again!” Sadie suggests.

Considering Ray doesn’t like you like that, I don’t think that’s going to happen.

We part our separate ways. Once we get in Dustin’s car, he begins to talk. “So, Sadie said something interesting. Apparently, she thinks Ray doesn’t like her.”

“Oh, really?” I fake a surprise voice. It’s kinda obvious that he doesn’t.

“So, I tried to give her a few pointers. I know what kind of girl Ray likes. Odd thing is, he usually goes for girls like that.”

“Huh. Really?”

“Yeah. It’s so weird that he’s not into her. I wonder why that is,” Dustin shrugs. “I guess you can’t really force chemistry.” 

I smile. Yeah, you really can’t. You know, maybe Ray is like me. Maybe he can’t focus on the one he’s supposed to like because he’s thinking about someone else. Maybe that someone is me.

Could Ray and I really be together? What would that be like?

Dustin pulls up to my apartment. I plant a kiss on his cheek. “Thanks for today, Dustin.” I start getting out of the car.

“Can we see each other again?” Dustin rushes out the question.

Hmm… I’ve never met a player that asks to see me again so soon. “I need to check my schedule. Why don’t we come back this later?”

“Yeah,” Dustin’s disappointed tone doesn’t match the smile on his face. “Well, I’ll talk to you later.”

I close the car door behind me and wave. I stop by my mailbox to check my mail. I shuffle through junk mail. I stop at one particular letter.

It’s finally here.

I rip open the envelope, to get to the letter.

_Dear Ms. Melody Larson,_

_We are honored to inform you that you and twenty- nine other applicants have been selected to attend the Young Austin’s Artist Guild study abroad program to Italy this January. You have been specially selected by Professor Samuel Clark, local Austin, Texas native._

That’s it. That’s all I need to read. I’ve been waiting for this for months! Recommended by Samuel Clark himself? This really is a dream!

I skip into the house. Maybe now life can start moving forward. I got into the exclusive study abroad program that I’ve always wanted. Who the hell cares about a stupid boy?!

Well… I still want to tell Ray. But I’ve had enough excitement with him. Time to start figuring out how to pay for the trip of a lifetime.

 


	5. The Celebration

“-Don’t forget your reports are due on Tuesday. Until next class, you are dismissed.” Professor Jan Rowe, my photography II instructor, dismisses the class. “Oh! That, reminds me, our very own Melody Larson was accepted in the study abroad program. She’s the only photographer that got in. Congrats, Melody.” She announces.

I smile. On the way out, a few students stop by to pat my back, or say “Good job!” Once the room cleared out, I approached Professor Rowe.

“Ah, Melody. You must be so excited! The whole art department was talking about it this morning! Out of all the colleges and universities, they chose you! That’s a huge honor!” Professor smiles.

“Actually, I wanted to talk to you about that,” I clear my throat. “I’m thinking about turning down my spot.”

She frowns. “Melody. You realize this is a huge deal.”

“I know! I was just crunching some numbers, and I just can’t afford this,” I admit. “I know it’s a once in a lifetime opportunity, but there’s nothing I can do.”

“Don’t give up your spot just yet. Maybe you can figure something out.” Professor Howe encourages. “And if not, there’s always next year.”

“Yeah,” I nod. “But it’s okay. Who wants to go to Italy in January? It’s going to be just as cold here, right? So all I have to do is just curl up at home with a bowl of pasta and take pictures of my apartment. It will be the same, right?”

Professor Howe laughs. “I suppose it would be. Just remember, keep your options open. Don’t quit so easily. Perhaps you can brainstorm with a good friend. Have you told anyone yet?”

“Not yet,” I shake my head. “But I think I know who I can go to….”

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ray opens his apartment door and frowns. “Why are you here?”

“Shut up. I want to talk to you about something.” I cross my arms.

“Ugh. Come in.” Ray steps aside.

“Thanks.” I walk in and Ray closes the door behind me. “So,” I fish my acceptance letter out of my backpack. “Read this.” I hand him the letter.

“Ah, you know I don’t read.” Ray reluctantly takes the letter and his eyes scan the page. “Hey, a nerdy school thing. Congrats.” Ray smiles.

I narrow my eyes at him and snatch the letter out of this hands. “If you’re going to be rude, I can leave. I didn’t have to tell you this.”

“I’m being serious,” Ray says in a sincere voice. “This is great. Only thirty people got this opportunity. I’m assuming this is out of all the school in Texas. And you got this shot. I’m really happy for you, Melody. I’m actually proud of you,” Ray smirks. “Even though you are an annoyance.”

“Thanks, asshole,” I smile. “So, here’s the problem. I can’t afford to go. It’s a cool offer, but how could I possibly get that much money on time? I barely make enough to get me through community college. There’s no way I can do this.”

“Hmm…” Ray scratches his chin. “I mean, you don’t know that. You haven’t tried.”

“I need to make $3,000 in a month and a half. You have any ideas?” I cross my arms.

Ray whistles. “That’s a lot…” Ray admits. “Uh… Sexy carwash?” 

“Ray.” I glare. 

“No, obviously I meant that I would be washing the cars. Not you,” Ray grins. “Okay, I’ll be serious. There has to be something…” Ray walks into his living room and plops down on his couch. He pats the spot next to him. “Here, brainstorm with me.”

I sit next to him, thinking. “Hmm… Do you think anyone would just give me money?” I suggest. I’m only kidding, of course.

Ray’s eyes light up. “I mean, you probably could hold a fundraiser or something.”

“But that’s for important stuff. Like raising money for charities and stuff.” I shake my head.

“So, I have a question,” Ray asks, taking the letter from my hands. “This letter doesn’t say anything about paying. Maybe it’s free?”

“When I read about the study abroad trip, it mentions $3,000.”

“So, why doesn’t it say it on the acceptance letter?”

“Christ, I don’t know,” I shake my head. “That’s not the issue. Can we focus on how I’m going to pay for it?”

“I have another question. Who is Samuel Clark? Why is he so important?” Ray studies the letter.

“Who is Samuel Clark?!” I raise an eyebrow. “Are you serious, Ray?”

Ray shrugs. “I didn’t grow up here. How should I know who this guy is?”

“Ugh…” I sigh. “Professor Samuel Clark is a local Austin legend. He’s well known for his paintings. He used to teach at the University of Texas until he moved to Italy.”

“And this guy picked you specifically to be in the art program? Don’t you think that’s a bit odd?” Ray asks.

“Well, I’m sure he picked all the candidates based on skill.” I cross my arms.

“I guess… It’s just weird, that’s all.” Ray shrugs. “Anyway, since this professor dude picked you, why not email him? His information is in the letter. Maybe he can suggest a payment plan or something.”

“Ray, that’s absolutely ridiculous. A payment plan?” I scoff as Ray pulls out his phone. I’m assuming he’s texting Sadie. “Besides, I don’t want to look desperate for money. I either have the money, or I don’t.”

“Emailed him.” Ray interrupts.

My eyes pop open. “Excuse me?!”

“I just sent him an email. I said I was a friend of yours. He might get back to us.”

“You idiot! Do you realize what you just did?! That could cost me my spot!” I shout.

“Well, you said you were considering not going, right? So, it shouldn’t matter.” Ray shrugs.

Does he not care? “Ray, you just emailed one of the most important artists alive, asking for a handout!”

“He’s just a guy, Melody. He’s a human being. You shouldn’t be so shy about emailing him.”

I grit my teeth. “It’s not that I’m shy. It’s just unprofessional!”

“If that’s the case, you can email and apologize. Say you had nothing to do with the email. Which isn’t a lie. I acted on my own,” Ray responds. “Really, it’s not a big deal.”

“Not a big deal?!” I repeat. “That was probably the most irresponsible thing I’ve ever seen you do! And you don’t seem to care! You’re all like “Meh, no big deal”,” I try to mock Ray’s voice. “I can’t believe you right now!” I ramble on. I swear, it pisses me off. Ray nonchalantly looks down at his phone. “Are you even listening to me?!”

Ray smirks. “Uh, Melody? You might want to read this.” He holds out his phone to me.

“I don’t want that.” I turn away, stubbornly.

“Dear Mr. Narvaez,” He reads. “If Melody would just look at her acceptance letter, she will notice that it doesn’t mention a fee. Her acceptance letter is different than the other applicants. Her fee is already taken care of. Let her know that I apologize for any confusion.”

“What?!” I shout. “Gimme that!” I snatch his phone away. I skim the email. He’s not lying. I glance up at Ray, and an annoying little smirk rests on his face. 

“You’re welcome.”

“Ray!” I tackle him to the couch. “Thank you! Thank you!” I thank him in between kisses on his cheek.

“I know,” He chuckles. “I’m kinda awesome.”

I freeze when I realize what I’ve done. I scramble up. My cheeks feel warm.

Ray tilts his head. “Is something wrong?”

“Uh…” I stammer. You know, I’ve been so worried about what Ray thinks of me. Why not just talk to him about it? What’s the worst that could happen? Who knows. Maybe, he’ll like me. Is that something I really want?

“Hey,” He scoots closer. “You can tell me. Really. I’m here to listen. I’m an asshole sometimes, but if something is wrong, I’d like to help.”

“No,” I shake my head. “Nothing is wrong… I… I just…” I gulp. “Ray…”

“Yeah?” 

“I… uh…” God damn it, me! Out of all the times to be nervous, why now?! 

“Suspense is killing, Melody.” Ray lets out a small laugh.

“Sorry,” I clear my throat. There’s no shame in this. I like Ray. Right? Yeah. That sounds about right. I like Ray. There’s no denying that. “Ray, I think I-”

A sharp knock at the door causes us both to jump. “Oh, that must be Sadie.” Ray responds casually.

“S-Sadie?” I feel my heart sink. “Oh, I thought you we’re going to talk to her. Remember? Just friends?”

“Something interesting happened when I walked her home,” Ray says in a quiet voice. “We talked about a lot of things… She’s… not that bad. I think… I’m starting to really like her.”

No. Please, Ray.

“Oh, really?” I force a smile. “That’s great.”

“Yeah,” Ray gets up from the couch. For some reason, we can’t even look at each other. He answers the door. “Hey, Sadie.”

“Hey!” She smiles as she walks in. Her smile fades a bit once she spots me. “Oh. Hey, Melody.”

“Melody was just telling me about the thing she got accepted to.” Ray says, closing the door behind Sadie.

Sadie gasps. “The Italy study abroad thing?! You got it?!”

“And I don’t have to pay a thing.” I grin. Okay, so it might have hurt learning that Ray actually likes Sadie. But how could I not be happy about a free study abroad program? That’s enough to put a smile on anyone’s face.

“That’s fantastic!” Sadie claps. “So, we should celebrate, right? Let’s do something fun! Who should we invite with us? Dustin?”

“Uh, right. Let me call him.” I nod. 

As I’m pulling out my phone, Sadie adds. “You know, you don’t have to. Only if you want to.”

“I want to!” I assure her. If Ray likes Sadie, then I have to be happy for them. Maybe then more time I spend with Dustin, then more I’ll like him.

Sadie studies me. “As long as that’s what you want.”

What I want? I want to spend more time with Ray. But I also want him to be happy. Sadie makes him happy. Not me. 

I text Dustin to meet us at Ray’s apartment. 

“What should we do?” Sadie hums. “Should we go out, or stay here?”

“Why don’t we just stay here?” I suggest. “I just need to be around friends. As long as that’s cool with Ray.

“That’s fine,” Ray nods. “I kinda wanted to stay in, anyway.”

I try to meet Ray’s eyes, but he keeps his gaze away from mine. Perhaps I did something wrong? “Why don’t you guys play a game or something? I’m in the mood to watch something.”

“Great idea!” Sadie sprints to Ray’s game collection. “Hmmm… What do you want to play, Ray?”

“I don’t care.” Ray responds. He sounds like his usual neutral self, but his expression says otherwise. His eyes are doleful and fixed on the ground. What did I do?

“Here,” Sadie pulls out some fighting game. “This game is easy enough. Melody, if you want to play, all you have to do is mash random button. Fighting games are fun and east to play with a group of people.”

“Maybe I’ll play a few rounds later. I just want to watch you guys play until Dustin gets here.”

Sadie pops in the game and she settles on the couch next to me. Ray sits next to her and they start playing.

I keep glancing at Ray. He’s focused on the game. He’s laughing whenever he’s losing a match. So that’s good. Maybe I imagined that sad look on his face. Why would he have any reason to be upset?

I push all thoughts out and try to focus on the fighting game.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Melody,” Dustin shakes my shoulder. I sit up. I fell asleep? Oops. “Hey, Congrats on the program! That’s super great!” Dustin pulls me in for a hug.

“Thanks,” I smile. “I’m really excited.”

“I bet! You’re going to Italy for a month? Man, that would be cool if I could come with. Italy must be beautiful”

“Even in the winter time, it’s supposed to be pretty,” Sadie adds. “You better take lots of pictures for me!”

“Uh, of course? What else will I be doing there? Photography major. Remember?” I tease.

I notice Ray is sitting in silence, still playing the game against Sadie. 

Dustin picks up a controller. “Okay, next round, I want it.” Dustin declares.

“You got it, buddy.” Ray answers.

“Ray,” I say, hoping to get his attention. “What should we do for dinner? Should we order in, or should I cook something?”

“Heh, you can cook?” Ray giggles. Well, at least he’s talking to me… “Nah, it’s your day. I can’t allow you to do that. We’ll just order something.”

“Nope,” I stand up. “You all keep playing games. I’ll cook us dinner.” I insist as I walk past the couch and into the kitchen. I start looking into the refrigerator.

I feel a presence behind me. I turn my head. Ray is standing directly behind me. “See anything good?”

“I got this. Go play games.” I try to shoo him away.

“It’s my apartment. It would be rude to let the guest of honor cook by herself. Let me help.”

“Okay,” I give in. “Do you have anything good?”

“I have potato chips.” Ray offers. 

I let out a deep sigh. “No, stupid. I meant something good to cook.”

“Oh. Then no.” Ray shakes his head.

“I’ll run to the store,” I dig through my wallet. “I have a few extra bucks this month.”

“Need Dustin to drive? I can tear him away from the game, if you’d like.”

“Nah,” I start putting on my coat. “There’s a grocery store just down the street. No sense in wasting gas,” I start heading out the door. “Once they notice I’m gone, let them know that I ran to the store.”

Ray is about to protest but I close the door. I could use a moment to myself. I need to sort things out. This seems like a typical “Screw you, Melody” moment. As soon as I’m willing to admit liking Ray just a little bit, he starts liking my best friend. I should probably just tell him anyway. I mean, I like him, too. So, I have just as much of a right to express my feelings for him. But of course, I would never do that to Sadie. I suppose I have myself to blame. If only I could have realized it sooner.

I hear footsteps patter down the hall, catching up to me. I turn around to find Ray following after me, zipping up his fall jacket. “Ray?”

“I figured you could use some manly muscle to help you carry our dinner.” Ray smiles.

“Why not send a real man, then?” I smirk.

“That hurts,” Ray clutches his chest. “But because you’re my friend, I’ll let it slide.”

We continue to walk out of the apartment complex. “Wait, what about Dustin and Sadie? What did they say?”

“Nothing,” Ray shrugs. “I just walked out the door. They didn’t even notice.”

“You’re such an ass…” I shake my head.

Ray and I arrive at the store. Ray grabs a shopping cart before I can. “I got it. Don’t worry.” He says.

“Oh, how nice,” I hum. “That’s really mature of you, Ray.”

I might as well start eating my words. That “mature Ray” I just mentioned in now riding the shopping cart into the store. “Ray! Get down!” I scold, chasing after him. Once I catch up, I grab the cart, yanking it to a halt. 

“Aww. What’d you do that for?” Ray frowns.

“Get your ass down,” I growl. “You clearly can’t be trusted with anything with wheels.”

“So mean,” Ray chuckles. “What are you planning to make, anyway?”

“I’m thinking stuffed peppers,” I state. “Or maybe taco boats.”

“What the fuck is a taco boat?” Ray snickers.

“It’s like a taco only the shell is like a boat. It’s exactly as it sounds.”

“That’s sounds stupid.” Ray comments.

“Fine. Let’s stick with stuffed peppers. I just want meat.” I roll my eyes.

“Heh heh… I can give-”

“Don’t finish that sentence if you want to live.” I warn. I walk into the produce section. “All we need is ground beef, cheese, lettuce, bell peppers, and some sour cream would be nice, too.”

Ray picks up the first batch of bell peppers he can find. “Bell peppers, check.” He smiles with pride.

“You didn’t even check them,” I start inspecting them. “Look, this one’s all gross. Let’s get a different pack.”

“Fine…” Ray grumbles.

We wander around the store, getting everything that we need. “Okay, Ray. I think we got everything.” I announce, turning to place the ground beef into the basket. I turn around and the basket, along with Ray, is gone. “Ray?” 

“Melody!” I hear Ray shout. I scan the store. I spot Ray, riding on the shopping cart, charging towards me. 

“What the hell are you doing?!” I panic, throwing my arms in front of me to brace myself.

Right before the cart slams into me, Ray hops down, bringing the cart to a stop. “Hi.” He grins.

“I fucking hate you.” I growl.

“Aww, come on. I would never run you over.” Ray chuckles.

“Oh, I feel safe now.” I grumble as I throw the meat into the basket.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Are you still mad at me?” Ray asks, unlocking his door.

“No.” I grumble. Once we step through the door, Sadie and Dustin turn to face us.

“Oh, you guys left?” Dustin frowns.

“We just ran to the store to get food,” I inform them. “You guys keep playing. I’ll work on dinner.”

They continue their attention to the game.

“You know what? I’ve always wanted a reason to use this,” Ray says, rushing into his room. He comes back out with two aprons. “You should wear one, too!” Ray hands it to me. “My mom bought me these aprons as a joke, but now I have a reason to wear them.”

Just to humor him, I put on the purple apron. I notice that we’re matching. I blush, trying to push the thought out of my head.

“So, what shall we do first, chef?” Ray asks.

“I’ll cook the meat. You can hollow out the peppers.” I instruct.

“Yes, chef.” Ray salutes me and starts washing the peppers.

 I can’t help but smile. He’s so cute. I wonder if this is what it would be like if we lived together.

I turn away, facing the stove to start preparing the meat. I hear something drop on the counter, followed by a hiss of pain.

“Ray?” I spin around.

Ray is facing the counter, hunched over. “I’m fine.” He says through grit teeth.

“What did you do?” I walk over trying to peek over his shoulder. Ray jerks away. 

“Nothing!” Ray squeaks.

“What are you hiding?” I force him to spin around. Ray is holding onto his hand, a small trickle of blood dripping from his hand. “Ray! What happened?!” 

“I kinda sliced my finger…” Ray winces. “It’s not deep, but it hurts. Just a bit.”

“Here,” I sigh, pulling him to his bathroom. “Band aids are in the cabinet, right?” I start searching through his cabinets. I find band aids and rubbing alcohol. 

“I can take care of it myself. Put the alcohol away.” Ray frowns.

“No. It could get infected,” I take a rag and dab the rubbing alcohol on it. “Now, this won’t hurt a bit.”

“It’s going to hurt.” He grumbles.

“Don’t be a baby.” I scold. I press the rag to the cut.

“Fuuuuuck! Stop it.” He tries to pull his hand away. 

“Stop it,” I warn. “All I have to do is wrap it up.” 

Ray is quiet for a moment as I tend to his wound. “How are you so good at this?”

“I used to have to take care of myself,” I explain. “Let’s just say I was a curious kid that used to get hurt a lot.”

“You were a little trouble maker, weren’t you?” He smiles.

“I wasn’t a trouble maker,” I insist. “I just didn’t care for dolls or toys or anything. All I wanted to do was explore outside.”

“That’s kinda cute…” Ray mumbles under his breath.

I tilt my head. “Really?”

Sadie rushes into the bathroom. “What the heck happened?” She says, Ray’s injury. 

Damn it, Sadie. Why now? You were so busy playing with Dustin, you didn’t notice he got hurt.

“I sliced my hand while trying to cook.” Ray explains, sheepishly.

“Aww, my klutzy boy.” Sadie shakes her head. “Why don’t you go rest and I’ll take your place?”

“No,” I shake my head. “I got it. All of you go play the fighting game.” I push them out of the bathroom and I continue with dinner.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After eating, Dustin drops me off at my apartment. I quickly shoot Professor Clark an email, thanking him for the opportunity to go to Italy. I was so busy with Ray, I completely forgot to thank him. 

Now, I’m lying in bed. It’s been an interesting day and I really just want to sleep. But I can’t. This whole situation with Ray is confusing me. Is it worth breaking my best friend’s heart just for me to be happy?

But on the other hand, she’s not really taking the time to notice how I feel about Ray. I mean, I’d like to think it’s pretty obvious. The chemistry is there. But, of course, I can’t say that. Maybe it’s not obvious. 

I only wish I could tell Ray. What would his reaction be? Would he turn me away? 

 


	6. Locked Away

It’s been a month since Ray and Sadie became official. How do I know? Because Sadie hasn’t shut up about it.

“I wonder if he’s going to get me something,” Sadie wonders aloud as we clock out of work. “I mean, it is our one month anniversary. And not to mention that Christmas is next week. Maybe I’ll get two gifts! Hmm… I wonder what I should get him.”

“Sadie,” I huff, trying not to sound annoyed. “A month anniversary doesn’t exist. Anniversary means yearly.”

“A month-iversary does exist!” She places her hands on her hips. “Now, come on. Help me think. What should I get him?”

“A present should be personal, Sadie. It’s up to you what you think he would like.” I shrug. Besides, she should know him better than me by now.

“I guess you’re right,” She pouts. “But can you do me a favor? You don’t have to, but if you see something you think he would like, just shoot me a text and let me know? I would really appreciate it.”

“I can do that.” I nod. Damn, I give in so easily.

“Speaking of month-iversaries,” Sadie continues. “How are things going with you and Dustin?”

“We’re doing really well.” I lie. Actually, it’s not much of a lie. As far as Dustin knows, we really are good. We have been on a few dates here and there. I honestly thought he would be bored of me by now. He’s not a bad guy. He’s fun to be around, but I just can’t picture myself with him. Perhaps it’s because my attention is somewhere it shouldn’t be.

“Need a ride home?” Sadie offers.

“Nah, I’ll take the bus. You should probably browse the mall for some ideas for Ray.”

“Nah. I’m going straight home. It’s supposed to snow and I want to get home before that happens!” Sadie shuffles off. “Bye, Melody! Don’t forget about my party tomorrow!”

Right. Her Christmas party. I’m really not looking forward to watching her snuggle with Ray all night… I wave goodbye and exit the mall. The blistering wind whips around. It rarely snows in Austin, but according to the news, it was supposed to do so. I doubt it will. I’m more concerned about the ice. It rained yesterday and I can already feel the ground becoming slick.

I head for the bus stop. You know, I really should see what Ray is up to. Ray’s apartment is on the same bus route as mine. So, I might as well drop by.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ray opens his door and frowns. “Eww.”

“Shut your face,” I push past him. “What the hell are you doing now?” I motion to his clothing. He’s wearing gray basketball shorts with a black tee. “I hope you didn’t go outside like that.”

“Nope,” Ray stretches. “Just got home from work. I just changed into something comfy and I was about to watch T.V. I haven’t done that in a while. Want to watch with me?”

“Sure, but that’s not why I’m here,” I remove my coat and we sit on the couch. “I was wondering what you got Sadie for Christmas or your month-iversary.”

“Our what?” Ray laughs as he turns on the T.V and starts flipping through channels.

“Ray! I’m serious!” I scold. “What did you get her?”

Ray’s laughter begins to fade. “Oh, uh, I didn’t get anything.”

“Nothing?!”

“Was I supposed to?”

“Ray!” I grumble. I snatch the remote out of his hands. “Get up and put some clothes on. We’re catching a bus to the mall.”

“Aww, come on!” Ray whines.

“Don’t get sassy. Go get some pants on! You’ll freeze out there.”

Ray mumbles as he sulks to his room. “I’m not getting sassy. _You’re_ getting sassy.” 

Is this wrong? I’m finally admitting that I have feelings for Ray, and now I’m about to help him pick out a present for his girlfriend. I just want to spend more time with him. That’s messed up. I’m not a real friend. If only I had the balls to just come out and say how I felt, maybe I wouldn’t feel so shitty right now…

To distract myself, I scroll through my emails while I wait for Ray to get ready. I was so busy with work and finals, I didn’t get to check this week. I sent Professor Clark an email about a month ago. I’ve been looking for some kind of reply. So far, I haven’t gotten anything back.

Until today.

I grin as I find one unread email from Professor Clark.

“ _Dear Melody,_ ” It reads. “ _There is no need to thank me for your tuition free trip. It’s an honor. I’ve looked over your portfolio and it’s apparent that you have an immense amount of talent. You earned this. Also, I’d like to apologize for taking so long to reply. You see, it’s taken me some time to decide a proper way to respond._ ” Hmm, why? What does that mean? “ _I’ll be in town next week for the introduction meeting for the trip. I look forward to meeting you, Melody. Perhaps, we can have a discussion about something rather important._ ”

“Okay, I’m ready to go.” Ray rolls his eyes.

“Ray,” I stand, holding out my phone. “Professor Clark wants to meet with me.”

“Huh?” Ray takes my phone and skims the email. “That sounds shady as fuck.” Ray hands it back. “What are you going to do?”

“He’s my idol,” I explain as I slip on my coat. “I have to go.”

“No, you don’t,” Ray scoffs. “You don’t “have” to do anything.”

“Okay, I want to go,” I correct myself. “He said he had something important to talk about. What do you think it is?” I ask as Ray locks up his apartment.

“I don’t know. But just be careful, okay? I don’t like this.”

“Awww! Are you worried about me?!” I tease.

“I don’t give a shit about you,” He shrugs. “I just don’t want anything bad to happen to you.”

“Then, you do care.” I insist. I shiver once we start walking outside.

“I do not,” Ray shakes his head. “You have no proof.” He smiles. “Now, what the hell am I supposed to be getting her?”

“Sadie likes video games and music. Really, she likes a lot of the same things that you like. That should help you.” I say once we reach the bus stop. A bus pulls up and we hurry inside.

“Okay,” Ray wraps his arms around himself. “Damn, it’s fucking cold! Why did I let you drag me out here?”

“Because you want to keep your girlfriend happy and get her a gift, don’t you? Now, don’t whine.”

“I’ll whine if I want to,” Ray grumbles, looking out the window. “Hey, look at those clouds.”

“The news said it was supposed to snow.” I say.

“In Texas? Nah. That won’t happen. I’m more concerned about the roads freezing up.”

“My thoughts exactly. Luckily, the roads seem manageable.” I nod.

We ride in silence as we look out the window. Once we arrive to our destination, we get off the bus.

“You know what I don’t understand,” Ray asks as we step through the automatic doors of the mall. Ugh… I was just here less than an hour ago for work. And now I’m back, trying to help Ray. I swear, the things I do for him… “Why do you girls believe in silly things like month-iversaries?”

“Excuse me, it’s not all girls,” I remind him. “Some girls just like to feel appreciated and remembered. I can’t say that I agree with celebrating month-iversaries, but I see why people do it. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to feel special.”

“And she can’t feel that way by the fact that I’m with her?” Ray counters.

“Hey, you’re the one dating her. Don’t turn on me.” I warn.

“I’m not!” Ray defends. “Just help me. Where am I supposed to start?”

“People like it when you put a lot of thought into a gift,” I think as I peek into shop windows as we pass. “All you have to do is think about what Sadie likes.” I turn to look at Ray, but he is no longer by my side. “Ray?” I look around, trying to find him. All I see is his backside rushing into the nearby game shop. “Unbelievable…” I shake my head and follow after him.

Ray is humming to himself as he browses through the games. 

“Ray!” I call, getting his attention. I walk up to him. “We’re here for Sadie, not you.” I remind him.

“Can’t it be both?” Ray chuckles. “I like games and so does she. Look! All games on this wall are half off.”

“But she can buy a game herself! Why don’t you get her something sweet?”

“But if I buy a game for her, it will save her money. Best gift ever!” Ray throws his hands in the air.

“Ugh… this is useless,” I slap my forehead. “Fine, you win. Pick a game, and let’s go.”

Ray’s attention is drawn to some kind of game controllers. “Oh, I’ve always wanted one of those,” Ray nods in the direction of the controllers. “They’re custom made. You can add whatever you want.”

“Oh, really?” I respond as I text Sadie what to get him. There. Now, she knows what he wants.

As Ray’s filing through the games, everything goes dark.

“Ray?” I grab his arm. “Is this you?”

“It’s me,” I feel his hand over mine. “What the fuck just happened?”

Emergency lights flip on, providing a very small amount of light.

“Here,” Ray takes my hand and intertwines his fingers in mine. “Follow me.” I blush as he starts leading me out of the store. Outside in the mall, there’s loud murmur. Everyone is wandering out to the main area of the mall, looking for some kind of an answer.

A man stands on the second level of the mall with a bullhorn. “Attention shoppers!” He announces. “We apologize for the incontinence. Since the doors are automatic, we are currently working to get the problem fixed.”

“How reassuring.” I mumble under my breath. “I’m sorry, Ray. I didn’t mean to get us trapped here.”

“You didn’t cause the power outage. Don’t worry about it,” Ray rubs his thumb across my hand. He sits by the wall. I slide down next to him, not letting go. “So, Italy in two weeks. Are you excited?”

“Of course! I have everything packed and I’m ready to go now!” I clap. 

“You’re going to be gone an entire semester, right?” Ray thinks. “We’re hanging out before you leave.”

“That goes without saying,” I nod. “I wouldn’t leave without saying bye.”

“You make it sound so final,” Ray clutches his chest. “That hurts. I don’t want to think of you leaving me. It hurts too much.” He teases.

“Shush,” I giggle as I lean on his shoulder. “It’s only about five months. I’ll be back by the summer. Besides, you act like I can’t text.”

“My little Melody’s all grown up,” I expected Ray to pull away. He doesn’t. He rests his head on mine. “You better text me. Don’t make me walk to Italy. I won’t like it, but I’ll do it so I can kick your butt.”

“Don’t be mean!” I roll my eyes. I shouldn’t be this happy to be around him. I don’t care why the power is out. I’m just happy I can be stuck here with him.

I hear nearby voices begin to speak. “Did you hear what happened?” A woman asks.

“No,” the other woman answers. “What?”

“Apparently, there was a huge accident near the mall. It’s like a ten car pileup. There was a semi- truck the slid and it hit a nearby power line.”

I sit up, paying closer attention. I start to shake a little. An accident?

“Really? That’s awful!”

“I just checked the news on my phone. I hope no one was hurt. Looks like it could take hours to fix everything.”

The calm I was feeling before is now gone. My heart is racing and all I want to do is cry. I hate accidents. I hate people getting hurt. No one else needs to die. I can’t handle that. It’s just a reminder that no one is safe. I’m not safe. But more importantly, my friends aren’t safe. I don’t want any more people to die

Ray tilts his head. “Melody, are you okay?”

“You didn’t hear that?” I gulp. “There was an accident that caused the power to go out.”

“Oh, that’s not good…. Hey, what’s wrong?” Ray leans in closer, noticing my shallow breathing.

“I wonder how many people died.” I mumble. “Do you think they’re okay?”

Ray gets a confused look. “That’s a bit dark to think about. Maybe everyone is okay. Let’s not think about it, okay?”

I don’t answer. 

Ray thinks for a moment. “You’re adopted parents died in an accident. I remember you mentioned that.” Ray realizes. 

“My parents. Just because they weren’t my biological parents, doesn’t mean that they weren’t my real family.” I snap.

“You’re right. I’m sorry,” He says, cautiously. “Hey,” He pats my back. “I’m sure everyone is okay. And we’re okay. That’s a good thing. So, let’s try to stay calm. I won’t know what to do if you start having a panic attack.” Ray teases.

Something about his insensitive comment causes me to let out a laugh.

“That’s better,” He rubs my back. “Is there something I can do to help more? I’m really bad at this shit.”

“Just… just give me a minute…” I tuck my head between my knees to control my breathing. “Everything is fine,” I mumble to myself. “Everything is okay.”

I feel an arm slip around my shoulders. “I’m here if you need me. Do what you have to do to feel better.” Ray says in a soft voice.

I take a few deep breaths before finally calming down. I sit back up. “Blah,” I smile like nothing happened. “I haven’t had one that bad in years.”

“So, you get panic attacks?”

“Well, I used to,” I shrug. “I used to have really bad anxiety. I guess it just kinda got triggered for a silly reason. It’s not a big deal. Don’t worry.” Anxiety isn't something that just goes away. I know this. But I don't want to worry Ray. I know many people have it worse than I do... So, I'd rather not complain. Why worry everyone if I can deal with it myself?

“Okay,” Ray hesitates. “If you say so. Try not to worry me again.” Ray jokes. “We’re already trapped in a mall. I don’t need you go crazy, too.”

“Having anxiety doesn’t make a person crazy. Don’t make me slap you.” I warn. 

“I’m sorry!” Ray laughs. “You know, I like being trapped in the mall with you. It’s kinda cool. Not only do I get to hang out with my friend, we get to experience something totally bizarre.” 

I swear, why do I like him so much…?

“Anyway, you think they’ll still sell me a game? I mean, the mall is still technically open.” Ray wonders.

“Ray…” I shake my head. No, seriously. Why do I like him?

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“It’s been two hours…” I grumble. “I want dinner.”

“Want to go to the food court?” Ray offers.

“No,” I poke out my lip. “I want real food.”

“Well, we don’t have that option right now.” Ray says. On cue, the lights flip on. I turn and smirk. Before I can say anything, Ray interrupts. “Yeah, I know. Let’s go.” He stands and helps me stand. “Since you want real food, you’re cooking.”

“Really? You want me to come over? How will I get home? I’m pretty sure we’re about to catch the last bus.”

Ray shrugs. “Just stay over. I like spending time with you. Besides, you’re my ticket to a real home cooked meal.”

I shake my head. “So, you’re just using me, eh?”

“Pretty much.” Ray grins as we make our way out of the mall. 

We made it just in time to catch the last bus. Once we get back to Ray’s apartment, I start making dinner. Burgers are simple enough.

“What did you get Sadie?” I ask.

“I got that new fighting game. Sadie seems to really enjoy these.” Ray comments.

“Typical,” I sigh. “You nerdy gamers…”

“Hey, I don’t make fun of you for your hobby. Don’t make fun of me for mine.” Ray sticks out his tongue.

“Photography is not just a hobby,” I respond. “It’s a way of life.”

“So is gaming.” Ray continues.

“Fine. Let’s just leave it at that.” I say as I start flipping the burgers.

“Yeah. Focus on the food. I don’t want to eat raw meat.” Ray teases.

“Are you the one cooking? I don’t think so.” I snap. He’s such a pain in the ass. But, I still enjoy this banter with him. 

I really could see myself getting used to this. Maybe, just maybe, it can happen one day.

 


	7. A Not-So-Merry Party

I hear faint voices in the room. I force open my eyes. I allow my eyes to adjust to the bright sun peeking in through the shades. I look around. I’m still at Ray’s apartment. The TV is still on. We must have fallen asleep. I look at the opposite end of the couch from me. Ray curled up, asleep. He has a peaceful look on his face as his rhythmic breathing breaks out in a soft snore. I admire how comfortable he looks. It would be a shame if someone woke him up.

“Hey,” I nudge his butt with my foot. “Wake up.”

“Mmmmm…” Ray scrunches his eyebrows, curling up into a tighter ball.

“Hey,” I nudge him again. “Make me food.”

“You know where the kitchen is, woman.” Ray replies, his voice thick with sleep.

“I made dinner.” I remind him.

“Yeah. And it was great. Go make more food and stop bugging me. I can’t cook.” Ray snaps as he tries to go back to sleep.

I roll my eyes and slide off the couch. I glance at the clock. 11 AM. We still have plenty of time before heading to Sadie’s apartment. I walk to the kitchen and raid his cabinets. A bowl of cereal will do. I don’t need much in the morning… Or rather, afternoon.

A light snore can be heard from the couch. I giggle to myself. He fell back asleep so quickly.

I wonder how often Sadie comes over and stays the night with him. How often do they interact? They’re dating, so one would assume that they talk a lot. It seems like I’m the only one he likes to put up with. But that’s wishful thinking.

“I really like you, Ray,” I admit out loud. “Can’t you see that? I’m comfortable around you and I don’t know what to do about that,” The only response I get from him is a soft snore. I let out a sigh. “Why can’t it be that easy when you’re awake?”

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

We step off the bus. Sadie’s apartment is not far from the bus stop. As we walk, I tug at the shirt Ray let me borrow. I’m starting to realize that I wear Ray’s clothing more than my own… Okay, that’s a bit of an exaggeration. But, his clothes are so comforting. I’m sure anyone seeing us now think that we’re dating.

I should be the one with Ray. Not Sadie.

“Thanks for coming early with me,” Ray says. “I don’t know what she expects me to do.”

“She just wants some help setting up for the party. I was coming over, anyway.” I shrug.

“You know I’m not good at stuff like that,” Ray insists. “I don’t think I’ll be much help.”

“Sadie will tell you. Trust me. When she throws a party, everything has to be perfect,” I assure him. “She does this every year.” And every year, she has a new boyfriend to show off. I’ll keep that to myself, though.

We walk up to her apartment. Ray starts to knock on the door. I stop him.

“She’s expecting us, so the door’s open.” I explain as I walk in. Ray follows behind me. “Sadie!” I call throughout the apartment. “Ray and I are here.”

Sadie pokes her head out from the upstairs balcony. “Great!” She jogs down the steps. I have almost everything set up. I just need to pick up the food, and set up the beer pong table.”

“Beer pong at a Christmas party, huh? Well, I suppose I’ve heard stranger things,” Ray chuckles as Sadie jumps in his arms. “Hey, babe.” He kisses her cheek. I flinch. I really don’t want to be alone with them.

“I’ll let you and Melody finish decorating, and I’ll get the food. It won’t take long.” Sadie promises. She slides on her coat and grabs her keys. 

“Aww, leaving already? We just got here.” I frown. I can’t help but feel a bit relieved. I get more time with Ray.

“I know! I suck. But I promise, I’ll make it up to you. Bye!” Sadie rushes out the apartment.

I’m almost glad she doesn’t know that I like Ray. That would be a set of problems I don’t need.

“So, what now?” Ray shrugs.

“Sadie has a box of decorations in the closet. Let’s just make the place look good.” I say. Ray follows me as I retrieve the decorations.

“So, why is the party so early? Christmas isn’t for another two weeks. Does she do this every year?” Ray asks.

“She knows people will be busy around that time, so she has the party early so everyone can spend some time together,” I answer. I hand Ray the box. “Let’s wrap this reef around the railing. I think that would look cool.”

“Sure,” Ray holds out his hand. “You tell me what to do, and I’ll do it. I really don’t have an eye for this kind of thing,” We start decorating the railing. “So, excited about Italy?”

“Yeah! I still have to meet with Professor Clarke. He’ll be in town for the orientation.”

“I remember you mentioned that,” Ray nods, wrapping the reef. “I still don’t trust this guy. A free ride and wants to talk to you? Sounds weird to me.”

“I’m grateful,” I argue. “I should show my appreciation somehow.”

“Oh, don’t worry. He’ll have you doing some weird shit to show how appreciated you are.” Ray smirks.

“That’s gross,” I cringe. “It’s nothing like that.”

“I’m looking this dude up.” Ray says, taking his phone out of his pocket.

“You do that. You will find that he is a very nice guy.” I pout. Why does it matter to him, anyway? What does he care?

“Samuel Clarke,” Ray reads. “This him?” He points his phone in my direction.

I study the picture. Tan skin, black hair, brown eyes, scruffy beard. “Yep. That’s him.” I nod.

Ray’s eyes dart from the phone to me. “Huh. You know, if you shave your head, you’d look just like him.” He teases.

“You asshole. Not all people with tan skin and dark hair look alike,” I cross my arms. “If they did, then we would look alike.”

“You wish you looked like this,” Ray gestures to himself. “Don’t hate.”

“Ugh. Why do I put up with you again?” I shake my head. “Let’s just finish these decorations.” I dig through the box. Something catches my eye. A mistletoe. It wouldn’t be a Christmas party without at least one in the house. I fish it out and walk to the lower area of the apartment. I stand on the tips of my toes to hang it in the hallway. Perfect.

“Melody,” Ray bounces down the steps. “Where did you disappear to? We still need to set up that damn table upstairs.” Ray stands next to me.

“I was just setting up the… Oops…” I look up. We’re both standing under the mistletoe. 

Ray glances up. “Oh, look at that. That’s probably not the best place for it. Unless you want people to make out every time they try to get to the bathroom.”

“You’re right,” I feel my cheeks grow warm. “I should move that.” I reach up to take it down.

“Hold on,” Ray places his hands on my shoulders. Before I can ask what he wants, he presses his lips to my forehead. “There. Now, Santa won’t hate me for breaking the rules.”

“What are you talking about?!” I snap, my heart beating in my chest.

“When two people stand under the mistletoe, they have to kiss. If they don’t, Santa is going to get on his sleigh and hunt them down.” Ray chuckles.

“Okaaaay, I never heard that last part.” I raise an eyebrow.

“That’s because I made it up,” Ray grins. “Now, move that mistletoe, then see if you can find some red fabric. I think it would look nice hanging on the table.”

I giggle to myself as Ray rambles on about decorations. He claims that he’s not good at it, but here he is, telling me what to look for.

Ray retreats back upstairs. I touch my forehead. Ray kissed me. That means something, right? Maybe he does have some kind of feelings for me. I’m sure Ray isn’t really concerned about Santa.

One day, I want to tell Ray about how much I care about him. Maybe this could go somewhere. The more time I spend with him, the more courage I get.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Once the party gets going, I do what I usually do; drink and socialize. I’m not a particularly religious person. I don’t care for holidays. But I’m here for the party. I almost forgot that Ray is here. I search the crowd for Ray. Just three drinks in. I’m feeling pretty good.

There’s a respectable crowd here tonight. I know almost everyone here. There’s a low hum over the music, due to all the conversations happening at once.

I spot Ray in a center of a crowd. Huh. Ray is certainly getting popular here. Although, he doesn’t seem to be paying attention. He looks bored. I make my way in the crowd, working to get to Ray.

“Isn’t he a sweetheart?” I hear Sadie say. Oh, right… Sadie has her arm looped around Ray’s. She’s showing off another catch. And I don’t blame her. If Ray was mine, I would do the same. Ray is someone to be proud of. “Melody and Ray helped set everything up. I’d be so lost without them.”

“Where did you guys meet? You’re so cute!” A girl in the front asks.

“Melody introduced us! Isn’t that nice?” Sadie gives a warm smile. “Melody is too good to me. I wonder why Dustin isn’t around more often. She’s too awesome to pass up.”

I stay hidden in the crowd, frozen. I never even stopped to think about Sadie. Look how happy she is.

“Melody doesn’t need anyone, anyway,” A man says. “She’s so independent. I can’t see her being with a guy for more than a few months.”

I take a large gulp from my cup. Just because I don’t stay in a relationship long, doesn’t mean I don’t get lonely. I’m tired of it. I just want to find someone I can settle with. Is that so wrong?

“Actually, any guy would be lucky to have her. She just haven’t met anyone worthy.” Ray speaks up.

Ray…

“Oh, he speaks.” a voice in the crowd taunts. 

“Yeah, I have something to say when someone is talking bad about her.” Ray responds in a calm manner. I can hear the spite in his voice, but he’s playing it off.

“Baby, it’s okay,” Sadie places her hand on his chest. “No one is saying anything bad about Melody.”

“I’m going to get some air,” Ray excuses himself. “I’ll be back.”

“Okay. We’ll exchange gifts when you get back?” Sadie asks.

Ray simply nods as he pushes his way out of the crowd. I down the rest of my drink. I’m starting to get the buzz I need. I grab a new cup before following him.

Ray walks out to the balcony, closing the door behind him. I exit to the balcony. There is another couple out here. They’re so wrapped up in each other, they don’t even notice us. “Hey.”

Ray turns his head. “Hey,” He waves. “I was wondering where you were.”

Oh, were you? Why is that? “I’m here.” I giggle.

“Thanks. I see that.” Ray rolls his eyes.

“Why didn’t you just come find me?” I pout. 

“I know you love parties. I didn’t want to be a bother.” Ray shrugs.

“You, sir, are not a bother.” I place my hand on his shoulder.

Ray raises an eyebrow. “Wow, getting drunk already?”

“Me? Drunk? Noooooo.” I shake my head. Tipsy? Sure. Drunk? Not possible. Strangely enough, I feel like being completely honest with him right now.

“Okay, if you say so. Just try not to fall off the balcony.” He smirks.

“You would save me.” I lean on the railing.

“And what makes you think that?” Ray teases. 

“Because your life would be boring without me!” I stick my tongue out at him. He has to like me. At least a little bit.

“I’ll admit, there’s never a dull moment with you around. You’re either throwing a fit, freaking out, or making me laugh.” Ray says in a quiet voice. I almost didn’t catch it.

“I’ll take that as a compliment.” I smile triumphantly.

“Wasn’t much of a compliment, but whatever makes you feel better.” Ray nudges with his arm.

I take a sip of whatever drink is in my cup. I can barely taste anything before it’s down my throat.

“Where the hell is your coat?” Ray scolds. “Do you realize how cold it is out here?”

“I don’t need it,” I hold up my cup. “This is keeping me warm.”

“Aw, shit. You are drunk,” Ray shakes his head. “I really hate being around people that drink. Did you know that?”

“I didn’t. So then why do you hang around me?” I can’t help but ask.

“I don’t even know” Ray sighs.

I don’t why I want to do this… I reach up and pull his beanie off his head. 

“Um?” Ray frowns.

I shove the beanie over my head. “I’m Ray,” I try to imitate his voice. “I’m a big jerk. And Melody is my best friend. And I love her to death.”

“Give me my hat back.” Ray holds out his hand.

“No. It’s mine. I’m Ray.” I smirk. 

“What the hell are you talking about?” Ray laughs.

“I’m going to play videogames all day and be antisocial.” I continue.

“Well, then I’m Melody,” Ray says in a blank tone. “I like to annoy the hell out of my friend Ray, because I have nothing better to do.”

“Okay, I’ll stop. I just ran out of things to talk about.”

“So, you pretend to be me? That’s sad.” Ray smiles. “Okay, that’s enough air for me. Let’s head back in. Maybe Dustin is here.”

Great. I didn’t realize he was coming. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a cool dude. I just don’t have to energy to try and talk to him today. I just want to talk to Ray…

“Here’s your hat thingy.” I take off the beanie to return it.

Ray takes the beanie out of my hands and places it back on my head. “You’re Ray, remember?” He says. “Besides, it’s kinda cute on you. You look more approachable and less like a bitch.”

“That’s not how you’re supposed to compliment someone!” I whine as we make our way back to the party.

Ray smiles as a reply. He has to like me. He smiles more around me. When he was with Sadie a few moments ago, he seemed distant. Maybe it’s all in my head. But what if it’s not? What would I say to him? Better question, would I really do this to Sadie?

“Oh! Ray! Present time!” Sadie calls over to him.

Ray lets out a small groan. “I like her and all, but can I get a few moments without her? She wants to be around all the time…” He grumbles.

I tilt my head. But I’m around all the time. He doesn’t complain about me. At least, not that I know about.

“It won’t be so bad. After this, I’ll lead you to Sadie’s game room.” I promise.

Ray seems to light up at the mention of games. “I’m in.” Ray retrieves his gift for Sadie. He hands it to her as we approach. Ray steps closer to Sadie, completely leaving my side. I can’t help but frown. This is reality. It would be silly to think Ray would want me. He has a girlfriend. What the hell would he want with me?

“Wait! Before we open anything, look up!” Sadie giggles. 

Ray and I look up at the same time. Oh, that damn mistletoe. Why did I have to put it there?

Ray rests his hand on her cheek as he leans in for a kiss. I force myself to look away. I’ve seen them kiss before. It’s nothing new. It just bothers me more than ever right now.

“Here’s your gift!” Sadie hands him a box. She looks my way and winks. I guess she went with the customizable controller. “I wonder what you got me.” She wonders as she removes the wrapping paper. 

I can’t help but feel a bit jealous. Even though I think the holidays are complete garbage, it still would be nice to get something. I want to exchange gifts with someone. I’ve never been in a relationship long enough to be able to do so. I could just picture me and Ray exchanging gifts. Of course, it would end in a silly, pointless fight, but at the end of the day, at least we would have each other. But it’s not the truth.

I take a final sip of my drink. Drinking is supposed to help you feel good. The second you start getting bitter, you should stop drinking. That’s enough for me tonight.

I study the look on Sadie’s face while she’s around Ray. She’s smiling, laughing. Ray makes her happy. I secretly want Ray. What kind of friend am I?

I step back to let them open their gifts. There’s already a crowd watching them. I didn’t want to make it any worse. For Ray and myself.

I walk upstairs. I pass a group of people playing beer pong. I notice Dustin is one of those people. He glances up at me. “Melody!” He waves. I can barely hear him over the crowd.

I offer a weak wave and keep walking. I’m sure he wants to talk. I’ll make it up to him later. I just want to be alone right now.

I don’t know why I’m letting this bother me right now. I should be used to this. Ray is with Sadie. Not me. It’s not like I lost him to her. But… I never got the chance, either. 

I’m beyond denying that I like Ray. However, I’m still confused as to why I like him so much. We are almost polar opposites. Lately, we’ve been getting along more, but that doesn’t change the fact that we have nothing in common. I wonder if I was a little more like Sadie, maybe Ray would have picked me. If I had only realized my feelings sooner, maybe I would have had a fighting chance. But it’s too late, isn’t it? To confess to him now would be completely unfair.

I duck into a random room. It takes me a moment to recognize that I’m in her game room. There’s no one here. I plop down on the couch and stretch out.

I reach up to remove Ray’s beanie. I totally forgot I had this on. Maybe I should just give it up. There are more fish in the sea, right? Maybe Ray and I are just not meant to be. Sure, it hurts like hell now, but I’ll get over it. I’m strong. I’ve gotten through worse.

I close my eyes for a moment. I’m thinking too much. This is what happens when I drink. I start to remember what I’m trying to ignore. Everything will be better when I wake up. I know Sadie won’t mind if I stay over.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“-Why can’t I say that while you’re awake?”

I twitch as I start to wake up. I hear game noises. I thought I just heard a low voice. Is Sadie playing her new game? I crack open my eyes. I groan as I try to adjust to the bright light. I look at the body sitting next to me. Ray is focused on the T.V., he doesn’t even notice I’m awake.

“Could you turn that down?” I growl. “You could wake the dead with all that noise.”

“Oh, bitchy Melody is back. I’m relieved.” Ray answers, not looking away from the screen. 

“Shut the hell up. What are you doing here?” I rub my throbbing forehead. I glance out the window. It’s still dark out.

“You said we would go to the game room after I opened my present, but you wandered off without me. I managed to find it on my own, though. Aren’t you proud?”

“Hardly.” I roll my eyes. 

“But seriously, are you okay? Did you have a bad dream?” Ray asks.

“Huh? Bad dream? No, I don’t think so,” I shake my head. If it was a bad dream, I would have remembered. “Why?”

“When I came in here, you were crying a bit in your sleep. I didn’t know what to do.” Ray admits.

“That’s a surprise. You never know what to do,” I smirk. “Well… thanks for worrying about me…” I mumble. I almost hope he didn’t hear me.

Ray turns off the game he’s playing and places the controller on the side. He bites his lip. He looks as though he has something to say. Ray dismisses the thought by shaking his head. “Let’s get home. Dustin can drop us off.”

“Dustin’s still here? The party’s not over?” I ask.

“You weren’t asleep that long,” Ray waves his hand. “Let’s go back to my place. I can get some medicine for your head.” Ray helps me off the couch.

I have to get over him.

“That’s okay, Ray. I can just go straight home. I don’t want to bug you.” I fake smile.

Ray frowns. “You don’t bug me. I like having you over.”

“I don’t want to impose. Besides, I need to get home. I pay for the place. Might as well sleep there once in a while.” I laugh.

Ray nods. He still looks unsure. “Okay, if that’s what you want…”

I hand Ray back his beanie. “Thanks for letting me borrow it.”

“Oh, you can-”

I cut him off. “Let’s not keep Dustin waiting.” 

Ray nods. I know he doesn’t understand now. But I should start distancing myself. At least a little bit. I can’t keep hoping for something that will never happen.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I slam my front door. I have to do this. Pretend I didn’t notice the disappointment in his eyes. Ignore the fact that he kept asking if I was okay, and if I was sure I didn’t need him to take care of me. Just forget it all. I have to forget Ray. It’s just not going to happen. 

I drag myself to my bed. I don’t bother to change my clothes. What’s the point? I’m exactly where I am when I met Ray. I’m still alone.

I have to officially break things off with Dustin. It’s not like we were dating, but he needs to know that I’m not interested. He’s a cool friend. I just can’t keep leading him on. All I can focus on is Ray. That’s not fair to Dustin.

It’s probably a good idea to try and avoid going over to Ray’s apartment. I go over there way too much. I depend on his company now. If I’m going to get over him, I have to see him less.

This isn’t what I want to do. This is something that has to happen. I need to let Ray be happy with Sadie… Even if it makes me miserable. I can learn to get over this.

Besides… I have been through worse… 


	8. The Final Decision Pt. 1

“ _Hey, Melody. It’s Ray,_ ” I listen to his message once more. I managed to keep out of contact for a week now. I’m getting better at ignoring his texts. However, when he tried to call, it threw me for a bit of a loop. “ _I’m having some friends come over soon. Some people from work will be here, too. I thought maybe you would like to meet them. There will be free food. And beer. I know you like to drink… Uh… well, that’s the invitation. I hope you show up. Uh… Yeah... So, I’ll talk to you later._ ”

That was yesterday. I really regret not going. I would love to see Ray again, but I’m doing this for him. I don’t want to make things weird between us. Once I’m over him, I’ll talk to him. Besides, I don’t know I can sit and watch him be with Sadie. Not yet. I need a little more time.

I stuff my folder and a pencil in my bag. Today was the orientation for the study abroad program. I can’t wait to meet my hero. I’m also curious as to what he wants to talk about. All of this should push Ray out of my mind. At least for a few hours.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I walk into the lecture hall. The campus is almost empty since it’s winter break. I arrive a few minutes early, so I take a seat near the back. As much as I want to be up front, I’m nervous. What’s that one saying? You never want to meet your heroes? Something like that. I don’t know if I can sit near the front right now.

I feel a tap on my shoulder. I turn around. Ray is sitting in the seat behind me. I blink a few times. Are my eyes going bad? What is Ray doing here?! “Ray?” I squeak.

“Hi.” Ray waves.

“You’re not supposed to be here!” I scold. 

“I just walked in. No one stopped me,” Ray shrugs. “Free country, right?”

“But why are you here?”

“I don’t trust that guy,” Ray nods his head towards the front. I look ahead. Professor Clarke is setting up for the meeting. “This whole thing seems weird to me.”

“Yeah, you mentioned that a few times,” I roll my eyes. “If you’re going to stay, keep quiet. I don’t want to get in trouble because of you.”

Ray steps over the row of chairs and plops into the seat next to me. “I will stay. Thank you.”

I face forward. I am glad to see Ray, but seeing him isn’t helping. I’m supposed to get over him, not fall even harder.

“It’s nice to see you, by the way,” Ray says. “You disappeared off the face of the planet for a while.”

“Did I?” I shrug. “You never texted or anything.” I lie.

“Actually, I did. You didn’t get my texts? What about my voicemail?”

“Nope.” I lie again.

“Huh. Weird,” Ray taps his fingers against the desk. “I wonder why that is?” I simply shrug. 

“Alright,” Professor Clarke clears his throat. This is it. “Let’s make this brief, alright? I’m sure we all want to enjoy the rest of our winter breaks,” A few people chuckle. “We’ll talk about the procedure of going on the plane. I’ll tell you where to meet me. Then, we’ll talk about some rules while you’re under my care. And then you can ask any questions. Good deal?”

“This is going to take forever.” Ray groans.

“Hush,” I whisper. “No one asked you to come.”

Ray rolls his eyes and remains quiet.

The meeting takes no more than an hour. Even though I’m trying to stay away from Ray, I’m glad he was here for me.

Everyone starts packing their notes away and exiting the room. I flip my bag over my shoulder. “Okay,” I take a deep breath. “Here I go.”

“I’m right here if you need me. Just give me the signal, and I’ll grab you, and run.” Ray nods.

“Ray, please.” I shake my head as I walk to the front of the room. I gulp as I approach Professor Clarke. Out of all the talented people that was in the room, why did he want to talk to me? “Professor Clarke?” I clear my throat. He glances up from his papers. “I’m Melody Larson.”

“Ah, Melody!” He smiles. I don’t know why, but it’s a very comforting smile. “It’s so great to meet you. When I saw your portfolio, I knew I had to have you on board. Shall we go talk somewhere? Have you had lunch yet?”

“Actually, I was wondering if we could talk here,” I point towards Ray. “My friend is waiting on me.”

Professor Clarke glances at Ray. “Boyfriend?”

“Oh, god no,” I laugh nervously. “Well, kinda. I mean, he’s my friend. That’s all.” I ramble.

“I see.” Professor Clarke nods.

“So, uh, I don’t mean to jump into this, but what did you want to discuss?” I ask.

Professor Clarke hums. “I’m not quite sure how to go about this myself. I didn’t expect this to be a quick talk.”

“Oh, take as much time as you need! No rush. I just didn’t want to leave Ray by himself.”

“This is completely unprofessional of me. I usually have what I want to say ready,” He sighs. “How are your aunt and uncle doing?”

Why is he asking about them? “Good. I talked to them a few weeks ago,” I answer. “Did you know them?” It would break my heart to know I only got into this program through connections. I’d like to think that I worked hard for this.

“Not quite. I talked more with your parents,” Professor Clarke admits. “Are… uh… are you okay after what happened?”

“Considering it’s been a few years? Yeah, I think I’m fine.” Why is all this relevant? 

“Your mother was a photographer. Your biological mom. Did anyone ever tell you that?”

My eyes grow wide. “You knew my mother, too?”

He looks to the podium, nodding slowly. “She was a good friend of mine.”

“What was she like?” I step closer.

Professor Clarke studies my face. “You look a lot like her,” He smiles. “She was very outgoing. She loved meeting new people. Jaime had a certain glow. You couldn’t frown when she was around.”

“How did you know her? I want to know everything!” I pull up a chair. I never knew my real parents. Professor Clarke could be my last chance to learn something about them.

“We went to high school together. We met in band. She sat next to me and said, “Is this seat taken? It is now. Hi, I’m Jaime.” I was just some shy, dorky kid. We grew very close after that,” He chuckles at the fond memories. “Jaime really sucked at band, though. We had to demote her to the triangle. But she was very fond of photography. She had a passion for photography for as long as I could remember. I’m kinda glad that somehow you have that same passion.”

“My mom’s name is Jaime? That’s pretty,” I smile. “So, you knew her for so long. You know my father? And where are they now?”

Professor Clarke freezes. “Your mother died a few years after you were born, Melody. I’m really sorry to tell you that.” He says in a somber tone.

“Oh…” I lower my head. It’s okay… I never knew her anyway… “What about my dad?”

Professor Clarke looks away. “He’s still alive. He’s… just not sure how to introduce himself to you.”

“Well, he should channel my mom’s energy. She was outgoing, right? He should just come meet me. Can you let him know that? I’d really like to know where I came from,” I ask him. “I’m sorry if that’s a lot to ask… I just have to know.”

Professor Clarke pauses. He seems to be struggling with what he wants to say. “I’m your dad.” He rushes out.

“I’m sorry. I don’t think I heard you correctly,” I shake my head. “Did you just say you were my dad?”

He instantly shrinks back and nods his head. He can’t even look at me.

This isn’t happening. This isn’t real. He’s lying. He has to be. I flip my bag over my shoulder. “Thanks for your time. I need to go.” I start to walk off.

“Wait. Did you want to talk about stuff? I just told you something huge.” Professor Clarke adds.

“I really can’t talk about this right now.” I feel tears brimming around my eyes. Why am I running away? I used to dream about the day I would meet my parents.

Ray is suddenly on alert. He rises out of his seat. “Melody?” He asks as I pass.

“We need to leave. Now.” I hold back a sob. Damn it. Why am I being such a huge baby? I hate crying in front of people and now I’m doing it in front of Ray and my father… That sounded weird to say.

I hear Ray’s footsteps behind me. I rush out of the room. “Hey,” Ray catches my arm and pulls me to the side. “What happened?”

I wrap my hands around his waist and bury my face in his chest.

“What are you doing?” He whispers as I hold in the tears.

“I don’t want anyone to see me cry.” My answer is muffled by his shirt.

I feels his arms wrap around me. “Okay. I’ll be your cover. Go ahead.”

 The tears I was holding back, trickle out. I’m such a girl. Meeting my dad for the first time shouldn’t bother me.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“So, you don’t want to talk about it?” Ray asks, still focused on his game. Yes, I gave in and came over to his apartment. I needed my friend right now.

“Not really…” I curl up on the couch. I have no idea what he’s playing. Video games don’t make sense to me, but watching him play makes me feel relaxed.

“Meeting you father must have been a shock,” Ray comments. “Do you know what you’re going to say to him?”

“Didn’t I just say I didn’t want to talk about it?” I growl.

“Okay, backing off,” Ray sighs. “I’m sorry for being nosey.”

“Thanks.” 

“.. So are you still going on the trip?” Ray can’t help but keep talking.

“Of course,” I give up. Ray is just going to keep talking about it, anyway. “I’ll talk to him eventually. It’s not like he did anything wrong. I was just shocked.”

“Understandable. Need me to come with you if you see him again?” 

“That would be nice,” I admit. “I couldn’t do that alone.”

“You’re leaving in two weeks.” Ray says.

“Yep.” I nod.

Ray remains quiet. It’s hard to know what’s going on in his mind.

“I’ll miss you.” The words slip out before I can stop them.

Ray pauses his game and faces me. “I’ll miss you, too. They have texting in Italy, right? And Skype?”

“Of course… I’ll talk to you every day.” I promise.

“Good. Bring me a plate of pasta or something.”

“That’s racist!” I giggle.

“No. That’s a stereotype. That’s different.” Ray cracks a smile.

“It’s close enough!” I raise my hand to playfully hit his arm. Ray grabs my hand to block the hit. One touch sends a warm wave throughout my body. This isn’t fair… Why did Sadie get to make the first move? It’s obvious that Ray and I have more chemistry. I mean, they don’t even seem like they like each other. “Do you even like Sadie?” My eyes grow wide. No. That didn’t just come out of my mouth. That was supposed to be in my head. Ah, fuck…

“Why do you ask?”

“It’s none of my business. I’m sorry I said something.” I shake my head. What the hell is wrong with my hormones right now?!

“I like Sadie,” Ray releases my hand. “Since we haven’t been able to hang out lately, Sadie has been coming over more.”

So I was standing in the way of their relationship? See… Staying away is the best I can do for Ray. “Are you happy?”

“Of course. I think it’s super cool how into me she is. That’s not easy for me to find.” Ray shrugs.

Why don’t you look right in front of you? I force a smile. “I’m glad you guys are working out so well! See? You won’t miss me too much when I leave.” 

There’s that look again. Ray wants to say something, but he won’t.

I want to ask him what it is. But it’s best if I leave it alone… Besides, why cause more trouble? I still need to learn to stay away.

“I should email Professor Clarke. Maybe we should talk tomorrow. It’s just so weird and exciting, you know?” I change the subject. 

“I’ll come with you,” Ray offers. “Can we go after I get off work?”

“Sure. That works for me,” I nod. I look towards Ray’s T.V. “Aren’t you going to keep playing?” I look back at Ray. There it is. There’s that look. “Ray?”

“Can I tell you something? I don’t want it to ruin things.” Ray blurts out.

Is this what I think it is? “Go on.”

There’s a loud knock on the door. “Raaaaaaaay!” Sadie calls on the other side. “Ready to go? Did you forget our dinner date?”

I frown. I’m so stupid. See? All it took was one sentence to get my hopes up. I decided to get over him, yet here I am, still lingering on his every word.

Ray sighs. “I completely forgot about Sadie…”

“Go. Have fun,” I cross my arms. “I can just leave.”

“But I haven’t seen you in a while.” Ray quickly argues.

“So?” I snap.

“So maybe I missed your company…” Ray’s voice gets softer.

I scoff. “I’m sick of these games…”

“Games?”

Decision made. I need to stay away from Ray. And this time, I need to stick to it. “I’m leaving.”

“Wait. Can we talk first? It’s really important.” Ray suggests.

“I don’t care.” I rip open the front door, revealing Sadie.

“Oh, Melody,” She looks surprised. “Did you want to-”

“No. I don’t want to be anywhere near him.” I don’t let her finish her invitation. I just can’t be around them. I can’t take anymore disappointment today.

“Melody!” Ray calls behind me.

I don’t answer. I keep walking. He doesn’t need me. The longer I stay away, the closer he’ll get to Sadie. I can’t keep interfering in their relationship. Honestly, I’m no help to either of them.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“I’m, uh, really glad you wanted to meet with me so soon,” Professor Clarke says. “I didn’t expect to see you only hours later. I do appreciate us talking.”

I emailed Professor Clarke right after I stormed away from Ray. We agreed to meet at a nearby café. “I had a lot on my mind, Professor.” I admit. There’s a lot on my plate right now. I need to tackle each problem one at a time. I’ve already decided to stay away from Ray. Now, I pretty much have this out of the way.

“Sam,” he says. “You can just call me Sam if you’d like.”

“Okay,” I nod. “I was a little surprised at first, but running won’t solve anything. I want to know what happened.”

“We had you at a young age,” Sam looks down at the table. “We did everything we could to keep you. It just wasn’t possible… There was no way we could keep you and let you have a successful life. That’s all we wanted for you.”

“I can understand that,” I nod. “I’ve had years thinking of all the reasons you gave me away. Most of the time, I thought you hated me,” I admit. “I have to say that I’m a bit relieved that you had good intentions.”

“Of course. We wanted to be in your life once you were ready to know the truth, but…” Sam’s voice trails off. “After Jaime died… I didn’t know what to do… Things changed for me.”

“Is that where Italy comes in?”

Sam chuckles. “I literally ran away. I don’t recommend that.” 

I stir my untouched coffee that sits before me. “… Did you ever think about me?”

Sam nods. “I regretted leaving. How could I not?”

“But everything seemed to work out for you,” I remind him. “You’re successful, live in a beautiful city, and now, more importantly, you got to meet me.” I smirk.

“God, you and your mother. You have the same humor.” He shakes his head.

This is nice. I can almost forget about Ray. “This is supposed to be awkward.”

“You are your mother’s daughter. Jaime always said a situation is only as awkward as you make it.”

“I like that,” I hum. “I may have to steal that from her.”

“Jaime was a clever woman,” Sam sighs. “Want to know why we named you Melody?”

I nod.

“Since we met in band, she wanted your name to have something to do with the arts; music in particular. I suppose you can figure out the rest.”

“It makes sense. I like it,” I say. “I’m terrible with music, though. So, it’s a bit ironic.”

“You can blame your mother for that.” Sam laughs.

“Please, tell me more. What else did my mom ruin for me?” I giggle. This is the first time I’ve actually laughed in about a week. It’s nice to let someone in. This isn’t as bad as I expected it to be. We still have a lot to work on, but I think we’re off to a good start.

Time seems to pass quickly. Sam continues to tell me more stories about my mom. God, I wish I could have met her.

I glance at my phone to check the time. Four missed calls from Ray… “I should get home.” I finally say.

“I’m really glad that this went smoothly,” Sam smiles. “Are you going to get home okay?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine.” I feel a weight being lifted from my shoulders. My parents didn’t hate me. There was nothing wrong with me. It was just a bad situation.

Sam leaves money on the table and we head for the door. I wave goodbye and we go our separate ways. This is a good sign. The trip should be fun. I’m looking forward to it more than I was before. Best part is, I can get away from Ray for a bit.

Let’s be honest… That’s not the best part. But it’s time. I have to move on. Hoping for something to happen is getting old. 

Ray… I really hope you’re happy. If so, then I can start to be happy.

 


	9. The Final Decision Pt. 2

The two weeks have been quiet. No text or call from Ray. I was right. He didn’t need me. He has Sadie.

Sadie has been talking to me less at work. She’s still her usual cheery self, but something seems different. That’s fine. Maybe she’s still mad at me after I accidentally snapped at her. I get it, but why avoid me? I’m trying to stay away so they can be happy.

I walk into the break room. Usually, I would spend my lunch breaks with Sam, but not today. I need to talk things out with Sadie before I leave tomorrow. I’ll be gone the entire semester. “Hey,” I greet her as I sit at the table. She offers a light smile. “Can we talk?”

“Actually, my break is almost over,” Sadie stands up. “Sorry. Can it wait?”

“You just started your break. I’d rather talk about it now,” I insist. Sadie sighs and sits back down. “I know you’re angry with me,” I start. “You never show it, but I noticed you’ve been acting differently around me. I’m sorry about what happened. I didn’t mean to snap. I was having a rough day.”

Sadie drums her fingers against the table. Her demeanor has completely changed. “That’s what you’re sorry for?”

I tilt my head. “Is there something else I should be sorry for?”

Sadie crosses her arms and looks away. “You know.”

“Sadie, why can’t you talk to me? Why is this a problem now?”

Sadie face changes to confusion. “You _don’t_ know?”

“What am I supposed to know?” I shrug.

“Oh,” Sadie’s face dropped. “He… he didn’t say anything to you?”

“Sadie, tell me.” I lean forward.

“Ray broke up with me.” Sadie says in a quiet voice.

“What?!” I shout.

“He said he didn’t like me,” She says. “He tried. But… I wasn’t what he wanted.”

Ray… “Well… What does that have to do with me?”

Sadie keeps her eyes glued to the table. “I knew,” Sadie admits. “I knew from the beginning that he didn’t like me. Remember our double date? He told me that night,” Sadie pauses. “I knew who he really wanted. But I asked him to stay, at least until she came around. I thought… I thought maybe he would grow attached to me. I liked him so much. I just wanted him to like me back…”

“Sadie,” my eyes grow wide. “What does this have to do with me?”

“He wants you, Melody,” Sadie’s eyes start to water. “After he broke up with me, I was sure you guys were going to date right away. I wasn’t ready to face that.”

I bite back a smile. I can’t believe it. “What makes you think I would do that to you?” I ask. I probably would, as terrible as that sounds. But… I’d at least talk to her about it first.

“I would hit you if you didn’t,” Sadie forces a smile. “It’s obvious that you guys deserve each other. I was… jealous of that…” Sadie’s smile begins to fade. “I was selfish. I just wanted what you had. I wanted that connection you had with Ray. But we were doomed from the start.”

This whole time… Ray wanted me. I knew it. I wasn’t just imagining all those times. “So… what now?”

“You should ask Ray out.”

“I can’t do that!” I argue.

“Yes, you can, Melody. And I think you can make Ray happier than I ever could.” Sadie says in a spiteful tone. I can tell she’s trying to stay neutral in this situation, but she’s in too much pain.

“You don’t get it,” I shake my head. “I can’t do that to you.”

Silence fills the break room.

“I know you didn’t want any of this to happen. You would never set out to hurt me,” Sadie closes her eyes. “But there’s no denying what’s already happened, right? Maybe you didn’t mean to hurt anyone, but you did. I understand that it wasn’t on purpose,” Sadie stands. “Talk to Ray. I’m not going to lie, it’s going to hurt me. But nothing is going to keep you two apart, right?” She starts walking away. “You know,” She stops in the doorway. “Melody, I do want to thank you for trying. I know you tried to stay away from Ray. Even though it failed, I appreciate the effort. I still want to be friends. I just… I just need time.” She walks out of the break room, leaving me alone.

I shouldn’t be smiling right now. I should be upset that my friend is hurt. But damn it, I can’t wipe this grin off my face. 

I need to talk to Ray.

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Instead of taking the bus home, I rush to Ray’s apartment. My mind is racing. I don’t even know what I’m supposed to say. I take a deep breath. This is it. We’re going to talk, make up, and everything will be great. We can be together.

But… I’m leaving tomorrow.

Why did I have to find all this out now? And will Ray even want to see me after what I did? I stopped talking to him. I just wanted what’s best for him. I’m not sure he would see it that way.

I can’t just ignore this for a few months. This needs to be dealt with. But… what’s going to happen after I knock on this door.

The door creeks open. Ray stands on the other side. He cocks an eyebrow. “How long are you going to stand outside my door?”

“How did you know I was here?”

“I saw your shadow under my door,” Ray chuckles as he opens the door wider. “Want to come in?”

I nod, taking small steps inside. I still have no idea what to say to him.

Ray closes the door. “What finally brings you over?”

I gulp as I lean against the wall. I better stay near the door. Just in case I need to leave. “I talked to Sadie today.”

Ray crosses his arms and looks to the side. “What did she say?”

“That you broke up with her,” I take a deep breath. “Do you want to tell me why?”

“Drop the shit. You know.” He says in a soft voice.

“I do know,” I step closer. “And did you ever think that maybe I felt the same way?”

Ray pauses before answering. With shaky hands, he holds my waist. “There were moments where I couldn’t hide it,” Ray admits. “I was going to tell you. But I knew that wasn’t fair,” Ray leans closer. “It is you that I want. I knew that since the day I bumped into you and made you fall,” Ray smiles, resting his head against my forehead. My stomach begins to flip. He’s so close to me. “I’ve liked you from the beginning. I even love the way we fight. It’s hard to piss me off and yet you do it so easily. I don’t know how you get these kind of emotions out of me, but I’m glad that you do.”

“So, where do that leave us?” I tilt my head.

“We’re standing in my doorway.” Ray teases.

“Idiot. What does that mean for… us?”

Ray doesn’t answer. He hands are on either side of my face and he draws me closer. I let out a small gasp once his lips press against mine. This is our first kiss. It’s gentle, it’s sweet, but that doesn’t mean it’s less exciting.

Ray pulls away and sighs. “You’re leaving tomorrow.”

“Yeah…” I slide my hands on his chest.

“Hmmm…” Ray bites his lip. “It’s not the way I planned it.”

“Should I have waited until I got back?” I shift my weight. Is he regretting what’s happening?

Ray shakes his head and slips his coat over his shoulders. “Let’s go.”

“Where are we going?” I ask as I follow Ray out of his apartment.

“I’m sure we have a lot to talk about, but I’m hungry so we’re going to get food.” Ray answers.

I nod and walk beside Ray. This is a date, right?

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I silently sip on my soda as Ray browses the menu. He hasn’t said a word about the kiss. He’s acting like it never happened. I’m still feeling giddy over the whole thing. How can he be so calm?

“Oh, that sounds good,” Ray hums to himself. I let out a small huff, indicating that I’m not happy. “Really?” Ray places down his menu. “We just got here. What did I do this time?”

“How can you think about food at a time like this?” I mumble under my breath.

“Because I’m hungry and we’re in a restaurant?” Ray answers sarcastically.

I puff out a cheek, refusing to look him in the eye.

“Melody,” Ray lets out a sigh. “What’s on your mind?”

“I’m too excited to eat.” I cross my arms.

“You don’t sound excited.” Ray points out.

“I am!” I answer in a gruff tone. “I’m happy!” I frown. I take a moment to think about how contradictory that was.

Ray bites his lip to hide a laugh. “Is this how you act on dates? You’re so confusing.”

“Ah!” I gasp. “So this is a date?”

Ray’s face drops into a frown. He gives me a “what the hell do you think?” look.

I smile sheepishly. “I just don’t understand how you seem so normal,” I say in a soft voice. “I feel like there’s some kind of butterfly invasion in my tummy,” I admit. “It hasn’t stopped fluttering since our kiss.”

Ray grins as he looks away. It’s almost like a shy smile. “It was just a kiss, Melody.” Ray answers modestly. 

I pout. “Not to me!” I feel the blood rush to my cheeks. Hush, Melody. Let’s not scare him away already.

Ray lets out a soft laugh. He reaches his hand across the table to hold my hand. “Can you not? You’re making me blush and it’s not manly.”

I feel a smile escape. “I’m sorry,” I rub my thumb across his hand. “This just feels like a dream to me. It’s so unreal.”

A sudden pinch on my hand causes me to flinch and pull it away. “Ow!” I rub my hand. “Did you just pinch me?!” I shout.

“Now you know you’re not dreaming. You’re welcome.” Ray smirks.

“I’m going to shout out that you’re abusing me! You could go to jail, you know.” I cross my arms.

“You wouldn’t do that to me. You’re too curious as to where this is going to lead us. You wouldn’t jeopardize it on a false accusation.” Ray challenges me.

I sigh. He’s right. “I hate you,” I lean closer on the table. “So, what exactly is happening here?”

Ray rolls his eyes. “I thought you were kidding. Okay, we are on a date. And it’s going well considering neither one of us are trying to kill each other, but I suppose the night is still young. That could change very easily,” Ray explains. “We are going to keep doing this dating thing, if you want to. We keep doing this until we get sick of each other, or we die. Pretty simple.”

“I know what dating is, stupid! I just… I don’t know! This happened too easily.” I cross my arms.

“Oh, it’s not going to be easy,” Ray reminds me. “I’m going to be the most sarcastic person you ever met and you’re going to be a pain in my ass.”

“Right. I forgot about that… Hey! I am not a pain in the ass!” I argue.

Ray throws his head back in laughter as I try to argue. He’s so mean to me! How can he call me a pain in the ass on the first date?

Still, I wouldn’t change this moment. Everything is as perfect as it should be.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It’s six in the morning. I shouldn’t be awake this early. I’m waiting by my class near the terminal. We start boarding in less than an hour.

Ray is still asleep and I really don’t want to wake him. I would like to talk to him. He would know what to say. I don’t know why, but I’m nervous. This is a once in a life time opportunity and I’m going with my biological father. Everything is going my way right now.

I look around at the classmates I’m going to be with for the next few months. Everyone seems to be acquainted already. 

Sam sits next to me after he makes sure all the students are accounted for. “You look nervous.”

“Maybe just a bit,” I admit. “I’m leaving behind my friends. I don’t know anyone here.”

“You know me! Hey, we can hang out!” Sam beams.

“Yeah, hanging out in Italy with your father. That’s a sure fire way to look like a loser… No offense.” I wince.

Sam shakes his head. “None taken. You slipped up and called me your father. I’ll take that as a huge compliment.”

I stare at the screen of my phone. I really should have snapped a picture of Ray on our date. That would get me through this. I don’t care if it’s lame. I would love to see his face right now.

“Expecting a call?” Sam asks. “Ray?”

“How’d you guess?” I decide not to deny anything.

“I had a feeling,” Sam shrugs. “Maybe you like him a little more than just a friend?”

“You’re a bit late, Sam. Ray and I went on our first date last night.” I inform him.

“Well, damn. Leave me in the dark, why don’t you?” Sam teases.

“It just happened! Of course I was going to tell you,” I assure him. “I suppose it was obvious to everyone else but us.”

“It really was. That boy was giving me a stare down the first time we met.”

“He didn’t mean to do that.” I hope that doesn’t make things awkward when Ray officially meets Sam.

“Oh, he did. But, I can’t be too mad. He was worried about you. That’s a good thing.” Sam nods.

I let out a breath of relief. At least he’s not mad. 

My phone begins to vibrate and Ray’s number flashes on the screen. My heart leaps as I answer. “Hello?”

“Hi. Did you leave for the airport already?” Ray asks in a sleepy tone. He must have just woken up.

“Yeah. I’m by the terminal now.” I say.

“Good,” He yawns. “At least you got there safe.”

“Yeah, now I just have to survive the flight.” I lean back in my chair. I feel more relaxed talking to Ray. I look beside me. Sam is no longer next to me. He probably wanted to give me and Ray some space. 

“It’s only a twelve hour flight. Piece of cake,” Ray teases. “I have to be a work at ten. I have plenty of time to talk to you before you go.”

“Yeah,” I look over. It appears that everyone is starting to board. “But it looks like I have to go.”

“Oh,” Ray says in a disappointed tone. “Hey, there’s wifi on the plane. We can skype until I have to leave for work.”

“No. I can’t have you do that. You should sleep,” I insist as I collect my carry on. “I will call you once I’m off the plane.”

“But I do want to talk to you.” I can hear the protest in his voice. But I can also hear how close to sleep he is.

“I’m sure you can live,” I promise him. I start lining up. “But I really have to go.”

I hear a sigh. “Okay. Try to keep yourself busy while you’re on the plane. Hey, if you want, why don’t you check out Achievement Hunter? You can hear my voice the entire flight.”

“What a dream,” I say in a sarcastic tone. “I’ll consider it. But why would I listen your voice on the internet when I have to put up with you in real life?”

“Ouch. I see how it is. I guess we’re breaking up already,” Ray laughs. He pauses before considering. “Have a safe flight. Alright, Melody?”

“I will,” I nod. “I’ll miss you.”

“Hey, you’re not dying.”

“Asshole. Can’t you say you’ll miss me, too?!” I shout.

“What’s the difference? You ignored me up until yesterday. Won’t it be the same?”

“Low blow,” I scoff. “So… I guess I’ll talk to you later.” I really don't want to go...

Ray hesitates before answering. “Yeah. Bye.”

“Bye, Ray.” I hang up the phone. I just hung up, and I miss his voice already. I think I will watch some Achievement Hunter. Then, maybe I can understand his job a bit more. “Alright. Italy, here I come!” I whisper to myself as I enter the plane.

Honestly, I need to stop being a dork in public.

 


	10. Benvenuti in Italia.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If there are any readers who speak Italian, feel free to help me correct any mistakes I could have made. I've been doing a lot of research for this story and the only translator I have is Google Translator. As we all know, that's not always accurate. You have been warned. I'm not perfect.

Today is the first official day of lessons. We are staying at a local college. There is a special wing specifically for study abroad students. There are people from other states, too. There are so many students. I’m really starting to feel out of place. The teachers gave everyone a day to adjust to the new setting. 

“You nervous?” Ray asks over Skype. I’m glad video chatting exists. I like being able to see him. It’s like he’s with me.

“A little bit,” I admit. “It’s about to be seven. Class is starting soon. I suppose it won’t be so bad since Sam is here.”

“How does that work? He’s a painter. Why is he teaching a photography class?” Ray wonders as he adjusts his laptop next to him. He flips off his light and throws the covers over him. He’s tired. I can tell. As soon as we get off, he’s going straight to sleep.

“It turns out there was a change in the program. I assumed it would just be our group and that Sam would be teaching us. There are actually other students from different parts of the US and everyone is separated by different subjects,” I explain. “Sam is teaching painting. I get to meet my teacher and class today. Sam is in charge of watching all the Texas students, though, so at least I’ll still get to see him.” Poor Sam. He has his work cut out for him. Keeping an eye on thirty college students in a new setting? Plus, he’s not only a teacher, he’s one of the people in charge of the program. Must be tough. But I’m sure he’s used to it. It is his job after all.

“Well, don’t be late on your first day. Try not to do the bitchy Melody thing. Try and make some friends.” Ray teases.

“Hey, I know how to make friends! I’m a social person!” I pout. “Get your ass to bed. It’s midnight back home.” I scold.

“I’m well aware of the time. I can read a clock,” Ray rolls his eyes. “Good luck at school.”

“I may need it.” I sigh.

“You’ll do fine,” Ray assures me. “Good morning.”

“Good night.” I wave before disconnecting. All three of my roommates were gone before I woke up. I never got to properly introduce myself. I spent my free day texting Ray and unpacking. They must have went to explore Florence like everyone else.

I close the door and lock the door behind me. I think we’re meeting in the main courtyard for the first day of class. The photography class doesn’t have a class room yet. Not like we need it. The class will mostly take place off campus.

I unzip my coat as I step outside. It’s unseasonably warm today. That’s probably why we’re outside.

It’s a short five minute walk to the main courtyard. There’s a group of students with cameras. Call it a hunch, but I think I found my class.

“Ciao!” A tall, thin woman at the front of the group speaks. She looks around Sam’s age. She has long dark hair and glasses that shield her light brown eyes. “My name is Valentina Ricci. I will be your photography guide through this wonderful city of art.”

At least she knows how to make an introduction. I’m a little less nervous. I stand near the front. I want to make sure I don’t miss anything.

“For our first class, you won’t be required to take any pictures. We’re going to start off by getting to know the class.” Ms. Ricci says.

I look around. Wait, did they pass out these cameras? Every camera is different…

“Hey,” A male student standing next to me leans in and whispers. “Good think you forgot your camera. Looks like we don’t need them today.” He flashes a smile. He pushes his wavy brown hair out of his emerald green eyes. 

“Wait, all these aren’t the schools cameras?” I whisper back.

“Of course not. Do you not have one?” He tilts his head.

I could lie. “Uh, no… I don’t…” But then again, I’m a terrible liar. “I kinda can’t afford one.”

“Excuse me,” Ms. Ricci says, catching our attention. She’s staring right at me. “Perfect example. When I’m talking, everyone should listen. Anyway…” She continues to lecture on about the rules as some classmates snicker.

“Wow. Rude. We aren’t the only ones talking. My name is Tyson, by the way.” He introduces himself.

“Melody.” I nod and face front. I’d rather not get in anymore trouble. 

After two hours of talking, Ms. Ricci releases us. “Now, tomorrow, bring your cameras. We’re meeting in front of the university. We will be taking a bus to the Florence Cathedral.”

I start to walk away. I feel a hand wrap around my forearm. “Oh, wait!”

I turn around. That guy... What’s his name again? Tyson, I think, has his hand on my arm. “Yes?” I tilt my head. I have to go soon. Sam wanted to drive me somewhere.

“Are you busy? The photography class is going to meet up later. There’s a club in town and we were going to check it out. You’ll be there, right?” Tyson asks.

I think for a moment. A chance to party? How could I turn that down? I’m sure I’ll have time. “Yeah, definitely!” I nod.

“Cool,” Tyson smiles. “It’s called Space. It’s just a short walk from campus. I’ll see you then.”

“Okay. Bye.” I wave goodbye and start heading towards the parking lot. 

Sam is waiting near the campus entrance. “Ah, there you are! How was class?”

“Short, boring, and embarrassing,” I groan. “Everyone has a camera but me.”

“Oh, is that so?” Sam asks as we approach the car. “Maybe you should get a camera soon.”

“Yeah, no kidding,” I sigh as I hop in the front seat. “So, where are you taking me?”

“My house,” he answers. “There’s someone I want you to meet.”

“Oh?” He has my attention now. A wife, perhaps? That’s fine, I guess. It has been years since my mom died. 

We drive in a comfortable silence. I debate on shooting Ray a text. Then, I remember he just went to sleep. It would be stupid just to wake him up just to talk to me. Damn, this time difference is going to take some getting used to.

Sam pulls up in front of a small house. “We’re here.” He unbuckles his seat belt and steps out of the car. I follow him, not quite sure what to expect. Sam unlocks the front door and we walk into the house. I look around. The first room is a living room. There’s a kitchen right across and around the corner, there appears to be a hallway.

“Hmm… he should be awake by now.” Sam thinks out loud.

He? Is he gay? That’s not a problem, of course.

“Come this way,” Sam motions me to follow him. We walk through the living room and down the hall. Sam stops in front of a room door and knocks.

“Si accomodi.” A hoarse voice answers.

Sam and I walk in. It’s a bedroom. There’s an old man in the room. His eyes are drawn directly to me. “…Jaime?”

“No, papà,” Sam shakes his head. “Questo è Melody. Ricordi? Te l’ho detto. Lei stava arrivando.”

The old man looks surprised. “Oh.”

I step farther into the room. Sam called him papa. So, this is my grandfather? “Sam,” I whisper. “I don’t speak Italian. How can I properly introduce myself?”

“I can speak English.” The old man answers. “Melody, come here, dear.”

I approach the side of the bed. He takes my hand and kisses the back of my hand. “It is very odd. You look just like your mother. This took me by surprise.”

I really hate to sound racist… But he sounds like a stereotypical mobster. Well, if he’s my grandfather, I can say that, right? Probably not.

“I am Durante Gallo. You can call me whatever you are comfortable with.” He says.

I kinda want to call him Pop Pop… “It’s nice to meet you.” I nod. Wait… Gallo? Sam’s last name is Clarke.

“So,” I shift from one foot to the other. “How did you two end up here?” I ask.

“This is your grandfather,” Sam says. Well, at least I figured out that part. “This is your mother’s father.”

Mo\m… “Oh.” Is all I can manage to say.

“Sam, fai vedere la foto.” Pop Pop (can I call him that? I think I will. Just not to his face) says.

“Lo farò dopo,” Sam replies. “ Dove e la camera di Jaime?” I really wish I knew Italian. I can’t understand a damn word they’re saying.

“Cerca tuo stanza.” Pop Pop crawls out of bed and reaches for a cane.

“Melody, why don’t you wait in the living room? You can watch T.V.” Sam say, leading me out of the room.

“Oh, let me fix some food.” Pop Pop starts heading for the kitchen.

“Dad, don’t,” Sam groans. Despite his protests, Pop Pop shuffles into the kitchen. “On second thought, why don’t you keep an eye on your Grandpa. I’m worried he might hurt himself.”

“Sure.” I nod. But honestly, how much trouble can he get into? It’s just lunch. What could he possibly mess up? I enter the kitchen. Pop Pop takes a pot and places it onto the stove. “What are you making?” I assume some kind of pasta. We are in Italy, after all.

“Oh, chicken noodle soup.” He answers.

Ah. Not what I was expecting, but cool. “Do you need help?”

“No, no. I got this. You can just relax,” Pop Pop shakes his head. “Hmmm...” He squints. “Where did I put the can?” He looks around. He reaches up and grabs a can from the shelf. It... it wasn’t chicken noodle. It was a can of peas. Okay, at least peas are healthy. Maybe he changed his mind?

He opens the can and dumps the peas into the pot. “Now, we need salt.” Pop Pop picks up a small container labeled “sugar”.

“Um...” I have to think quick. Before he puts a spoonful of sugar into the peas, I tap him on the shoulder. “Where would I find the T.V. remote?”

“Oh,” Pop Pop places down the container of sugar. “I think it’s in the living room.” He starts to wander away from the kitchen.

I quickly switch the peas out into a bowl and replace them with chicken soup. I put back the container of sugar and put salt in it’s place.

“I found it.” Pop Pop shuffles back into the kitchen. 

“Thank you.” I nod. I start backing out of the kitchen. He turns on the stove and adds a pinch of salt to the soup. Perfect. 

“I’ll watch T.V. with you while we wait for soup to be done.” Pop Pop follows me out of the kitchen. I don’t know if he should leave the soup alone, but I can’t tell him what to do.

We sit on the couch. It’s some kind of Italian comedy. I can’t understand what the hell is happening. Pop Pop occasionally laughs and repeats a line that he found funny. I laugh lightly along with him. I really wish I understood the jokes.

“Melody,” Sam finally emerges from a room. “I found it.”

“Found what?” I stand up.

“It’s a bit outdated, but I suppose this is better than not having one at all,” Sam hands me a camera. It’s certainly not the latest model, but vintage is freaking awesome. “This was your mother’s. She bought it just a few months before she passed. I brought it to Italy with me. I couldn’t bear to leave it.”

“This was Mom’s?” I inspect the camera. My mom held this is her hands. This belonged to her. And now… “You’re giving it to me?”

“I don’t think Jaime would want it in anyone else’s hands,” Sam admits. “She would be horrified if I kept it. You will take perfect care of it.”

“I don’t know what to say… Thank you. So much.” I stutter.

Sam smiles, before his face changes to horror. “Is something burning?”

Uh oh…

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sam drops me off by the dorms. “Sorry about lunch,” He apologizes. “Your grandfather is pretty much in good health. He just forgets sometimes. And he refuses to wear his glasses. So, that makes it difficult sometimes.”

“It’s okay. The pizza made up for it,” I assure him as I step out of the car. Ray loves pizza… I wonder what he had for lunch. “Thanks for the ride.” I close the door and rush up to my room. Next time I’m over, I need to ask more about my mom. And maybe ask how Sam ended up taking care of Pop Pop.

Once I reach my room, I start getting ready to hang out at the club. My room is, once again, empty. I’m starting to doubt that my roommates even exist. 

My phone starts to ring. I check the number. It’s Ray. “Hey.” I smile.

“Hey,” He greets. I practically melt at the sound of his voice. “How was your day?”

“It was… okay?” I shrug. “It started off kinda boring. I didn’t really meet any new people. But get this; I met my grandfather.”

“Oh cool. Tell me about that.”

“He’s my mother’s dad. And he almost burned the house down… Also, I’m not quite sure why Sam is living with him,” I explain as I leave my room. Now, I just need to find this club. “Oh, and I got my Mom’s camera.”

“That doesn’t sound like a boring day,” Ray chuckles. “It beats my day. The most exciting thing that happened to me was getting free pizza for lunch. Oh, and I got to leave early.”

I giggle. “Pizza is good. That’s what I had for lunch, too.” I really missed hearing his voice. I want to see him… It’s only been one day. This semester is going to be tough without him…

I just walked off campus. The club is supposed to be nearby. Maybe I should have looked it up.

“Oh, hey, so I checked out Achievement Hunter on my flight,” I add. “Super cute. It kept me happy the entire flight.”

“You realize you could have been talking to me instead of just listening to my videos like a creep.” Ray teases.

“You’re less annoying when you aren’t trying to piss me off. You’re way cuter when you play games.” I giggle.

“Is that so,” I hear Ray chuckle. “Is that why you would come over and watch my play video games?”

“That may have something to do with it,” I feel myself blush. “You get this really concentrated look on your face. It’s too adorable.”

“Hey, what did I tell you about making me blush? It’s not manly.” Ray scolds playfully.

“I’m sorry,” I laugh. “I can’t help it, though. Anyway, what’s up?”

“It’s about nine at night there, right? I figured we can talk until you fall sleep.” Ray offers.

“Hey! Melody!” A voice calls behind me. I turn around. It’s the guy from earlier, Tyson. “Hey,” He catches up to me. “I’m about to head to Space the club. Mind if I walk with you?”

“I’m sorry. I’m actually on the phone. I don’t want to be rude and ignore you.” I pull the phone away from my ear.

The line goes quiet. “Melody,” Ray finally speaks. “Who’s that?” I’m relieved that he doesn’t sound angry. It’s not in Ray’s nature to get jealous. At least, I don’t think it is.

“It’s someone from my class. I’m actually on my way to hang out with everyone. Here’s to hoping I make new friends.”

“I know you will,” Ray assures me. “I guess I won’t get in your way. Go have fun.”

“Really? You don’t mind?” I ask. I want to talk to him... But I can’t turn down a chance to meet new friends.

“As long as you call me when you get home, I’ll be good. Go have a fun night.” 

I can’t help but smile. I really like him. “Thank you. I’ll talk to you later.”

“You better.” Ray chuckles before hanging up.

“Okay,” I turn to Tyson. “Lead the way.”

“So, who was that?” Tyson asks as we start walking towards the club.

“Oh, that’s my…” Wait… he’s my boyfriend, right? We went on one date. Is it okay to call him that? “My boyfriend.” I finally say. Hey, Ray will never know that I’m calling him my boyfriend out here.

Tyson’s lips curl into a small smile. “You don’t sound so sure about that.”

“Whoa, pal. You barely know me,” I smirk. “Don’t try analyzing me. You won’t get anywhere.”

“Sorry,” He puts up his hands in defense. “Let’s try that again. Hi, my name is Tyson. I’m from Minnesota and I love photography.”

“As you know, I’m Melody,” I reintroduce myself. “I’m from Texas and I, too, love photography.”

“Good. The class would be pointless for us if we didn’t.” Tyson jokes.

I giggle as we arrive to the club.

“Here we are,” Tyson holds open the door. “Space. Try not to float away.”

“Wow, you are full of cheesy jokes.” I roll my eyes and walk in.

“That’s who I am,” Tyson shrugs. “At least it’s a good conversation starter.”

“Can’t argue with you there.” I shout over the music.

“Come on,” Tyson grabs my wrist. “I’ll introduce you to some of the students I met.”

“Wow, Mr. Popularity over here.” I tease.

“You know it,” Tyson lets out a soft laugh. “I think I see some of our classmates over here.” I follow Tyson to the bar area.

“Tyson!” A girl waves. She hops off the bar stool and wanders over to us. Her black hair reached her mid-back. Her light brown eyes gleam in the light. “I was wondering when you would show up!” She sounds excited. A little too excited. I sense a bit of a crush.

“Kaci, this is Melody,” Tyson directs her attention to me. “She’s in our photography class.”

“Oh, hi.” The woman, Kaci, nods. 

“Hey,” I nod back. “Where are you from?”

“New York.” Kaci answers. Ray is from New York.

Oh… Ray…

“Tyson,” Kaci takes his hand. “We have been waiting for you. We should go dance!”

Tyson shakes his hand away. “Actually, I wanted to hang a bit with Melody and introduce her to everyone.”

“It’s fine,” I interrupt him. “I can introduce myself. Go dance. Don’t let me stop you.” 

Tyson frowns as Kaci smiles.

“See?” She claps. “She’ll be fine! Let’s go!”

“Okay, okay,” Tyson sighs. “Melody, at least introduce yourself to Ira,” Tyson points to a girl setting at the bar. “She’s a bit shy.”

‘Yeah, tell her to lighten up,” Kaci adds. “She’s a bit of a downer.”

I frown. I shouldn’t say anything, but I can’t stop myself. “That’s not nice,” I cross my arms. “I’m sure she’s just not used to this kind of scene like we are. We should try to ease her into this.”

“Good luck with that.” Kaci rolls her eyes and pulls Tyson away. I don’t think she liked that I said that.

“I’ll be back!” Tyson yells over the crowd of people.

I make my way to the bar and sit next to the girl Tyson pointed out. I get a closer look at her. Her mess of curls is pulled into a ponytail. Her blue eyes are hidden behind smudgy, thick rimmed glasses. Her baggy clothing hide what appears to be a small frame.

“Hello,” I scoot closer. She looks up. “Are you Ira? I’m Melody.”

“Melody,” She repeats. “I am Ira. Did someone send you over here?”

“Yeah. Tyson wanted me to meet you.” I nod.

“Oh,” Ira hums. “Why is that?”

Huh? “Uh, he wanted me to meet everyone in our photography class. I wanted to start here.”

“I see,” Ira looks back down to her drink. “Uh… so, you’re in the photography class?”

I just said that. “Yep.” I nod.

Ira nods along with me and takes a sip of her drink. She then avoids eye contact. Wow, rude…

Wait, not rude. She must be shy! Come on, Melody, you know what to do. “So, where are you from?” That seems like a safe question to ask for now.

Ira looks back up and looks engaged again. “I’m from Nevada. What about you?”

“Texas.”

“Oh, that’s exciting,” She seems more interested. “What part of Texas?”

“Austin. I’ve lived there my whole life.”

Her eyes grow wide. “Have you heard of Rooster Teeth? Their company is located in Austin!”

“No,” I shake my head. “Sorry, I haven’t…. Oh, wait! Rooster Teeth… Like, Achievement Hunter?”

“Yes,” She nods. “So, you have heard of their work! Oh, I’m such a huge fan!” She grins. Her smiles starts to fade and she retreats back into her shy shell. “I’m sorry. I tend to nerd out occasionally.”

“Don’t be sorry for something you’re passionate about,” I slam my hand on the table. “Yell it to the skies! Proclaim that you are a nerd and you love it!”

Ira shrinks back. “Yelling will draw attention…”

Okay, Melody, pull it back a bit. “So, you’re a fan of Achievement Hunter, huh?” I try to keep the conversation going. “Who’s your favorite member?”

“Oh, it would have to be Ray,” a small blush creeps across her face. “He seems to be just like me. He loves video games, and he’s quiet and… he’s just awesome.”

I try to hide a smile. Oh, wait until Ray hears about this. “It’s funny that you say that,” I start pulling out my phone. I can call Ray and she can talk to him on the phone. I can provide her the chance to meet her favorite Achievement Hunter.

“Oh no…” Ira pulls her hood over her head.

“What’s wrong?” I look behind me. Tyson and Kaci are heading back over.

“My roommates,” She sighs. “Tyson is nice enough… But Kaci can be a bit… forceful.”

“Don’t hide,” I pull her hood off. “They already know it’s you.”

“Hey,” Tyson is standing by my side. “Melody, have we gotten the awkward turtle out of her shell yet?”

I notice Ira’s eyes narrow. She goes back to her drink.

“Working on it,” I tell him. “But I don’t think she particularly wants to be here.”

Ira’s face begins to soften. She looks relieved. Yep, that’s it. She doesn’t want to be here.

“Well, I think she should at least dance once,” Kaci presses on. “Come on, drag her out here.” Kaci tugs on Tyson.

“Actually, I want to step outside for a moment.” Ira says. I’m the only one that can hear her.

“Go on. Maybe we’ll join later,” I wave them off. “We’re going to get some air for a moment.”

Tyson keeps his eyes on me. “You sure?”

“Yeah.” I nod. 

Unsure about my answer, Kaci has to drag Tyson away, once again.

“Thanks for that,” Ira lets out a sigh of relief. She hops off the bar stool. “Come on.” I follow Ira outside. The warm wind whips back my hair as we step outside. “Ah, it’s so nice,” Ira comments. She seems a little more comfortable. She pulls out a pack of cigarettes and offers me one.

I shake my head. “I quit back in high school.” 

“Oh, will this bother you? I don’t have to…”

“Do whatever you want,” I assure her. “It won’t bother me a bit. Is this what you came out here to do?”

“Yeah. The crowds were starting to stress me out,” She lights a cigarette and inhales. “It was making me feel claustrophobic.”

“Clubs aren’t your thing, huh?” I sit on a stone ledge.

“While I’d rather be doing something else, I guess I don’t mind them,” Ira sits next to me, taking a long drag. “I occasionally go with my friends back home. I’m usually the quiet one in my group.”

“I see,” I nod. “So, what brought you here tonight?”

“Tyson has be fucking dragging me around town since I got here,” Ira grumbles. “He means well. I know he does, but I would rather be in my room. Or at least, I’d rather be away from Kaci.”

“You know, for a quiet girl, you’re very opinionated.” I chuckle.

“I quiet, true. That just gives you time to think,” Ira points out. “I only feel comfortable talking around you. Weird. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I’m honored,” I smile. Yesssss, popular Melody is back in action. It’s been a while since I made a quick friend. “So, what’s the deal with Kaci?”

“If you haven’t noticed yet, you will eventually.” Ira shakes her head. “She’s… loud. And rude. And she has to have her way. Notice how she’s been clinging to Tyson’s side?”

I nod. 

“She’s been like that since they met. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure that out,” Ira giggles. “But of course, Tyson is a natural Casanova. If he wanted her, it would have happened already.”

“You know all of this in just two days?”

Ira nods. “What can I say? I’m a shadow. A silent observer. Whatever you want to call it.” Ira remains silent as she finishes her cigarette. I see. 

So, silent moments aren’t awkward with her. Good. I don’t have to worry about constantly keeping conversation.

“You’re really cool, Melody,” Ira comments. “I hate to ask this, but I’d much rather stick with you than Tyson and Kaci. Mind if I hang around more often?”

“I would love that. Consider me as a new friend,” I stand up. “I’ve been looking for one, anyway.”

“Same,” Ira puts out her cigarette and sighs. “Do we have to go back in?”

“We can leave if you want. I just want to let them know that we’re leaving. They’re your roommates, right? Let’s not have them worry.”

“Fine.” Ira agrees.

“We can head back to my room. If my roommates aren’t back, maybe you can spend the night. I haven’t met them yet.” I offer.

“That’s weird. You know, we haven’t met our fourth roommate yet,” Ira hums. “Tyson was so busy dragging us around town, we never got to meet them.”

“In that case, maybe I’ll steal the extra bed in your room,” I giggle. “I don’t like sleeping alone.”

We walk over to Kaci and Tyson, who are taking a small break from dancing. “Ready to hit the dance floor?” Tyson asks, looking directly at me.

“Nah, actually, Ira and I were about to leave,” I give him an apologetic look. “Maybe next time?”

“Oh, where are you guys going? We can leave, too. There are still cool places to hang out.” Tyson insists.

“We’re heading back to the dorms,” I shake my head. “It’s been a busy day. We’re going to just chill for the rest of the night and talk some more.”

“What better way to get over a busy day than to hang out and party?” Kaci jumps in. “Come on, don’t be lame. I thought you were going to be fun.”

I glare. I don’t think she meant anything mean by it, but I seriously don’t think that was called for. “I am fun. It’s just been a long day.”

“Let me walk you guys back,” Tyson offers. “It is getting late and I don’t trust the streets.”

“Tyson, I’m not ready to leave yet.” Kaci pouts. 

“I’m not letting them walk back alone,” Tyson insists. “You can stay if you want. Just make sure you don’t want back to the dorms alone. It’s not safe.”

“I’ll come with!” Kaci suddenly changes her tune. “I’ll be safest with you.”

“Cool, let’s head out.” Tyson leads the way out of the club. 

“It’s a nice place,” I comment as we leave. “Maybe I will come back here when I’m not as drained.”

“Yeah! We totally should. Maybe this weekend, you and I can come back here. They have half off drinks on Saturday-”

Kaci jumps in. “That’s a great idea! We should all come back.”

“What do you say, Melody?” Tyson asks, completely ignoring Kaci.

“It all depends on how the week goes.” I shrug. It’s true. I need to see how much homework we got, spend some time with Sam and Pop Pop, and definitely talk to Ray on the phone all weekend. Ray isn’t getting the amount of attention I wanted to give him today.

“Yeah, I’ll stay home this weekend, probably.” Ira adds.

“Well, have fun,” Kaci rushes out her answer. “So, I guess it’s just me and you this weekend, Tyson.”

“Unless Melody changes her mind.” Tyson says, almost sounding hopeful.

“Who cares…?” Kaci mumbles under her breath.

“Clearly, Tyson does. More than he cares about you.” I shoot back without thinking.

Ira and Tyson giggle to themselves and Kaci’s eyes grow wide.

Oops… Melody, you and your big, dumb mouth…

“Well, that was uncalled for!” Kaci snaps.

“Uh, not really,” I cross my arms. “You kinda deserved that.”

“You really did…” Ira adds, quietly.

“Shut up.” Kaci growls.

“Hey,” I narrow my eyes. “You can say whatever you want about me, but you leave her out of it.”

“Uh, guys?” Tyson tries to intervene.

“I can say what I want!” Kaci shouts. “Who the hell do you think you are talking to me like that?!”

“Look, we got off on the wrong foot,” I grumble to myself. I hate doing this, but I can’t really make an enemy in the first week… She does seem like a spoiled brat, though… “Let’s just drop it, okay?”

“Yeah, I like that plan,” Tyson smiles. “Why don’t we all just be friends, cool?”

We walk in silence to the dorms. I’m still annoyed. Kaci is shooting looks at me. Honestly, if looks could kill…

We approach my room. I take out my key. “Thanks for walking me back to my room.”

“Your room?” Tyson gives me a confused look. “This is our room, too. Oh! You’re the roommate we kept missing! That’s so weird!” Tyson starts to laugh, holding himself on the wall.

Kaci groans. “Great. Now we share a room, too?”

“Hey,” Ira giggles. “I guess I’ll have to take you up on that sleepover offer. Nice to meet you, roomie.”

“I need to make a call. I’ll be back. Head in without me.” I say before rushing off. I don’t stop until I’m outside. I pull out my phone and dial Ray’s number.

“Back already?” Ray answers. “How was your night, babe?”

Babe. I can’t help but grin and feel warm as he calls me that. “I met my roommates,” I start off. “Let me tell you… they are some interesting people.”

“Oh, cool. Tell me all about them.” Ray insists.

“Well, there’s me, a shy Achievement Hunter fan, an attention hog, and a Casanova…” I start telling him about my night.

This really is going to be an interesting semester.

 


	11. Missing You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's been some time since Melody has been by Ray's side, and now it's starting to take it's toll on her.

 “Melody,” I feel a tap on my shoulder. Ira is trying to wake me up. I curl into my blankets. “Come on. Let’s not be late again.” I feel the blankets being ripped away from me.

“Ugh…” I groan. I squint my eyes open. Ira is standing over me.

“This is what happens when you talk to the boyfriend all night,” Ira teases. “You have been talking on the phone with him really late the past week.”

“It’s not late to him,” I stretch and climb out of bed. “It’s hard trying to talk to him when we’re in different time zones.”

“I get that. But you have to start thinking about your studies, too,” Ira reminds me. “Here,” She hands me a cup of coffee. “It might be a bit cold. I got you your usual; French vanilla, two extra sugars.”

“Oh, god, I love you,” I graciously take the coffee and gulp it down. I glance at the clock and sigh. “You don’t have to wait for me. You can go to class without me. Don’t be late because of me.”

“I don’t mind waiting. It’s our first day in the classroom, so it’s not as bad as missing the bus for a field trip.” Ira crosses her arms.

“I already apologized for that,” I grumble. “And besides, we managed to get a cab.” I start walking to the bathroom and start brushing my teeth.

“So, how is the boyfriend, anyway? Everything okay back home?” Ira asks, standing in the door way of the bathroom.

I nod. “He’s okay,” I answer in between brushes. “How about you? How’s the fam?”

Ira shifts her weight and leans on the door frame. “Everything is fine. My mom, dad, and brother miss me and my friends are constantly asking me to come back. It’s nice to feel loved, you know?”

I spit out the remaining toothpaste to speak. “Must be nice,” I reply. “Ray is all I have back home.” The sudden realization that I lost what used to be a good friend is kind of sad. It’s not like Sadie was my best friend ever, but she was the only one I could call a close friend. I just have party friends. Ray is all I have… And all I want is to see him.

I walk over to my dresser, put on deodorant, and put on a hoodie over my tank top. I’ll just go to class in sweatpants. It’s not something I would usually do, but today, I’ll make an exception.

“Dude,” Ira calls. “I think someone is calling your Skype.”

I rush to my bed and hop on. I break out in a smile when Ray’s name appears on my screen. Perfect timing. “Hi, Ray!” I answer. Ira stays back. I know she doesn’t want to be too nosey, but little does she know that I’m talking to her favorite Achievement Hunter.

“Hey, babe,” Ray smiles. He’s wrapped up in his comforter, ready for bed. “I just wanted to make sure you were awake. You were up pretty late.”

In the corner of my eye, I see Ira’s head snap in my direction. She recognizes that voice. She seems hesitant. I know she wants to peek at the screen to be sure, but she doesn’t want to be rude. She stays near the door.

“I’ll be okay. I’ll sleep after class today. No big deal,” I shrug. “You look like you’re ready for bed.”

“Just about, yeah.” Ray nods.

“Well, look presentable. There’s someone I want you to meet really quick.” I smile.

Ray, looking confused, sits up and pats his hair down. “Presentable enough?”

“I just didn’t want to catch you off guard,” I giggle. I look over to Ira. “Ira, come meet my boyfriend. I think you’ll like him.”

Ira approaches in a hesitant manner. She stands behind me and bends down to see the screen. Her eyes grow wide.

“Ira,” I can’t help but smile. “I’m sure you know who this is. Ray, this is my roommate, Ira.”

“Hi,” Ray waves. “Melody has told me about you. Thanks for putting up with her. She can be a bitch sometimes.” Ray smirks.

“Don’t start.” I glare.

“You…” She points. “You’re Ray. Uh… I, I mean, H-Hi,” Ira raises her hand to wave. “It’s r-really nice to meet you!”

“Ira is the huge Achievement Hunter fan I mentioned.”

“Melody!” Ira squeaks.

“That’s cool. We’re just some assholes that play video games,” Ray chuckles. “But I’m glad you find some enjoyment out of watching them.”

Ira opens her mouth to speak, but nothing comes out.

“I better get going,” I sigh. I really wish I could just skip class and talk to him. “I’ll talk to you when you wake up. I’ll talk to you when you wake up.”

“Alright. Good morning.” Ray smiles.

“Goodnight.” I wave and cut the connection.

“That was Ray.” Ira whispers.

“Yes, Ira,” I nod. “Let’s not be late.”

“That was Ray.” She repeats as I pull her arm, leading her out our room.

“Yes, Ira.” I giggle at her fan girl shock.

We speed-walk to make it just in time for class.

Tyson perks up as we take our seats next to him. “You made it!”

“Finally…” A voice next to him grumbles.

“Oh, hi, Kaci. Didn’t see you there.” I respond in an unenthusiastic voice.

“I’m thinking we should have lunch together after class,” Tyson leans into me. “Sound cool to you, Melody?”

“Well, Ira and I were going to grab something in the lunch room…” I start begin to explain.

“You’re welcome to join us, though.” Ira adds. “We’re just going to do what we usually do. Get food, find a table, and start talking about homework…” Ira starts to list our usual lunch routine.

Tyson clears his throat. “I was actually thinking me and Melody could-”

“That’s a great idea!” Kaci jumps in. “Let’s all get lunch.”

“Oh, my dream.” Ira mumbles.

Kaci shoots a look in Ira’s direction. I return the glare. She quickly avoids eye contact. I want to be cool with everyone. But, she’s starting to annoy me. She’s like a pitiful puppy that no one wants around, but no one has the heart to say anything.

The four of us remain silent as Ms. Ricci begins her lecture. Things are going smoothly. I listen, and I write down anything important on the PowerPoint slide.

I wonder if Ray is sleeping well right now.

I shake my head. Now’s not the time for that. I start to copy the whole slide. Maybe that will keep me busy.

I wonder what Ray thinks about before falling asleep.

I drop my pencil down and rub the sides of my forehead. Not now, brain. Focus on school. You can talk to Ray tonight. Don’t get distracted.

I pick up my pencil and… attempt to focus on the lecture.

Ray…

I feel a poke at my side. I look over in Ira’s direction.

“Are you okay?” She’s mouths.

I hurry out a nod. I’m fine. I’m just sleepy, therefore, it’s harder to concentrate. No need to worry Ira.

Ira returns her attention back to Ms. Ricci. I look up at the slide on the projection. I don’t recall any information leading up to this. Did I get anything from the slide before it? Did I really just blink and miss something? What is with me today? Maybe I need another coffee. Whatever the case, I need to catch up. I’ll compare notes with Ira later. I just need to try and keep up.

_“I’ll miss you.”_

_“I’ll miss you, too.”_

He said that before I left… that was before we were together. He hasn’t said anything like that since. We talk to each other every night over the phone. Why haven’t I told him that I miss him yet?

I gather my books and sling my bag over my shoulder. Maybe I need to take a small walk, get a drink of water, and just clear my head.

Ira gives me a look of concern as I pass. I simply offer a smile of reassurance. Again, no need to worry Ira. I’m just having a hard time focusing. That’s all.

I feel all eyes on me as I exit the room. I always hated that. If someone is leaving the room, keep your eyes to the front or to your notes. You don’t have to stare someone down just because they got up.

But, of course, that’s just Bitchy Melody talking, right, Ray?

Ray…

The door closes behind me and I feel like I can’t move. What’s wrong with me? What is this feeling? I have everything I want right now. I’m working on my future, I’m making new friends, I’m reconnecting with family, and I have Ray. Why do I still feel so… incomplete?

I shake my head. Water. I just need water. I’m just over analyzing everything. I’ll feel better once I wake up more.

Although it feels like my feet are cemented to the ground, I force myself to move forward. I drag myself to the nearest water cooler. Even that feels like a task. I fill a paper cup with water. I lean against the wall as I take a few small sips.

_"There were moments where I couldn’t hide it. I was going to tell you. But I knew that wasn’t fair. It is you that I want. I knew that since the day I bumped into you and made you fall. I’ve liked you from the beginning. I even love the way we fight. It’s hard to piss me off and yet you do it so easily. I don’t know how you get these kind of emotions out of me, but I’m glad that you do."_

“Ray…” A small sigh escapes my lips. This is what I wanted, right? I said I wanted to be with someone, and then I met Ray. I never thought that being with him would hurt so much. Why the hell does this hurt?

I can’t resist anymore. I take out my cell and start to call Ray. I’m going to feel bad if I wake him. I just need to hear him. Tell him that I miss him.

“Hey, you’ve reached Ray. Just leave a message-” His voice mail starts up.

“Of course…” I hang up. He’s asleep. What did you expect?

I guide myself off the wall and start heading back to class. I really need to at least pretend that I’m paying attention.

\------------------------

“I don’t think Kaci likes me.” Ira says in a soft voice, once we are a safe distance from Kaci and Tyson, eating our lunch.

“Oh, yeah?” I respond absently.

“Yeah,” Ira continues. “Like while you were gone, I swear she was glaring at me. Speaking of which,” Her voice trails off. Oh boy. I knew this was coming. “What happened in class? Are you feeling okay? Should we swing by the nurse’s office for you?”

“Ira,” I force a smile. “I’m alright.”

Ira raises an eyebrow.

“Oh. Right. Silent observer,” I sigh. I forgot. Ira has a bullshit detector. No one can hide the truth from her. “I’m just not feeling like myself, you know? I’m trying. It’s just an off day.”

“Perhaps. It happens to the best of us. It’s understandable,” Ira nods in agreement. “But usually, when I’m having those moods, there is a direct cause. Like, sure, it will go away. But you know you can talk to me, right? I won’t force you to talk, but…”

“I know,” I respond. “And thanks. It does mean a lot. Just… let me see how I feel in the next few days. If it keeps happening, I’ll talk to you.”

“Hmm. Better than nothing,” Ira pouts her lips. I love being around her. She’s not pushy, yet she worries about me. “So! It seems we have lost Tyson and Kaci for the time being. What shall we do?”

I scroll through my phone, debating on calling again. “Huh? Oh. Whatever you want to do.”

“Hm…” Ira hums. “Perhaps you should call him.”

Damn. How does she do that? “What are you talking about? I don’t want to call him right now.” I lie.

Ira raises an eyebrow.

“He’s asleep, anyway.” I sigh in defeat. Why try to lie to her?

“I have a feeling he will wake up eventually. Just keep calling.”

“You want me to harass my own boyfriend?” I ask.

“I didn’t really see it as harassment. Ray wouldn’t be mad if he knew that you needed him, right?”

“Honestly, I think he would be pissed,” I can’t help but chuckle. I can just imagine a sleepy scowl on his face and he whines about how early it is. “I think I can hold out until he wakes up.”

Ira nods. “If that’s what you want to do,” She looks down at her phone. “Damn… okay, I have to run to the library for a bit. Mom is sending me some stuff and I have to print them out.”

“Go on. No need to explain. I’ll just meet you back at the dorm.” I wave my hand.

“You don’t want to come with?” Ira offers.

“Maybe some alone time will be best,” I admit. “Go ahead.”

Ira collects her books. “Okay. I’ll be back soon. It won’t help much, but I hope you start feeling back to normal soon.”

“Same.” I sigh as I pick up my bag.

Once Ira and I separate, I debate on calling Ray. Maybe he’s awake. Maybe he’s having problems sleeping…. Nah. It’s Ray. Of course, he’ll be knocked out.

“Melody?” I hear footsteps speed up behind me. Tyson appears to my side. “Hey. I thought you were hanging with Ira.”

“She had things to do. I was just going to head to the room. Where’s Kaci?” I ask, scanning the area. Anywhere Tyson would be, Kaci isn’t far behind.

“How would I know?” Tyson shrugs. “Why do you automatically assume Kaci is always around me?”

Oh, you silly boy, you. “You’re right. Never mind.”

“So, why are you heading to the room this early? That’s so unlike you.” Tyson comments.

“Funny you should say that. I’m not quite feeling like myself.” I mumble. It’s just a bad day. Maybe I can just sleep it off.

Tyson scuffs his foot to the ground, avoiding eye contact. “Oh… Hey, mind taking a walk with me? If you’re up for it, that is. Maybe talking will help?”

“That’s sweet, Tyson. I’ll take you up on that walk, but I definitely won’t talk about it.” I shake my head. There’s nothing to talk about, really. Why is everyone so worried?

Tyson’s face lights up. He loops his arm through mine. “So, I was so bored earlier in class. I almost fell asleep.” He starts to ramble as we walk.

It’s been a week. If I’m feeling lonely without Ray now, how am I going to survive the whole five months? Ray and I just got everything established between us… What if he gets bored with the long distance? I wouldn’t blame him, honestly. This was a bad time to start seeing each other. What if he can’t wait for me…? I know Sadie is still there. What if he starts wanting her again…? What if…

“So how are things with the so called “boyfriend”?” Tyson teases.

“Ray and I…” My voice cracks and I feel tears well up. No. Not now. I blink them away, hoping he didn’t notice.

Tyson frowns. “Woah, is everything okay?”

“Of course. Everything is great.” I lie. I’m thinking too much about it. Ray would never do that. If he was really unhappy, he would just end things.

“You just look so down,” Tyson comments. “Is there anything I can help with?”

I shake my head. “Really, Tyson. I’m fine.”

Tyson stares for a moment. “Oh,” He grins. “I know where we can go. Feel like going on an adventure with me?”

“An adventure? Sure,” I shrug. “Where are we going?”

Tyson untangles his arm from mine to grab my hand. “Let’s go!” Tyson excitedly hurries ahead, pulling me behind.

“Tyson! Hold on!” I shout as I try to keep up.

“It’s not that far! But we have to hurry!”

“Tyson,” I can’t help but giggle. “I don’t feel like running.”

“Well, too bad.” He teases.

We weave through the crowd, getting dirty looks as we zoom past everyone.

“Are we getting close?”

“Yep! Almost there. You can’t miss it,” Tyson hums. He starts slowing up as we approach a river. It carries on as far as the eye can see. It appears to flow through the city. “See? Here we are.” I thought he would let go of my hand once we got here, but he continues to hold on as we walk along the river.

“So what is this? What’s so special about this river?” I ask.

“This is the Arno River. I come here to walk along the bridges when I get homesick,” Tyson admits. “I don’t know if that’s what’s bugging you, but I thought this might help.”

“You’re homesick?”

Tyson shrugs. “Isn’t everyone? We’re a long way from home. Hell, this is the first time I’ve been away from my Mom.”

“You’re close with her?” I ask.

Tyson nods. “She’s been my support system ever since Dad left. She worked so hard to get me and my brother to college.”

“I didn’t know that.” I look along the river. It is relaxing here. Tyson is on to something here.

“Well, you never asked,” Tyson smiles. “What about you? Are you and your mom close?”

“Ha… Which one?” I force a smile. “Apparently, my birth mom died before I got to meet her. But I loved my parents. They… died in a car accident. I was twelve.”

“Adoptive parents?” Tyson asks for clarification.

I nod. “I was with them for a short time. I still loved them. They took great care of me…”

“So, if you don’t mind me asking, who do you live with now?”

“I live by myself.” I inform him. “I didn’t leave many people behind… Just my boyfriend.” The sudden mention of Ray reminds me that Tyson is still grasping my hand. I wiggle my hand away.

“Wow. Living on your own at nineteen. That must be difficult.” Tyson says in awe.

“I’m twenty four, actually. I’m almost done with school. Next semester is my last one.” Nineteen? What gave him the impression that I was that young?

Tyson’s cheeks start to turn pink. “Oh. I’m sorry. You looked so young. I assumed we were the same age….” He clears his throat.

“Thanks for that. It makes me feel young,” I giggle. I know I’m not old. But still… twenty four? In just six years, I’ll be in my thirties… yikes…

We continue to walk in comfortable silence. The river shimmers with the bright afternoon sun. I know Ray likes being indoors, but I wonder what he’ll think of this place.

“So, I was wondering… What about your biological dad? Is he around? Have you tried to reach out to him?” Tyson continues.

“Hahahah!” I begin to laugh uncontrollably. “Funny you should ask… You know Professor Clark, the guy in charge of the program? Yeah. That’s my dad.”

“Well, damn,” Tyson raises his eyebrows. “Maybe I shouldn’t mess with you, then. I’d rather not get kicked out of the program.”

“You’re fine,” I chuckle. “It’s my boyfriend that has to watch out.” Ah, Ray… I hope you wake up soon. I just want to hear your voice.

“I’m still not convinced that you have a boyfriend.” Tyson pouts.

“Well, that’s your problem. I do have a boyfriend.” I cross my arms.

“So,” Tyson stops walking and places his hands on the bridge railing, trapping me. What's he doing? “If what would happen if we kissed right now?”

I shrug. “Why would I do that? We’re friends. I wouldn’t try to kiss you. Don’t worry.”

Tyson’s face drops. “No, I’m trying to-”

I start looking around. “Hey, there are a lot of couples around here,” I observe. “Maybe we should start heading back to the dorms? We don’t want to get in the way.”

“But-”

My phone begins to ring, cutting Tyson off again. I check the screen. Ray…

“Hello?” I answer without hesitation.

“Good afternoon to you,” Ray yawns. I feel my heart melt at the sound of his voice. “How was class?”

“It was… can I talk about that later? I just… want to talk to you.”

“Oh,” I hear Ray shuffling around. “Are you okay?”

How many times am I going to get asked that today? “I’m fine now.”

Tyson huffs, taking his hands off the railing. Oh, maybe I shouldn’t be on the phone.

“I’m glad… Uh… But what was wrong? Or is that what you want to talk about later?”

“Yeah,” I admit. “Can I call you back in like twenty minutes?” I ask, gaining Tyson’s attention. “I’m with my friend right now and I feel like I’m being rude.”

“Yeah. No problem....” Ray pauses. “Um… hey… I just wanted to quickly say something…”

“Yes?”

“Uh…” Ray hesitates. “I don’t know if this is silly or anything, but I’m going to say it anyway. I… um… I miss you.”

“Wha… what?” Did I hear him right?

“It’s random. I know,” I can almost see the embarrassed look on his face. “I was thinking a little bit before I went to bed and I’m really bummed that we didn’t talk about our relationship sooner. We admitted our feelings and then you left the next day. I just want to see you.”

I take a deep breath. “I miss you, too.”

“I sure hope so,” Ray chuckles. “Uh... sorry. I hate being sappy like that. Anyway, keep hanging with your friend. Just call me back soon. Bye.”

“Bye.” I hang up. I feel almost relieved. I knew just hearing his voice would make everything better.

“So, that was the boyfriend.” Tyson almost sounds… annoyed? I think. I don’t know how else to describe it.

“Yeah. Sorry to cut this short. Can we head back to the campus?”

“Yeah. Sure.” Maybe it’s just me, but Tyson doesn’t sound as mellow as he was earlier. Did I do something to annoy him?

\------------------

“We’re back.” I announce as Tyson and I enter the room.

“Oh, hi,” Ira looks up from her book. “Where did you two run off to?”

Kaci looks mortified.

“We took a small walk around Arno River.” Tyson answers.

I drop off my bag and start leaving the room. Now I can head to my usual spot to talk to Ray. “I’ll be back.” I say before closing the door.

“She has a boyfriend, right? Maybe she shouldn’t be going on dates with other people.” I hear Kaci mumble.

“Kaci. Chill. It wasn’t a date.” Tyson grumbles. “Trust me…”

I’ll worry about that later. I don’t feel like dealing with that now. I dial Ray’s number. He answers before the first ring is over.

“Hey.” He answers.

“Eager to hear from me?” I tease.

“Nah. There’s nothing good on T.V. this early,” I can almost imagine his smirk. “So what’s up?”

I make my way to the roof. “I couldn’t focus on class today.”

“Why’s that?”

“I was thinking about you, too,” I admit. “Pretty much what you were thinking about. It wasn’t fair. We never got a chance to be a real couple before I left.”

“Well, what’s a real couple anyway? We still talk, we at least went on a date before you left. Who’s to say this isn’t really dating?” Ray argues.

“I know. But it’s not the same.” I point out.

“I do know what you,” Ray admits. “I can’t even try to be stubborn on this one.”

“So… In five months, how about you and I go on a real date? If you’re up for it.” I giggle.

“Oh, I’ll be up for it.” Ray answers. “I’ll date the shit out of you. Just you wait and see.”

“Ray!” I shout, laughing. “What does that even mean?”

“It means I’m going to tackle you once you get off the plane, I’ll steal you for the day and we’ll go where ever you want. Maybe we’ll see a movie.”

“But I’m going to be very jetlagged.” I remind him.

“Then I’m stealing you and we’re napping at my apartment, okay? I just want to be with you.” Ray insists.

“I’d love to take a nap with you, Ray. Relationship goals.” I chuckle.

“Everyone is going to wish they were us! We are like the world’s best couple,” Ray jokes. “And we don’t even get along all the time.”

“We’re getting along pretty well right now,” I say. “So… Should I come home early? I don’t really need to be here. I just want to be with you.”

“If you come home, it has to be because you want to be here, not because of me,” Ray says sternly. “This is a huge opportunity. I don’t want you to give it up because of me. You need to at least try to stick it out.”

“All I want is you, though!” I whine. Maybe I shouldn’t have said that.

Ray goes quiet for a moment. “As much as I want to tell you to come home, I don’t want to stand in your way. You worked so hard for this, Melody. I want you to do your best.”

“Okay…” I try not to sound disappointed. He’s right…

“Besides,” Ray sounds hesitant to say the next part. “The longer we’re apart, the more rewarding the physical part of our relationship will be…” His voice trails off.

“Oh?” I think for a moment. “Oh…” I begin to blush when realize what he means…

Has he been thinking about that a lot?

“So, you’re feeling better now?” Ray clears his throat, changing the subject.

“Now that I’m talking to you, yeah…” I sigh. I really do feel better. Sure, I miss him like crazy, but I can at least talk to him.

“Good…” Ray takes a deep breath. “I don’t say this enough. I care about you. And I want you to be happy.”

“So… You need to convince me to go to work today. Because I’m considering calling off.”

“Ray…” I begin to scold him.

Maybe things won’t be so bad. It’s just going to take time… And a lot of patience. 

 


End file.
